Bethenny Getting HARRIED!
Bethenny Getting HARRIED!
The one thing I like about this show, is how the title has a question mark at the end, to provide a mystery that lasted all of one episode. But maybe Jason will break it off? That I would watch.

Bethenny has enlisted a guy who looks like Tony Hale (Buster Bluth, Arrested Development) to plan her wedding in four weeks. Nervous Wedding Planner makes this all much more stressful than necessary, but Bethenny likes him because he's gay and he's there. Does anyone else feel like Sean the Wedding Planner might get fired? His homosexuality won't do ALL the work.


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Bethenny made lenten frittatas for her in-laws and managed to make it boring. But now she's ready to say yes to a dress that "embraces the bump." She's all business about this wedding dress thing, really this whole wedding thing. Just watching this show stresses me out. She has to find a dress, plan her wedding, hang out with her in-laws, be pregnant, and get her book together? #$%@.

Luckily, Bethenny found her "balls to the wall, I'm a bride, own it," dress at Amsale. And we all cried hot sympathy stress tears. Or angry tears that that dress probably costs more than a used car. But WHATEVER, it's Bethenny! Does anyone else almost feel bad for Jason?

But there's no time to feel bad for Jason, because Bethenny goes to her therapist so that we feel bad for her, instead. I guess I feel bad for her, but if I think about it too much it gives me empathy stress. Even with all this attention, she still has time to chew out that guy Max who looks like Jonathan from The Bachelorette.

But enough about Bethenny, let's focus on Bethenny's DOG, Cookie, who is also stressed out. Cookie doesn't like people, Bethenny doesn't like people, I don't particularly care for either of them. 

While working on her skin care line (?!), Bethenny meets a guy with messed up face skin and thinks, I kid you not, "Dude, what's up with your face?!" What's up with YOUR face, Bethenny. But let's not dwell on it, it's time for Bethenny and Jason to register for wedding gifts. Because they should really get more STUFF. 

And now, Registry! a play.
Bethenny: So, are people just AWFUL when they do this?
Bloomingdales Guy With No Sense of Humor: Uh, no not really.
(Bethenny opens her mouth at Jason for a long time as if to say, "I'M HILARIOUS. WE ARE NOT AWFUL LIKE I THINK OTHER PEOPLE ARE.")
Bethenny: Are we napkin ring people? Are we coffee-after-dinner people?! HAHAHAHAHA!
(silence)
Bloomingdales Guy: Okbye.

AND SCENE!

So what do people think of Bethenny? Are we supposed to like her? Fill me in here.

Check back with us tomorrow for "Bethenny is SO busy... (HOW BUSY IS SHE?!)", your old school joke fix centering around Bethenny's life.

(image courtesy of Bravo)

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