'The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' Season 4 Premiere Recap: New Wives and New Hair
'The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' Season 4 Premiere Recap: New Wives and New Hair
Gina Pusateri
Gina Pusateri
Contributing Writer, BuddyTV
It's the season 4 premiere of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. And now that we've shaken off the sad dead weight -- Adrienne Maloof and Taylor Armstrong -- it's time to see where these catty drama queens take us. And hopefully it will be more fun than the last few seasons.

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Model Citizens

Yolanda is out on location where her daughter Gigi is doing some Grade A. At least I assume it's Grade A because that's what Yolanda says it is. Gigi is happy that all of her hard work of dieting and exercising has really paid off. And I'm sure it has paid off. Girl is the face of Guess at 18. That's some mega dollar bills, ya'll.

Having just recovered from being sick for the last nine months with Lyme disease, Yolanda has really learned to appreciate the important things in her life. But now she knows who her real friends are. Specifically, Brandi was there for her and Kyle never was.

Kyle is holding her own weird grudge against Yolanda. She's mad that Yolanda lied about something or another at the reunion. She wanted her to admit that she said something nasty about Lisa in Paris and she didn't. So Kyle called her a liar, and that's just one thing Kyle cannot tolerate. Because Kyle is a pure beacon of countless good qualities.

Most of Lisa's time these days is taken up by practicing with her hunky dance partner Gleb for Dancing with the Stars. But she makes some time to visit Kyle, who wants to hire her restaurant staff from SUR to cater her Chamber of Commerce event. Lisa agrees, but finds it laughable that Kyle has anything to do with the Chamber of Commerce due to her lack of business acumen.

Lisa addresses some of the rumors that have been circulating Kyle in the tabloids by way of a few of her dry British jabs. She asks if the younger woman Mauricio has been seen with is their little daughter Portia. Kyle does not appreciate Lisa's jokes; one thing she cannot tolerate (besides liars) is people making jokes at her expense.

Moving On Up

Now that Brandi is a big shot with a book on the bestseller's list, she is looking to upgrade to a nicer home for her and her boys. Her realtor, J.R., who is also her boyfriend, is the guy she was accused of having bathroom sex with at Kyle's last white party. But don't worry, the only sex that has happened with J.R. occurred after the white party and definitely not in Kyle's house.

Going through her divorce made Brandi realize that she never wants to have to rely on a man again for financial support. She is enjoying the empowerment from being her own earner way too much to ever allow that again.

Kim is still working on her recovery, which is an ongoing process. But she got a puppy to fill the void that her children left when they went off to live their own lives. It would be a little sad if it wasn't so cute. 

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Business Party

Kyle's Chamber of Commerce party arrives and Bravo tries to force Vanderpump Rules on us like it's actually a show we care about. But don't worry, I'll spare you the details here.

Yolanda decides to come to Kyle's party after Kyle called her with a personal invitation. But she arrives with Brandi and acts standoffish the whole time, even admitting that this is the last place that she wants to be.

We finally get to meet the new housewives, who arrive to Kyle's party. Joyce is a gorgeous Puerto Rican beauty queen who has the most beautiful perfect hair I have ever seen. I just want to run my fingers through it. Joyce's hair: come to me.

Carlton is an original Londoner who seems a bit judgey. Yet she gets mad when people judge her for her kids' names, which are Destiny, Mystery and Cross. Look, lady, I know we don't know each other yet, but if you don't want people to make fun of your kids' names, then don't give them weird names.

Lisa insists that she is not holding a grudge against Kyle. If she did, she wouldn't be at her party, she wouldn't have lunch with her and she wouldn't call her up to chat. But Kyle remains skeptical. She says that Lisa is condescending, although she seems to be enjoying her attention in the moment.

Just before Bravo ushers us off into a completely different show, Brandi gets the line of the night when she points out Scheana's (the SUR waitress who banged Brandi's then-husband) busted tooth. She tells Kim in the kitchen, "She slept with my husband so, yeah, I'm going to mention her gray tooth." #Logic.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills airs Mondays at 8pm on Bravo.

(Image courtesy of Bravo)