'Bachelorette' Roundup: One Last Spoilery, Sneak Peeky Snark-Fest Before Ashley's Big Day
'Bachelorette' Roundup: One Last Spoilery, Sneak Peeky Snark-Fest Before Ashley's Big Day
Meghan Carlson
Meghan Carlson
Senior Writer, BuddyTV
I'm back! Well rested from a week of vacation (special thanks again to Carla for recapping this week's episode so hilariously!) and just in time for one final Friday push of pre-finale Bachelorette news, rumors, spoilers and sneak peeks.

Whether you've taken a break from your Bachelorette reading this week or been watching like an eagle-eyed falcon for all the latest updates, this roundup's got something for you. So catch up, brush up and laugh it up before Ashley pushes one of her final guys down on bended knee and begins her "happily forever after" in that furry, feathery flurry of a dress:

Mark the calendar, set the DVR and stock up the chardonnay: Just a reminder, this SUNDAY, JULY 31, the "Men Tell All" special airs at 9pm. Then, on MONDAY, AUGUST 1, the Bachelorette finale airs from 8-10pm and the "After the Final Rose" special airs at 10pm. Two whole nights and five whole hours of Bachelorette finale footage? If there is such a thing as being too blessed, we are probably it, you guys.

Speaking of the Men Tell AllWill they actually tell all? Or even some? We'll take "some." Speaking of some: Here are some sneak peek videos!

  • "I told myself I wasn't going to get emotional here.": Riiiight. Here's a clip of Ashley crying about Bentley again. At least her hair looks great!
  • "He's a narcissist, a liar and a coward.": And here are the men bashing Bentley. Way to go, boys!
  • "I don't know the guy that well, so I mean, I respect whatever he chooses to do.": And here's a clip of Ashley talking about Bentley a little too diplomatically, and who she thinks should be the next Bachelor. Ryan or Ames?! Girl, get your head checked. (But not the outside part of the head because, like I said, your hair looks so great.) Ryan's million teeth, Constantine's boredom and Ames' concussion-face make appearances too.
  • "It's led me to somebody very special.": Constantine has a girlfriend. But this interview is more entertaining if you watch it for all of Ashley's primping directly behind him. [LA Times]

And here are some tantalizing hints about what we'll see at the MTA:

From ABC's press release:
  • William bein' William (overwhelmed, emotionally unequipped): "When William takes the hot seat, he can barely stand the heat. He can't even look at the footage being played of his time on the show. And when a clip of his infamous comedy roast of Ashley is played, he can't bear to hear it."
  • Ryan's Bachelor interview continues: "Ryan admits the journey changed him - for the better." [Ed. note: *eyeroll*]
  • Filler, filler, filler ... from those who've been there before: "Then Ali, DeAnna and Jason share with Ashley their thoughts about what she went through this season as she struggled with Bentley."
  • And from Chris Harrison: "Tim steals the show." Well, DUH! Drunk Tim is the best. [TV Guide]

Why is Ashley's sister being "SUCH A BITCH" about JP? According to ABC's finale press release, "Chrystie offers J.P. a litany of things that she finds troubling about any future relationship he might be planning with her sister." [Translation: She thinks he is too old and boring.] And this sneak peek clip confirms that for Chrystie, opinions are like tattoos: The more, and the more out in the open, the better. Yikes-a-mundo! Ashley, if your love-life were a videogame, your own sister would be the final boss:

The anti-scandal of J.P. Rosenbaum's ex-girlfriends: Who cares, don't buy it, who cares. [OK!, Hollywood Life, In Style]

Reality Steve reality spills all he knows about the finale and "After the Final Rose":
SPOILER ALERT! There will be "hugging, kissing, spinning around, and making out in the water" at some point in the finale. Read his latest blog post for more.

Regarding that rumor about Ben F. and Britt:
Someone close to the story says it's not true!

According to Chris Harrison, there are 3 men in the running for the next Bachelor:
Chris seems to think it's between Ames, Ryan and Ben. Personally, I'd rather see a two-headed Ames-Ben Frankenstein monster than Ryan in the role. (I mean ... THIS guy, you guys? Noooo!) But maybe THAT'S JUST ME! (It's not just me. Carla agrees! I asked.) Whom would you least like to see handing out roses? Post your non-pick in the comments! [TV Guide]

Finally, peep the final set of photos from Monday's finale. Can you believe Ashley's journey is almost over? I'm so excited I could nap all weekend in dread of recapping five hours of feelings anticipation.

(Image courtesy of ABC)