The Las Vegas callbacks for
So You Think You Can Dance were a bloodbath. In just two hours, the six judges whittled a field of 172 dancers down to just 32, crushing the hopes and dreams of 140 aspiring dancers.
But scarier than the prospect of learning six styles in four days were some of the choreographers. Tabitha and Napoleon seem nice enough as does the bubbly and fabulous Tyce Diorio, but there are two female choreographers who I would never want to run into in a dark alley: Sonya Tayeh and Mia Michaels?
Which of these tough women is truly the scariest and most bad-ass
choreographer on the planet? Let's look at the way they look, the
dance styles they specialize in, and their overall attitude to
determine who wins the title of
So You Think You Can Dance's Scariest
Choreographer.
The Look:
This category is pretty easy. Sonya Tayeh has a mohawk and looks like
an extra from Mad Max. Mia Michaels, on the other hand, looks like
your high school English teacher, or maybe I'm just swayed because I
think she looks just like Mrs. Darbus from
High School Musical. Based
solely on appearance, Sonya is 10 times scarier than Mia.
WINNER: Sonya Tayeh
The Dance Style:
On the surface, jazz seems a bit scarier. It's fast and energetic, and
Sonya demands a lot from her dancers. But then again, even Full
House's Stephanie Tanner was in a jazz dance troupe, so how hard can it
really be?
Contemporary, on the other hand, is deceptively difficult. It looks
beautiful and lyrical, but Mia Michaels wants nothing less than
perfection, as indicated by her Emmy. She will make you bend your body
into shapes you didn't think possible and make your body ache to
achieve true beauty. I don't dance, but learning Sonya's choreography
seems a lot less terrifying than being led by Mia Michaels.
WINNER: Mia Michaels
The Attitude:
Once again, Sonya seems like the obvious choice with her foul mouth and
rocker chick look. But from what we've seen, Sonya isn't all that
scary.
Mia Michaels, however, has unleashed the beast this season. She's
cursing more than ever, and she has shown no compassion. While Nigel
Lythgoe and Mary Murphy were nice enough to let Sex in the choreography
round during the auditions to teach him a lesson, Mia wanted no part of
it. And while half the judges kept Caitlin Kinney in the competition
after she danced for her life in Las Vegas, Mia still voted against her.
But the biggest example of Mia Michaels' bad-ass attitude came when she
confronted early frontrunner Brandon Bryant during the group round.
Even though he has a lot of talent, Mia yelled at him that she would
have no problem cutting him. Though she meant eliminating him from the
competition, it sounded like she was read to bust out a pocket knife
and carve him from ear to ear. And she was so scary I believed it
could happen.
WINNER: Mia Michaels
So while Sonya Tayeh might look scarier, looks are deceiving on
So You
Think You Can Dance. Mia Michaels, the sweet-looking older lady, will
cut you, yell at you, curse, and make you work harder than you ever
thought possible, contorting your body into new positions for the sake
of artistry. That's quite scary, and during the season 5 auditions,
Mia Michaels proved she is one bad-ass mamma jamma you don't want to
mess with.
-John Kubicek, BuddyTV Senior Writer
(Image courtesy of FOX)