It's the final week of the blind auditions on The Voice
season 4, which means it's time for teams to fill up quickly. This
episode is pretty much non-stop good singers as the four coaches all
fill up their teams to 11 each.
In the process, there are a few interesting facts. Of the eight successful singers who are featured prominently, Shakira pushes her button on ALL of them, making her a bit of a button slut. For the first time all season, Usher finally wins a four-chair battle. And there's an amazing singer who may or may not be an unidentified body at the morgue (her name is Jane Smith) who gets no one to turn around because the coaches get way too picky when they only have one spot left.Jeff Lewis ("U Got It Bad" by Usher)
He now works at a golf course after having a record contract that fell through. And he's definitely NOT the same Jeff Lewis from Bravo's Flipping Out
, which is a shame because I'd love to see that guy chatting with the coaches. Doing an Usher song is odd, but he mixes it up and makes it pretty cool with his guitar. He's like a less ambitious Christian Porter.Coaches
: Usher, Blake Shelton and Shakira turn around at the last minute. Whew, I was genuinely worried no one would turn around, which would've been insane because he was very cool. But we're reaching that point where there are only a handful of spots left, so the coaches are going to be more picky and probably pass on good singers. He joins Team Usher
. It's kind of a giveaway when the contestant sings a song by one of the coaches.
Shawna P. ("She Talks to Angels" by The Black Crowes)
She's a 48-year-old woman, which makes her a senior citizen on The Voice. She worked with the Music Mafia in Nashville that helped launch the careers of people like Big 'n' Rich and Gretchen Wilson. She sounds eerily like Melissa Etheridge to me.Coaches
: Shakira and Adam Levine turn around. Cue the international war once again. She joins Team Shakira
. If it weren't so politically incorrect, I feel like Adam might jokingly threaten to call immigration if Shakira steals another artist he wants.
Caroline Glaser ("Tiny Dancer" by Elton John)
She's an 18-year-old folksy chick who plays in coffee houses. She has one of those cutesy, overly precious voices that I don't enjoy.Coaches
: Shakira and Blake turn around. They both want her unique voice, but because she's a songwriter, she joins Team Blake
. I'll be surprised if she survives the battle rounds.
Cameron ("As Long As You Love Me" by Justin Bieber)
He's a singer/dancer/actor/choreographer/producer and I absolutely hate his confidence. And his bowtie. On the Doctor, it's cool. On him, it's annoying. He spends way too much time dancing (which the coaches can't see) and he proves that you can take any average voice, put a cool dance beat under it, and make a hit. In an odd way he's protesting the concept of this show, because Bieber is the world's biggest star, but he doesn't need a great voice and probably wouldn't get any coaches to turn around. The music industry is style over substance.Coaches
: No one turns around
. Ha, comeuppance! It's The Voice
, not The Dance
.Michael Austin ("Somebody Like You" by Keith Urban)
His nickname is Big Country (which is self-explanatory) and he's a deputy sheriff. He's kind of awesome and he's not wearing sleeves, but it's hard to tell because of his tattoos. If I were a criminal in his town, one look at him would make me walk the straight and narrow.Coaches
: Adam and Shakira turn around. Adam then spends all of his time making fun of Blake for not pushing his button (Blake thought he was pitchy, and he's not totally wrong). He joins Team Adam
. Adam is certainly collecting some country singers, but his team is way too talent-heavy, so I'm sure Blake will steal one or two in the battle rounds.
Sasha Allen ("Not Ready to Make Nice" by the Dixie Chicks)
She's a classically-trained pianist with a newborn and a 7-year-old, who are adorable. And she was a back-up singer for people like Christina Aguilera (and Usher, which seems like it should be against the rules, assuming this show has any). I'm instantly in love with her and picking up a real Amanda Brown vibe in terms of her cross-genre appeal, since she's got a big diva voice, but is singing a country song for the story.Coaches
: All four coaches turn around. They all want her bad and Shakira plays the Girl Card, calling men "different animals." She joins Team Adam
. Wow, I have a feeling the other coaches are gonna be salivating to steal from Adam Levine's battle rounds, because he has a ton of potential winners.
Matt Cermanski ("Teenage Dream" by Katy Perry)
His uncle was in the disco group The Trammps (known for "Disco Inferno"). Carson Daly is AMAZED that a dude is singing this Katy Perry song. Um, does he really not know about Darren Criss on Glee
: No one turns around
. The coaches all criticize him for picking a dance track that is impossible to make sound good unless you're name is Katy Perry. I ask again, did I fall into an alternate universe where Blaine never serenaded Kurt with this song once with the Warblers and again in an incredibly moving piano version?Jamila Thompson, Amy Whitcomb, Justin Rivers, Michelle Raitzin
We have to get things moving, so we gloss over four more singers who make teams. Jamila goes to Team Adam
, Amy goes to Team Usher
, while Justin and Michael both join Team Blake
Mary Miranda ("Como La Flor" by Selena)
She's from Cuba and is singing in Spanish. There's only one way this story ends, and it's not with Usher doing his Dance of Joy.Coaches
: Shakira, Usher and Blake turn around. Shakira is like, "Seriously dudes, are you even gonna bother talking?" And she's right, because Mary joins Team Shakira
Grace Askew ("These Boots Are Made for Walkin'" by Nancy Sinatra)
She sings a blues/country hybrid she calls "bluntry" (ugh, lame). I wonder if she's related to American Idol
's Charlie. She's weird and fun, like country music's answer to Melanie Martinez. Coaches
: Shakira and Blake turn around. Just like Blake couldn't compete for a Spanish singer, Shakira can't really compete for a girl in cowboy boots. She joins Team Blake
Jane Smith ("You've Got the Love" by Florence and the Machine)
Um, is this REALLY her name? She's a quirky 18-year-old who made up songs about spiders as a kid. When she was 11 her dad was diagnosed with brain cancer and then her mom got breast cancer. Her mom survived, but her dad died less than two years later.Coaches
: No one turns around
. Wow, this is insane because she was fantastic. This is what happens at the end of the blind auditions, because the coaches are being far too picky. She could've done well in this competition.Ryan Innes ("Gravity" by John Mayer)
He was going to be a doctor, but then his engagement fell apart a few weeks before the wedding, so he reevaluated his life and decided to pursue the career he wants. I really hate that Carson keeps talking about how Ryan proves it's never too late to pursue your dream, because 31 is NOT too old for anything. When did 31 become the new 51?Coaches
: All four coaches turn around. The coaches are way too generous with the buttons this season. He's the eighth singer to get all four coaches to turn around, which is two more than the previous high. After some coach bickering, he joins Team Usher
Tomorrow night is the end of the blind auditions, and every coach needs just one more singer to complete their teams. So I fully expect another Jane Smith situation.
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