For the evening's plans Bret has dreamed up a romantic dinner date for all three girls and he is super excited for it. Unfortunately, despite the beautiful setting, the mood is somber and silent. Bret tries his best to make small talk and carry the conversation, but no one is responding to him. Most awkward dinner, ever. Finally fed up with the silent treatment, Bret leaves the table and goes for a drink. When he returns he describes the date like dinner with the in-laws and tells the girls if he has to sit through another dinner like that, he will send all of the girls home. At this moment, I imagine Bret is having serious regrets about sending all the wild girls home..at least it wouldn't have been silent with Ashley around. Bret tells the remaining girls, if he has to sit through another disastrous dinner like that, he's going to send all three of them home.
After the disastrous dinner Bret decides to take Jamie for a little one-on-one time in his bedroom. Bret says he hasn't spent as much time with Jamie as the other girls and needs to spend the night with her. Bret likes Jamie's honesty and her good attitude despite "the Sister Grimm trying to take her down." Despite his fondness for Jamie, Bret is worried that she's not ready for a serious relationship. When Bret asks her if she's looking for a serious relationship, she says she's not looking to get married right away, which for some reason, freaks the never-been-married Bret Michaels out.
While Bret and Jamie are getting to know each other, former friends Mindy and Taya are fighting. Taya is crying, saying she feels "desperately misunderstood." Mindy tells Taya that she just wants to see something real from Taya and for her to let her insecurities out. Taya snaps back, "I don't have insecurities." So you are perfect Taya? This woman is delusional, for real. Mindy realizes, having a conversation with Taya is usless...and I couldn't agree more. Taya however, is not done with Mindy and she starts yelling about how she doesn't need Mindy to point out her flaws and how she is "29 going on 129." I wouldn't say that Taya, but you are definitely 29 going on 35, at least. By the end of their argument it's official, Mindy and Taya are no longer friends.
It's time for the second to last elimination and you could cut the tension with a knife. Mindy says she knows she's the right girl for Bret, because it feels like they fit together. Taya is still talking trash about her former BFF Mindy. And Jamie just hopes that Bret prefers a sane girl over an insane one, because then she is in the finale. For the third elimination in a row, Taya is dressed like a drunk Miss America contestant... this woman's illusions of grandeur are killing me. Bret solemnly tells the girls their strengths and weaknesses in the competition. Bret loves that Jamie speaks the truth and rolls with the lifestyle, but he is worried that they're not looking for the same type of relationship. As for Taya, Bret loves that she strokes his ego but he can't figure out if she is here for love or love and business. Lastly, when it comes to Mindy Bret feels there is something real going on between them, but he's worried about her mood swings and "funks."
It's time for the first pass and it goes to...Mindy, thank god. Mindy is thrilled to get the first pass, especially since she knows that it must be freaking Taya out to no end. And Mindy is right, Taya is freaking out, she says she is breaking down and she can barely stand. So the bottom two is Jamie and Taya. Bret says his heart is pounding and that this is the toughest decision he has made. Oh please say that tough decision is kicking off Taya, I can't deal with the Botox Queen for one more second. Bret calls Jamie to him and for a moment I am thrilled, but then Bret breaks the bad news to all of us. "I am truly looking for a serious relationship, so there is no way I can let Taya go." Drat. However Bret tells Jamie she's been nothing but a beautiful, awesome, class act...which he definitely didn't say about most of the girls he eliminated.
So there we have it America, the final two women vying to be Bret Michaels' Rock of Love (the third): Mindy and Taya. To which I say, oh god, please choose Mindy. Taya's head might actually explode from smugness if she is chosen.
On Next Week's Rock of Love Bus Finale: Bret takes the final two girls to the Dominican Republic to make his decision. At elimination, Bret isn't holding a backstage pass for the winning girl, he's holding a ring.
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Abbey Simmons, BuddyTV Staff Writer