'Mistresses' Recap: Cupid Shuns Savi, Karen and April
'Mistresses' Recap: Cupid Shuns Savi, Karen and April
Catherine Cabanela
Catherine Cabanela
Contributing Writer, BuddyTV
Mistresses' third episode of the second season, "Open House," affirms what we dedicated viewers already knew: This show is one big saucy, juicy, hot mess of delicious entertainment. In a very good way, am I right ladies? Hot damn.

Within the confinements of a 60-minute time frame, we were dragged through numerous shocks to the system, a couple of ah hah moments and finally left with a great feel-good moment between April and Lucy. Yes, dragged. Why? Because we did not want that clock to advance. The saucy goodness went on and on and could have gone on another full hour and we would have been glued to the screen the whole time. That's good entertainment, folks. That's our Mistresses.

Stuff Happened Last Week, But Still No Mention of Savi's Baby

Last week, Savi went back to work part-time only to learn she was rooming with a new hot tamale who calls herself Toni (guest star Rebeka Montoya) who made it clear she wanted to eat Dom for dessert. Joss and Harry nightmarishly teamed up to cater a luxurious party which ended up being a smashing success. After a brief squabble, they truced and agreed they are both better off working together. 

Elsewhere, Karen had to face the release from the mental institution of Elizabeth "Psyco Bitch from Hell" Grey, the woman who killed Karen's lover and her own child last week. In the process, Karen faced her fears and seems to have recovered from last year's trauma once and for all. 

What didn't get discussed, yet again, was the pregnancy Savi was gestating at the end of last season. Would someone please tell me if I missed something crucial here? I didn't mention this omission in my recap of the season 2 premiere just in case it was my own brain that had managed to not notice this important piece of the plot or perhaps even -- gulp -- forgot about it. The time for being silent has passed. What the hell happened?! If you know, would you please mention it in the comments below? I'm sure I'm not the only befuddled viewer here.  

Lots of Trouble in Paradise This Week

In "Open House," Harry attempts to sell the house out from underneath Savi for a ridiculously low cash offer which forces the exes into a painful confrontation. Karen learns that Jacob (Matthew Del Negro), the lovely tall glass of water she used to work with, was interested in more than just her time card, so Karen decides it's time for her to dust off her diaphragm and get back out there. Elsewhere, April tries to fit in with the other posh parents at Lucy's private school by throwing a lavish beefcake party and learns that those other couples are nothing to be envious of. As a matter of fact, they are weird, weird, weird.

April Gets More Than She Bargained for from Her "Open House"

April endures her third day without communication from Daniel, the lusty artistic lover with the wonderful abs who has yet to demonstrate any IQ behind those beautiful eyes. Last week while Lucy was away, Daniel (yummy guest star Ricky Whittle) only exchanged a handful of sentences between love-making scenes. Okay, the making out was pretty hot, but this coupling rings hollow as there is no substance for us as viewers to invest in. They met, they made like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze in Ghost except with paints rather than a pottery wheel, and they bumped the uglies a million times. Then he went out of town.

Now this week, she's decided he's the only basket she wants to put her eggs in -- her eggs meaning her vagina --as is pointed out by BFF Mickey (guest star Joseph May). Kudos to Mistresses for almost including the word 'vagina' in their dialog. We're all big girls here, and we appreciate the nod to our righteous womanhood. #EnoughSaid.

As it turns out, one of the husbands (dads) at April's beefcake parents' party is much more interested in the shirtless men dappled in colorful paint than in his own wife. Then, to top it off, April accepts a coffee date with one of the fathers -- a date which turns out to be a major yawn -- only to discover that her "date" is the husband of Lucy's pouty school friend Peyton. No loss anyway, that guy was nowhere near sponge-worthy (thank you, Seinfeld).

In the end, April buys Lucy the coveted cell phone she'd wanted because all the other girls have them which actually seems like a great gift for the little girl who has a lot more going for her than those other pretenders at her school. Then guess what? April gets a text from Daniel. Hopefully, his abs -- er, his face -- will resurface for our delight next week.

Savi's Open House is All Screwed Up

At work, Savi and Dom have difficulty separating night life from their day jobs and it causes considerable friction when Harry tries to paint and then sell their house without even speaking to Savi. Savi has no choice but to abandon work and confront Harry. Dom is not pleased, but Toni certainly is. Remember that Toni played Peeping Tom last week and got an eyeful of Dom and Savi lip to lip last week, so she's on to them. Fishing for a confession, Toni baits Savi about going out as single women together (not as lesbians, she clarifies -- eye roll) and gets nowhere, but this little minx is definitely up to something. 

Later, Toni and her ballooning breasts corner Dom and make a wild pass at him to see what he'll do. He, of course, turns her down and we think she's just lost the battle. However, as her back is to Dom as she's leaving the room, we see a conniving sneer spread across her face. Something wicked this way comes, ladies. Mark my words. 

Harry tries desperately to avoid Savi, who eventually catches up to him and they have it out in a painful match of "who has been the bigger asshat who caused the demise of our relationship?" There are no winners in this kind of argument. Both of them are at fault. They both failed each other and their marriage. It's a painful conversation during which Harry tearily admits he's trying to get rid of Savi. For a split moment, it looks like they just might rip each other's clothes off and go at it (or is that my imagination?) but they don't. We're all glad because that would just be sad and wrong at this point.

However -- and here's the zinger, folks -- at the end of the episode, Savi has sold the house so she can move on. The zinger is that Dom calls her from his office where it's insinuated that he may be planning to log a couple of hours with that Toni tamale who offered herself to him earlier in the episode. Was it the music, his pregnant pause or just the need for a little more spice in this story arc that had me thinking that? What are your thoughts?

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Karen Puts It Out There and Gets Shot Down

Karen learns Jacob was interested in her, but does nothing about it. Then she calls that gorgeous hot chocolate hunk of manhood from work whose name I cannot remember. Anyway, they go out on a date which ends up being a yawner. Bummer, right? That's not all. Karen musters the ovaries to call Jacob and ask him out only to be turned down. It's painful and awkward, but you know what? She's moving forward, which is exactly what she needs to do. Move forward, and we applaud her for that. Especially since neither the gorgeous man from the emergency room nor Jacob is her patient.

So what wil happen next week? Oh -- almost forgot! Some weird guy shows up at Savi's house saying they have something important to discuss right before the curtain falls on this week's installment. What is that all about? For a moment, I thought he was going to attack her. Man, this woman does not need that. So I guess we'll have to wait and see like the rest of the world -- right, ladies? Like I said: hot, saucy, juicy; that's our Mistresses and the only thing it fails at is disappointing us. Right, they fail to disappoint. See you next week!

Mistresses airs Mondays at 10pm on ABC.

(Image courtesy of ABC)