'Gossip Girl' Awesome Quotes: 'Rhodes to Perdition'
'Gossip Girl' Awesome Quotes: 'Rhodes to Perdition'
This week's Gossip Girl episode taught us never to underestimate the people in our lives because we may soon regret it. Serena underestimated her affinity for stalkers and blackmailers and wound up with a tiny bit of a broken heart, just as Max underestimated his ex-girlfriend Ivy's street savvy and wound up $500,000 poorer than last week. Blair underestimated how much it took for Chuck to let her go and found herself once more torn between her old love and her new one, while Dan underestimated his own insecurities about Inside and found himself waging twitter-war with his own publicist. Meanwhile, everyone in the viewing audience underestimated Nate's basic brain functions and was in for a pleasant surprise when he outwitted his entire family and still maintained his integrity. 

Season 5, episode 9 ("Rhodes To Perdition") reminded us that even those who love us most don't always know everything about us - Nate's family didn't know he was someone worthy of their respect and Charlie's family doesn't even know she's a stranger - and that sometimes we have to rely on what we know about ourselves to get us through. Tonight's best quotes were full of lies and truths, which we've come to expect from our favorite teen drama. The one thing we didn't expect, though, was just how many of those lies were filled with good intentions.

#10. Cece Rhodes: "I am going to wear that platinum jumpsuit that prompted Ryan O'Neal to propose. Now that he's a widower, I put him on the guest list."

- This woman takes cougar to a whole new level, and the world is a better place for it!

#9. Serena van der Woodsen: "Could we cover ourselves in flour and lick spoons and do other cute things?"

- Poor Serena just wants to meet a cute boy and do cute things! Why does she keep picking up guys after her money or best friend or fake cousin instead?

#8. Dorota (about Louis): "Maybe he Freaky Friday with Mr. Chuck? They struck by lightning at same time or pee in the same fountain?"

- We all know that Dorota can tell what's going on in Blair's mind more than anyone else, but who knew that she also loved Jason Bateman movies?

#7. Max (to Charlie/Ivy Rhodes): "Don't worry. I'm not going to risk a lifetime of financial security for brunch with the in-laws." 

- It's so cute that Max thinks $500,000 is a lifetime of financial security. That's how you know he wasn't born on the Upper East Side.

#6. Chivy (to Serena): "I just don't want to see you revert back to Old Serena's taste in men."
Serena: "Ugh, Max could not be further from the men I've dated."

- Oh, Serena. When are you ever going to learn? If a guy is dating you, there's something wrong with him. 

#5. Blair Waldorf: "Care to share how you gave up your bad Bass ways? How you went from Charlie Sheen to Charlie Brown? From Bar to Mitzvah?'"

- Pop culture references and a reminder of Chuck and Blair 's last heady tryst, both rolled into one genuine plea to understand her new ex-lover? Blair always knows how to pack a good punch.

#4. Dan Humphrey: "Don't worry, I'm not a stalker. In fact, the person I'm looking for is the stalker. An anonymous one. The worst kind."

- Dan's ramblings take us back to the early days when he just happened to follow Serena around because her shiny hair distracted him and not because he was, you know, a stalker.

#3. Serena (after Cece faints): "Once we get Grandma something to eat and make sure she's okay, Charlie can get back to telling us everything."

- It's good to know that, no matter how much Serena has grown, she always thinks of herself first. But we still love you, S!

#2. William Vanderbilt: "You're your own man, Nathaniel. I've always loved you, but now I respect you, too."

- This moment managed to be both a remarkably sweet one between Nate and his grandfather, but also very telling of how much growing our favorite Archibald has been doing while we were all too busy watching Blair fend off the many men that love her.

#1. Sylvia Weinstock: "I see the groom is here, too."
Chuck: "I'm not the groom."

- Oh, come on, GG! Chuck is going to end up being the groom, isn't he? Don't toy with me now!

Tatiana del Pilar
Fan Columnist

(Image courtesy of The CW)