Tonight's Gossip Girl was full of family - from the backstabbing kind to the secret-keeping kind to the kind that unexpectedly turns up to be a little closer than you once thought. Chuck finds out his uncle just might be his father, while Serena finds out her father might be her uncle. Confused much? The only one who wasn't confused was Nate, who uncovered every truth there was and divulged it to the appropriate parties. Sherlock Archibald may be the best thing about the season.
"Despicable B" also had quite a bit of its namesake, of course, what with Blair worried that even Dan's spotlight was shining brighter than hers. She eventually realized she had just lost herself and needed some help being found, though. Much like Rufus realized he had lost the thread of his relationship with Lily long ago and needed time apart after her latest scheme to put her sister in jail. And poor Ivy desperately tried to make her way back into the van der Woodsen clan, but Lily doesn't have any compassion left in her. Tonight's best quotes show how each of the characters grappled with the various takes on family and self-discovery:
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#10. Blair: "Dan, you know you're never going to be trending on Twitter with those topics."
- Gossip Girl is so hip! Blair even knows about Twitter.
#9. Nate (to Diana): "Every time I look at you now, I see a Bass in my face."
- So many homoerotic jokes running through all our minds right now...
#8. Blair: "I love reading bad things about my friends. It's the only thing that makes me feel good about myself."
- I think we've all been there before.
#7. Gossip Girl: "I've always been a daddy's girl, but the problem with fathers is that they can be real sons of bitches."
- NICE! Once of the few good one-liners GG has had all season.
#6. Nate (to Serena): "[Lola's] goin through some thing, unrelated to you..."
- Just related to your father. DRAMATIC IRONY!
#5. Diana: "If you wanted to see my underwear, all you had to do was ask."
- Given this woman's history, it doesn't sound like asking is even required...
#4. William: "Serena, you look beautiful."
Serena: "Oh, thanks. I get it from my mom."
- Serena was full of snappy one-liners today! Being GG has clearly improved her wit.
#3. Dan: "I have a feeling that the real Blair Waldorf is a lot closer than you think."
And we see her in next week's promo!
#2. Serena (to William): "All you did was avoid me. And now you rush to be by her side. Well you broke my mom's heart. And now you've broken mine."
- I think 'Poor Serena' about sums it up.
#1. Lily (to Rufus): "Where are you going to find another UES woman to take care of you the way I have?"
- Had to be number one because, man. Burn on Rufus. Lily might be wrong, but isn't it fun to see her get crazy?
Tatiana del Pilar
(Image courtesy of The CW)