Previously on Dirty Sexy Money: Karen slept with Simon Elder. Jeremy convinced Sofia he's a struggling artist, and Nick's wife Lisa agreed to help him. Letitia revealed that Reverend Brian is Nick's biological half-brother.

Jeremy (Seth Gabel) and Sofia are spending some quality post-coital naked time in the rundown loft he's renting, and she's eager for him to paint her.  Patrick (William Baldwin) is also post-coital, surprisingly with his wife Ellen.  He promises no more lies and no more Carmelita.  Then he gets a phone call from Carmelita, who thinks she's being followed, so Patrick rushes over.

In the George bed, Lisa (Zoe McLellan) is spending time going over her Jeremy Plan, getting an artist to draw Sofia in several stages so Jeremy can fake being a painter.  Nick (Peter Krause) gets a call from Simon (Blair Underwood), who is in bed with Karen (Natalie Zea), who agrees to skip the annual Darling Nutcracker performance to meet someone special in his life.  At their meeting, Simon asks Nick to get him a list of all the Darling family holdings, then tells him about sleeping with Karen.  Nick is very uneasy, but accepting, and he goes to Tripp  (Donald Sutherland) who thinks they should give the information to Simon.  When Karen drops off the documents, Nick tells her he knows about her and Simon.

Tripp visits his not-son Brian (Glenn Fitzgerald) , vowing to forge a relationship with him despite not being related.  Reverend Brian then goes to meet with the head of his church, who suspends him for six months for having an affair with a parishioner, an illegitimate son, and bribing a government official.  Brian must attend sex addiction counseling and several workshops.

At a family meal, Karen tells Letitia (Jill Clayburgh) she's not coming to the Nutcracker, while Juliet (Samaire Armstrong) is going off on some crazy spiritual nonsense.  The subject turns to Brian, and he shows up and snarks at his mom.  Later, Letitia tries to talk her son into finding his way back to the church, and it's sweet, until we see during this whole conversation Brian has been soaking his feet in a massage bath.  After reflection, Brian comes to Tripp and says God told him to work for Darling Enterprises.  Meanwhile, Juliet greets some Frenchman she met when she took Karen's honeymoon.

Karen goes to dinner with Simon and meets the Princess, aka Simon's wife.  The Princess is sweet and very spiritual, and she and Simon have this supremely weird, loving relationship.  The Princess approves of Karen.

Patrick visits Carmelita and vows to have someone protect her.  He sends over Clark, the limo driver, who is again the most dependable man on Earth, willing to do anything.  That night, Carmelita sees her door ajar, and goes to investigate.  The next morning, Clark finds Carmelita missing and calls up Patrick. 

Lisa takes Jeremy to the gallery and teaches him about appreciating art as he mocks a $150,000 giant sponge.  The other artist flakes out, and Jeremy wants to use Lisa as a model for him to take a stab at painting himself.  She's unwilling, so Jeremy wants to get her high to she can chillax.  They get stoned and have a nice bonding moment where Lisa encourages Jeremy to just be himself, because he's a crappy painter.  Lisa has a moment of clarity that she's losing Nick because he's always with the Darlings.  Jeremy tells her not to worry, because she's great.  He sits on her lap and goes in for a kiss, which Lisa quickly warns him against doing again.  The next day when the sponge buyer shows up, she claims it reeks of pot, and when she refuses to buy it, Lisa is fired.

At the Darling mansion, they're having a private production of the Nutcracker in their living room.  Nick's daughter is amazed and wants to marry into the Darling family.  Juliet's Frenchman is also impressed.  Karen arrives, upset and weirded out by her date.

The next day, Nick confronts Simon and tells him to stay away from Karen because she was so upset.  Simon agrees, then Nick hands him the documents.  Nick returns home to find out his wife was fired.  She tells him what happened, and Nick takes it with a grain of salt.  In fact, since she has all this free time, Nick decides they should have another kid. 

Jeremy goes to Sofia and tells her he lied about everything.  He tells her the truth, desperate for her to love him for who he is, and Sofia is upset that he lied to her, so she leaves.  As was inevitable.  His twin sister Juliet is getting the opposite news, as her Frenchman vows to stay in New York because he loves her.  She decides that she wants to lose her virginity to him.

In the end, Tripp and Karen have a meeting.  Apparently, her sleeping with Simon was part of some master Darling plan!  And sadly, that's all the new Dirty Sexy Money until sometime in January, when I believe they still have three episodes left before running out because of the strike.


-John Kubicek, BuddyTV Senior Writer
(Image courtesy of ABC)