'Dancing with the Stars' Results: Week 1
'Dancing with the Stars' Results: Week 1
Laurel Brown
Laurel Brown
Senior Writer, BuddyTV
The first week of Dancing with the Stars performances is over. The celebrities have shown us what they can do (for now). Scores have been received. And the voters have done their voting thing.

Now it's time to see those votes in action! Tonight, one of this season's 12 celebrities will be eliminated and sent packing. The other 11 contenders will continue on -- but not before a couple of hours of Results Show mania.

Who did you pick for elimination?
BuddyTV fans have spoken. A whopping 45 percent of you picked Margaret Cho and partner Louis Van Amstel as the first to go home. Trailing the losing couple are Michael Bolton and Chelsie Hightower, the first choices for last place according to 27 percent of BuddyTV fans. The Situation and David Hasselhoff received 14 percent of the vote apiece, placing both in danger of elimination as well.

On this site, at least, the rest of the competitors are safe. I'm sure they'll be happy to hear that.

Just want to find out how it all ends?
If you missed last night's premiere broadcast, the live episode recap can help fill in some of the details for you. Or we can just touch on the highlights and lowlights here.

Even thought it was only the first night, we still got surprises - both good and bad. Turns out that stars Kyle Massey and Audrina Patridge can dance. David Hasselhoff and The Situation, on the other hand, not so much. Bristol Palin gratified some and surprised others by showing potential for improvement on the dance floor.

A three-way tie between Margaret Cho, David Hasselhoff and The Situation landed those celebrities in dangerous bottom territory. It would seem that injecting humor, relying only on presence and missing rehearsal do not make for high scores. Who would have guessed?

Meanwhile, we have some early leaders. Jennifer Grey, Brandy, Kyle Massey and Rick Fox all achieved scores above 20, accompanied by much judge adulation and fan applause.
Excitement from last night aside, what really matters now is...

The live Results Show!
With musical performances from Santana, Daughtry and India.Arie.

But first, a repeat of last night's dances, complete with judge commentary and reflection. In which we find out, among other juicy tidbits:
  • Rick Fox and Kyle Massey might end up in a fight over Carrie Ann Inaba. Now that would be entertaining!
  • Maksim Chmerkovskiy says "Brandy" in a way that makes her happy.
  • Florence Henderson has the ability to make male ballroom dancers uncomfortable.
  • The Situation doesn't realize that Superwoman would totally kick his butt.
  • Jennifer Grey talks about bottled emotions in a way that sounds vaguely like a disturbing medical condition.
  • There may be even more flames when the Hoff goes "Hoff to glory."

And we're live now!
The loser surprised "even the producers?" Interesting... Or possibly just a ploy to keep us glued to our TV.

Even without that ploy, the countdown and tense music definitely raises the emotional quota here.

Santana Plays for the Professionals
Seems like it will be "Oye Como Va" (officially the only classic Santana song I can recognize, thank goodness) for the first exhibition dance of the evening. Kind of cool to watch professional dancing (choreographed by Maksim Chmerkovskiy) to a song that demands motion. Ooh, shimmying!

Adam Corolla is a "cherry on the top?" OK.

The four lowest-scoring couples come out on stage and... Michael and Chelsie are safe? Wow. Good on them!

And the next couple that is safe... Margaret and Louis? Seriously? Seriously?!?!?

OK, so this means that the two cool guys of the show, David Hasselhoff and The Situation, are in danger of immediate elimination! Did not see that coming.

Of course, we will not have closure on this incredible moment of exhilarating stress for approximately 45 more minutes. Sigh...

Premiere10.jpgEnough of that
Off to more filler. We now get Adam Corolla on a unicycle. Why a unicycle? Don't ask -- there are mysteries that should be left unknown.

Anyway, his purpose is to explore the origins of the dances used on DWTS. There's some actual history in there. Not much, but a little. I did not know the quick-step was English.

Hey it's a green-screen! I knew he didn't really unicycle to Brazil.

Daughtry performs
With no dancers? Oh no, there they are. Not sure if they were late or if the camera was too in love with Daughtry to film them. They may be gone now, but it's hard to say. Let's just look at Daughtry some more.

Backstage with Brooke and the Four Highest-Scorers
Oh wait, I didn't think about the highest-scoring people still being on the chopping block! If voters send home Kyle Massey after that dance, I will protest strongly. Very strongly.

Four Highest-Scoring Couples on Stage
"It's never too early to panic" - Len (words to live by)
Len is very happy with the overall quality of the show. That's nice.

And Jennifer and Derek are safe! In other news, water is wet.

Rick and Cheryl are also safe, no matter what the make, no make-off, no make-up helped.

This means that Kyle and Brandy both remain in danger of leaving the show. This does not please me. No, this does not please me at all.

More Santana, this time with India.Arie
"While My Guitar Gently Weeps" is this number. Very pretty song. But no dancers yet. Oh no, there they are! Very pretty dancing too.

Backstage with the Middle Four Couples
Where Florence Henderson is having trouble expressing exactly how much fun she's having. It's a lot. That much I'm sure of. To abruptly change the subject, if DWTS wants to separate Bristol Palin from her mother, they might want to stop mentioning her every five minutes.

Hey, there's booze in the balcony!

The celebrities are all amusingly enamored with each other. As they say:

"I think me and The Situation may be the most random cast members." - Kyle Massey

"Can I see your Situation?" - Florence Henderson

"Alaska to Cali? I mean, I didn't even know there were roads to connect that." - The Situation

Looks like Audrina and Tony are safe! Cool. They deserve it.

Also safe from this group, Florence (who took a moment to process that) and Corky.

Which means that Bristol and Kurt will be up on the chopping block soon.

Before the end arrives, however, it's time for another...

Santana Performance
...This time with Daughtry.

Not a bad song. But definitely not as pretty as the last one.

The Pros Talk About the Pressure
Yes, losing would suck a lot for a professional dancer. Especially if you lose right away. And I suppose they can't totally blame the celebrity on the air.

Just one more commercial (I hope -- they can't fit anymore in, can they?) until the final results!

Also, some Better with You stars in the audience.

Also also, more backstage interviews. Where are the results?!?

Brandy and Maksim are safe! Brandy may not recover from that good news.

Bristol and Mark are also safe! Which leaves four couples still worried...

Commercials??? Not fair, show. Not fair.

How about now, RESULTS?
Yep, looks like the results.

The next safe couple is Kurt and Anna.

Along with The Situation and Karina! Guess they did want to give him rehearsal time.

That leaves us with David Hasselhoff and Kyle Massey. Not that we get to find out which right away. Oh no, we have to talk to Kyle's family for awhile first. And now on to the Hasselhoff girls, who are mostly proud that dad's knees didn't give out.

And the last safe couple is... Kyle and Lacey!

Which means that the first-eliminated couple is David and Kym!

Wow, that's a shocker -- I thought we'd keep him around for awhile.

David: "It's been a great ride!"Premiere01.jpg

A final dance from the Hoff and Kym closes out this first Results Show. Can't say the guy isn't a good sport about this! Bye Hoff! You'll be missed! (But not for the dancing. That wasn't so good.)

So what do you think about the results? Did the Hoff deserve to go home so soon? Or did you expect someone else to go? Leave comments and vote in the poll -- make your opinion known! 

(Images courtesy of ABC)