Your Changing Body: A Pamphlet for Ramona Singer
Your Changing Body: A Pamphlet for Ramona Singer
Your body is going through a change! You may notice that you have bigger boobies, you feel tired when you visit your friend's townhouse, you lack your usual interest in Pinot Grigio. This is all normal. Every woman goes through it. Fortunately, there are steps you can take to find out what's going on:

1. Tell a lot of people you might be pregnant. Just go with your gut on this one, don't think about it too much.

2. Show off those boobs! Insist they look bigger. Leopard print suits everyone.

3. OK fine, take an actual pregnancy test. Drink a lot of water first. It has been proven that pregnancy test results are MORE ACCURATE when taken on a yacht, so don't delay!

4. Act suspicious at your friend's anniversary party. This is about YOU, don't let Natalie Cole steal your thunder.

5. Even if you find out you're not pregnant, keep the mystery alive! You'll get your period, you just have to. Women don't just STOP having their periods at a certain age ... right?

6. It's not menopause. It's just not.

7. Talk about your period/uterus a lot more than you have to, just to get the point across that you still COULD have a baby if you wanted to.

8. If you're not pregnant, there is always an upside. At least you can drink a bottle of wine a day, and at least it's not menopause.

9. It might be menopause.

10. Take a pregnancy test again, maybe it didn't work because you didn't drink enough water. The dogs thought you were pregnant! They can smell the baby ...


(image courtesy of Bravo)