'The Real Housewives of Atlanta' Recap: Get Some Culture
'The Real Housewives of Atlanta' Recap: Get Some Culture
It's time for the obligatory "she's got a gun!" scene of The Real Housewives. Kroy and Kim go gun shopping, and Kim is delightfully skilled at firing a gun. Well, you know the saying: have a baby, buy a gun. Is it weird that this made me want a little pink gun? That simulator looked so fun!

Cynthia, Peter, Phaedra, and Apollo go on a double date. Despite the husbands' bow-up at Kim's baby shower, it goes well. Phaedra and Apollo seem like they'd be fun to hang out with, and Peter just sucks. I don't know, I don't really understand his appeal. For the obligatory Big Trip of the season, Phaedra is organizing a trip to South Africa. This episode is just getting a lot of mile markers out of the way. No wonder NeNe is totally over it.

Remember that creepy weird-date Italian guy NeNe is business partnering with? Donald Trump introduced them! Of course. He and NeNe are working on a lounge or something. NeNe says she wants it to be "absolutely fabulous" and the white guy in the checked shirt nodded. He put together some pictures. Then John gave her some Louboutins.

Kandi is looking to shape up her donkey booty, and Phaedra is preparing for South Africa, so the two go to an African dance class. Phaedra is so much fun! Why didn't we know this before? After class, Kandi gets to the main event: Marlo's 7 mug shots. And honey, those mug shots don't look like the Marlo we have come to know this season. She looks aggravated and assault-ish.

Kim met with her psychic/palm reader, Rose, who correctly predicted all three children. Rose is very matter-of-fact and I would love her to read my hand. She tells Kim that she'll be pregnant again but not full term, and that Kroy is the forever marriage guy. Kroy has anxiety, and KJ will not marry young. She read the baby's hand!!

Phaedra is just immersing herself in African culture, by next going to the African History Museum with Sheree. She had to check out the mannequin's junk, of course, but then they actually learned a thing or two. The museum guide tried to tell them about how the slaves were degraded and stripped, by Phaedra and Sheree couldn't stop looking at that sexy mannequin. They even high-fived.

The Housewives, ALL of them, are meeting in one room for Mama Joyce's dinner. And this time, Ridickulous will not be sticking his penis in anyone's drink. Is everyone going to Africa or not? I'm guessing NeNe isn't, which means Sheree is. Anyway, NeNe isn't talking to Sheree or Kim. It's a little tense. Joyce says she wants everyone to get along, and I'm with her. It was so much fun when NeNe and Kim were friends!

Joyce straight up called them out for being petty, but they are pretending like she's not talking. Where is Phaedra?? Joyce tells them to get over it and say hi to each other. NeNe is being FROSTY. Joyce did her best. The 'wives tell Joyce that they are not interested in being friends anymore. BOOOOO. I want them all to be friends because, as fun as the drama is, it's funnier when they're getting along.

Joyce asks NeNe if she doesn't think she could ever be friends with Kim again, and NeNe doesn't even answer (that we can tell from this Hills-like editing), then says no. NeNe is stubborn. I hate that. It's really sad, and it seems like NeNe won't be back for the next season. Then, in the end, Mama Joyce realizes she has been drinking by accident.

Next week, everyone leaves for Africa, including NeNe and Marlo. Ooooooh!

(images courtesy of Bravo)