Although last night's episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta
itself was not a disappointment, it was full of disappointment. Who's to blame? Let's review some things that didn't go over as planned.
Sheree buys a new Aston Martin for herself
Who's Disappointed: Her kids. Maybe jealous is a better word. You know who's not disappointed, though? Sheree. She's doing stuff for herself and living out loud! We'll worry about finances later. Bonus disappointee: the guy who had to open Sheree's door for her at the Atlanta's Dancing Stars event.
Kim re-decorates her office and her daughter Ariana's bedroom
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Who's disappointed: Kim's other daughter Brielle. Brielle, who has the entire third floor of the house, complains that her room looks like it's for a five-year old and she's over it. Another $60,000 or more down the hole!
Peter proposes to Cynthia in front of all their friends.
Who's disappointed: Cynthia and all their friends. Cynthia wanted a more intimate proposal, and her friends wanted a bigger reaction. To boot, I was a little disappointed in Peter's proposal. It seemed more like a legal proposition than anything.
Phaedra doesn't know how to prepare for having a baby.
Who's disappointed: the world. You don't get to have a luxurious, silken birth, Phaedra. All I know about having a baby is the episode of Full House where Rebecca gives birth to the twins on Wake Up, San Francisco and even I know you won't be wearing cute little dresses. And what was up with that 50-cent piece belly band remedy? Can someone explain that to me? Who's not disappointed: the founders of Penis Ointment, Inc. You can't buy product placement this good.
Sheree's dance practice isn't going well.
Who's disappointed: Dancing Stars of Atlanta judge Michael. This is Dancing Stars of Atlanta! He has a reputation to uphold! He even brought in rhumba expert Virginia, to work on Sheree's top line, but Sheree just got annoyed.
The other Housewives pitch in $20 each for Sheree.
Who's disappointed: Sheree. She expected at least a couple hundred dollars from each of them, but she never asked any of them for a donation. Sheree does not beg!
Sheree dances a lackluster rhumba.
Who's disappointed: anyone who donated under Sheree's name. Basically everyone's faces looked like this:
But the winners of the episode were Lawrence and Kroy Biermann's ass, who didn't disappoint anyone.
(images courtesy of Bravo)