Welcome to The GBU, a weekly column coming every Monday where I look at the Good, the Bad and the Ugly on TV.
Everybody loves a royal wedding. Whether it's done for love or to
consolidate power, royal weddings are ornate affairs full of decadence.
With the impending nuptials of Prince William and Kate Middleton, TV has
been abuzz with royal wedding coverage, but there have also been plenty
of scripted shows that take advantage of the excitement.
Here's the Good, the Bad and the Ugly of royal weddings on TV.The Good: William and Kate
A British royal wedding is a lot like the World Cup, mostly because it's the one time when Americans pretend to be excited about something only Europeans really care about. Based on the amount of coverage William and Kate's wedding is getting in the U.S., you'd think Charlie Sheen was getting married to one of Tiger Woods' mistresses. Still, with a Lifetime original movie
, it's hard not to be enthralled by the prospect of great, soapy love. The only way this could get any better is if the actual royal wedding stole a move or two from this T-Mobile commercial.
The Bad: Lucrezia's Wedding on The Borgias
When the Pop married off his daughter to a powerful lord, the wedding was pure debauchery, with a lewd play, too much food and even an appearance by the disgraced mother of the bride. It was a disgusting display of decadence worthy of this horrendous family. The only thing worse than the actual wedding was the honeymoon, when Giovanni Sforza brutally and forcibly consummated the union.The Ugly: Game of Thrones
The premiere of HBO's Game of Thrones
featured the former princess being married off to Khal Drogo, a warlord of the Dothrakians. Not only did Daenerys Targaryen want nothing to do with her brute of a husband, but the reception featured Dothraki rituals like live snakes, rotted meats covered in flies and at least three deaths which followed public sex. And then Khal Drogo took his new bride to the cliffs to have his way with her. The only thing more disturbing than the actual wedding ceremony was the fact that Game of Thrones
found a way to make the incredibly hot Jason Momoa (Baywatch
, Stargate Atlantis
and the upcoming Conan the Barbarian
remake) look disgusting as Drogo.(Images courtesy of Lifetime, Showtime and HBO)