Previously: Spoilers Part One, Spoilers Part Two.

OK, you guys. I went to see Titanic 3D last night (WITHHOLD JUDGMENT PLEASE, my inner middle schooler can't take it) and in the midst of regretting my $15 rental of a pair of plastic transition lenses so that I could see Billy Zane's Flajnik-like center part in three dimensions, something occurred to me that probably already occurred to many of you as you watched Emily, Ali and Ashley go see Titanic 3D in the theater in that special Bachelorette teaser: Uhhhhhhh, didn't Emily already lose the love of her life in a tragic transportation accident? Isn't it a little (no, a lot) insensitive of ABC to send her to the theater to watch the tale of a woman who must go on after her prince has perished, and to say things like "I want a love like theirs" when she ALREADY HAD A LOVE LIKE THEIRS but then he died and that's how she ended up on The Bachelor?

Anyway, I guess what I'm saying (again) is that this show is shameless, and sometimes it's a fine line between loving that shamelessness and hating that shamelessness and wishing that shamelessness could at least refrain from slightly tarnishing your 15 year long love for a fictional character named Jack Dawson. (He really does shine up like a new penny, Kathy Bates. A NPILF.) But we can save those conflicting emotions for when The Bachelorette begins airing in May. Until then, here's what's new in our exciting game of Where in the World is Emily Maynard and Her Gaggle of Muscled Suitors?:

More Confirmed Contestants (courtesy of Reality Steve):

Meet Shawn: He's 28, from Texas, and an insurance agent who OH MY GOD LOOK AT HIS ABS. Now look at them again. I don't need to hear him speak to know that he seems like marriage material.

Meet Nathan: He's 25, from Los Angeles, and I think is the guy on the right.

Meet David: He's from New York, is a musician with a website that you can visit here, and also owns a prominent set of abs.

Meet John: He owns a shredding company with his dad and likes golf and probably won't last very long since all his photos have his shirt on, but he's handsome so you never know, you know?

More Locations and Dates:

Bermuda: Emily and some of the guys had a boat race, and they put her in short-shorts even though it was clearly freezing. Here are lots of photos of that.

Jolly Ol' England: From Bermuda, the cast and crew flew to Toronto (but only long enough to visit the airport, apparently) and then on to Stratford, England -- the hometown of a little known poet-playwright named William Shakespeare. So obviously, one of the group dates centered around recreated a scene from Romeo & Juliet. (You know The Bachelor, always appreciating and celebrating and not at all blaspheming upon great works of literature!) Blogs the bystander who posted this photo of the embarrassing display: "one poor guy had to blow the trumpet with the flag on it and was having great difficulty." Haha. Judging by the fact that some of the other men were clearly put in dresses, I'm guessing that wasn't an accident.

Reality Steve says the cast also visited Leeds, but no leads (*WINK*) on what they did there. Yet.

Croatia and Madrid: RS says that the cast is now in Croatia, and will likely visit the capital of Spain next. That's Emily looking tough on the streets of Dubrovnik, Croatia up there in the main photo.

Premiere Notes:

The Bachelorette premieres May 14, and ABC announced yesterday that Bachelor Pad 3 officially premieres July 23. (But why not let us do the remembering for you? Download the BuddyTV Guide App and set alerts for new episodes sent straight to your phone!)



(Image courtesy of dulist)