Everybody hates Chris, and he's Public Enemy No. 1. He might as well have his bags packed because his departure seems to be all but guaranteed.
Of course, it's easier said than done. Look at last week
, when it seemed a sure thing he would get the boot. A twist helped him survive. Will the season 3 villain be so lucky again and get another chance to stay?
As for the rest of the contestants, how's Rachel doing without her
two-week boyfriend, Michael? How will Jaclyn react when Ed tells her about a girl from home?
With the players now playing as couples -- meaning they vote together and get eliminated together -- which two are going home next?
Read on to find out all the answers from this week's episode!
How Do You Spell ... Spelling?
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A giant, yellow school bus (no short buses for these contestants) takes the crew to a performing arts center, where they take part in the first Bachelor Pad spelling bee!
The excitement I'm showing is forced. It's about as interesting as watching my nails grow -- they went from gymnastics
and hot sludge funday
to now spelling love, kiss and sexy?
But thanks to Chris and Sarah's fates being on the line, the tension is so thick -- and I find myself rooting for the underdogs.
How do you spell ... is this game fixed?
The couples have to spell the word they're given by alternating each letter. I have to admit that does seem to make it a little tougher. Couples with three strikes are eliminated.
If anyone's sweating, it's Tony. He doesn't even know how to spell 'spelling,' he says.
Kalon is pretty horrible, as he's the one who makes a mistake in each turn, and him and Lindzi are the first ones out. Then it's Nick and Rachel who are out.
By the time they reach Round 9, the two couples left standing are Ed and Jaclyn (no strikes) and Sarah and Chris (one strike).
The funniest moment is Ed spelling 'cockamamie' as 'cockamay.'
If Sarah and Chris get their next word correct, they win. And the word is: serendipity.
Last week, I mentioned how it was extremely convenient that a twist saved Chris. And I can't believe he gets a word that's 1,000,000% more easy to spell than cockamamie.
What they should've done is given both couples the same word to spell before revealing who got it correct. I think I can guarantee that Ed and Jaclyn could've spelled 'serendipity' the way Chris and Sarah could not have spelled 'cockamamie.'
And Chris' butt is saved, yet again! Am I sensing a pattern here? I'm more skeptical now than I was last week. I'm onto you, Bachelor Pad producers.
Blakeley immediately starts crying. No one congratulates them after their win. It's a good thing their date is right after the competition.
Date No. 1: Rustic Charms in a Barn
For their victory, not only do Chris and Sarah get a rose, they get a date, traveling on a train going "two miles an hour," according to Chris as they go through beautiful wine country before settling in a barn.
I can't exactly tell if what Chris and Sarah have is real. I'm leaning toward no.
I don't see much chemistry between them as I did, say, with Chris and Emily. Chris just digs Sarah at this point because she's fun, cool and easygoing -- the complete opposites of dominating Blakeley and clingy Jamie.
Chris brings up Emily -- there's a a new drinking game, for every time he brings her up -- saying he doesn't think much about her when he's with Sarah, and that it helps him heal just talking about it.
And this is where I continue my weekly confliction over Chris: Was all that he went through with Jamie and Blakeley just him acting out as he tried to get over getting his heart broken? Is he genuinely nice? Will the real Chris Bukowski please stand up?
Date No. 2: Awkward. Period.
For finishing second in the competition, Ed and Jaclyn also get an overnight date. During the last rose ceremony, we saw Ed pretty much dismiss his and Jaclyn's "relationship," saying they don't have one.
But all along, they've shared the same bed together, they do everything together -- and Jaclyn has started to develop feelings for Ed.
Well, this is when Ed decides to fill Jaclyn in over the fact that he has someone back home. But he's quick to add that he came on the show broken up and single, but that he obviously still has feelings that haven't gone away just because he came on the show.
Thump. That's the sound of Jaclyn's heart dropping. Ugh.
You guys, if you ever think Chris is a huge jerk or that Kalon is an awful manipulator, know that Ed will ALWAYS trump both of them in the douchebag department. He's on his own level.
Jaclyn tells Ed if she'd known that he had someone back home, she would not have acted the way she did (duh!). Ed's defense is that he told Sarah in the beginning before those two had hooked up, so he assumed that the word had traveled to Jaclyn.
Well, it didn't. I find it unbelievable that these two have spent as much time as they have together, and not once did Ed feel the need to bring up someone he has feelings for while he's hooking up with someone else.
I want to take the rose that he has and stab the thorns at him to wherever it'll hurt him the most.
I have to hand it to Jaclyn. I'm surprised with how easily it apparently is for her to cast her feelings aside. Is it because, unlike bawling Rachel, she can separate the game from her feelings? She knows if she makes a huge deal about this, it could hurt her game, and she doesn't want to ruin what is a solid partnership over her silly, little heart. Just that little thing.
I don't know how, but she gathers enough strength to not punch Ed in the face and instead "goes with the flow," which is shown as the two of them spend the overnight date together, aka, hooking up again.
And then I just feel sad for her. He's clearly using her. She obviously knows that, but she apparently doesn't seem to care -- or want to care.
When Jaclyn and Ed return to the mansion, they're given two roses to hand out to a couple, and they select Blakeley and Tony, saving them from the wrath named Chris.
The Grieving Widow
When Rachel, in hysterics, wanted to leave after the last rose ceremony, I wish she just had because then we'd all be spared this week.
She's still crying, still threatening to leave. Goooo! If you can't pull yourself together because your boyfriend of, what, two weeks -- if that -- leaves, then I don't know, maybe you should rethink your life.
Rachel, Jaclyn and Blakeley have a pow-wow about Rachel staying, with Jaclyn saying Michael would want her to stay, and blah, blah, blah.
These are Jaclyn's girls, and they're going to fight to the end -- girl power! They even pinkie swear, and Jaclyn kisses their hands.
Kalon/Lindzi vs. Rachel/Nick
Kalon, knowing he and Lindzi are at risk of going home, plant a seed with Blakeley and Tony to try and get Rachel and Nick out.
It's understandable. I mean, put Rachel out of her misery. She actually calls Michael during the night of the rose ceremony, which immediately makes me wonder: whose phone is that? How did she get his number? How many times does she call before getting through?
And Nick? Nice to join us for the season! Should two people just thrown together get to stay over an actual couple who want to win?
Logic says no, but Bachelor Pad says yes. Because Rachel is BFFs with Jaclyn, and there's no way she's betraying her.
So as much as the episode tries to show this tension over who would be going home, there isn't any doubt in my mind it's going to be Lindzi and Kalon.
And with that, the mansion's super couple are sent home. There's even a cute moment where they leave in different limos, but Kalon stops his and gets into Lindzi's.
While it's great those two got together, their partnership ultimately led to their demise. It was made to believe that the two of them spent all of their time together instead of with the rest of the house, which made them to be outsiders.
I still wished Lindzi, at least, was featured more. But wasn't that her problem on her season of The Bachelor? She stayed away from the drama, which meant she wasn't involved in any of the memorable parts of the season.
It's much the same way here. She obviously made it to the final two on The Bachelor, and she fell in love with a guy on Bachelor Pad. So what makes her so lovable? I want to know! Because right now, she just seems ... kinda boring for always being in the background.
Oh, well. At least they got to leave together.
Esther GimContributing Writer(Image courtesy of ABC)