Rock of Love Bus with Bret Michaels: Episode 5 Recap (Page 1/2)
Abbey Simmons
Abbey Simmons
Contributing Writer, BuddyTV
After four relatively dull episodes, Rock of Love Bus finally brought the crazy drama this week. Apparently we weren't the only folks bored with the ladies of Rock of Love as much of this weeks episode centered around Bret's displeasure with the women vying for his heart. Seeing that he's done this before, Bret's been comparing this season with his previous experiences on Rock of Love, and he is not happy. Bret just isn't feeling the girls this season like he was in Season 1 and 2. Despite being halfway through the season, Bret still doesn't feel like he's made any strong emotional or sexual connections, which makes for one moody rock star.

This weeks tour takes the ladies to St. Louis, MO. The first stop in St. Louie is at Larry Flynts Hustler Club, which if you're keeping track, is the second strip club Bret has taken the ladies to this season. Unsurprisingly, the Pink Bus which houses the wild women of Rock of Love Bus are thrilled about pulling up to the Hustler Club--because let's face it, some of these ladies are intimately acquainted with the pole. The more reserved women of the Blue Bus are none too pleased by the Hustler Club; especially Beverly who has been to both strip clubs this season. Turns out the women of the Blue Bus are right to be apprehensive, because Bret has a show changing surprise inside.

Inside the Hustler Club stands the ladies challenge...and shockingly, it did not involve a stripper pole. Instead, Bret challenged the ladies to a make-over challenge. No he's not turning the trash-tastic train wrecks of Rock of Love Bus into real ladies--that's what Charm School 3 is for, folks. Instead, Bret brought out three women who were obviously dressed to look especially unfortunate and tasked the ladies to turn them into hot rocker chicks. So out came the fake eye lashes teased hair, and midriff bearing tops and Bret was impressed...too impressed. Yes, the ladies of Rock of Love Bus did their job so well on these three unfortunate women that Bret fell in instant lust and did the unthinkable--he asked them to join the tour. So meet the latest Rock of Love Bus contestants America: Jamie, Jennifer and Kami.

While Bret is super-pleased that he gets three new make-out buddies, the original Rock of Love Bus ladies  are not pleased. The previously invincible Ashley is especially hurt by the new additions and she confronts Bret about it. In a sadistic turn of events, Ashley's pain and upset over the new girls makes Bret very happy and horny. After some serious tonsil hockey Ashley is feeling like her old self and gets on to talking smack about her remaining contestants...ah, back to the girl we love. Ashley tells Bret that she is convinced that Natasha is a man, and she lays out a whole list of reasons why. Bret is obviously drunk with lust, because he seems very swayed by Ashley's argument. While we would love that crazy twist, we are certain a penis would have been discovered somewhere in the vetting process for Rock of Love Bus. But Bret's not so sure,  he is so worried that Natasha may be a man that he almost point blank asks her about having a potential-package during some alone time later. Unfortunately for all of us, Bret was the one who lacked the balls to go through with the question.

--Abbey Simmons, BuddyTV Staff Writer

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