15 Things We'd Rather Do Than Watch the Royal Wedding
John Kubicek
John Kubicek
Senior Writer, BuddyTV
The most important day in the history of civilization is upon us, at least that's what I assume based on the media coverage. Prince William and Kate Middleton's wedding is scheduled for Friday, April 29 at 11am London time (that's 6am ET and 3am PT, if you're interested in).

I've already watched the romantic non-comedy Lifetime original movie William and Kate, so I've done my part. You'd think this wedding was a cross between the Olympics and the O.J. verdict given how much attention and coverage its received, but just like with soccer, it's something Americans only pretend to care about for a short period of time before we go back to ignoring the royal family and the antiquated system they represent.

Instead of going along with this farce, I worked with fellow BuddyTV writers Laurel Brown and Carla Patton to come up with a list of 15 things we'd rather do than watch the wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton.

-Listen to Donald Trump's "Presidential" platform

-Agree to the terms and conditions of Apple's iTunes without reading them

-Take a Glee Slushie to the face every day for a month

-Eat at Jake Pavelka/Danielle Staub/Heidi Montag's restaurant

-Have dinner at Andrew Zimmern's house

-Help an Extreme Couponer carry their groceries to their car

-Actually watch all of the reality shows mocked on The Soup

-Steal art supplies from Meat Loaf

-Get stranded on a deserted island with Survivor: Redemption Island's Phillip

-Betray a Mob Wife

-Watch Steven Tyler and Paula Abdul interview each other

-Take credit for NBC's 2010-2011 programming choices

-Go on a Fear Date with Brad Womack

-Listen to Simon van Kempen's "I Am Real" on repeat

-Do body shots off of Snooki

If, like us, you refuse to watch the royal wedding, let us know what things you'd rather be doing in the comments below.

(Image courtesy of Lifetime)