Now that Wilson stopped being friends with House on the season 5 premiere, House is left to figure out how to fix it, which means plenty of wacky schemes. In the appropriately titled “Not Cancer,” House comes up with three fairly insane ways to mend his lost friendship.
The first plan is to make friends with a new doctor at the hospital. He flirts rather heavily with a potential new BFF, but the guy is sufficiently creeped out when House invites him over to his place.
The second scheme to win back Wilson is where the show gets quite amusing. House hires a privative investigator to do some freelance work, though even the PI realizes he’s actually there to spy on Wilson and see if House’s former friend is pining over him. The PI (played by Michael Weston, in a recurring role that is rumored to possibly spin-off into his own series) is quirky and a little nuts, stalking women and hanging out in ice cream trucks. Luckily, it’s a fun kind of crazy and he’s very smart and observant.
The third plot involves the patient of the week, or patients. Several people received donor organs, and at the episode’s start, all but two are dead with one of the survivors dying after being admitted to the hospital. The last patient is a teacher played by Felicia Day, which is awesome because it gives me a chance to sing
Dr. Horrible songs in my head all night long because she played Penny in the brilliant web series.
House believes the people were all infected with cancer, though Foreman and the rest of the team assure him it’s not. Eventually, they learn this could be a cheap ploy for House to talk to Wilson, the resident oncologist. House eventually treats the patient for cancer, and it when she gets better, House, of course, thinks it’s not cancer now that everyone else does.
To solve his “cancer, but not cancer” dilemma, he visits Wilson, but the ex-BFF wants nothing to do with him and slams the door in his face. House and his new PI talk things out, which gives House his epiphany moment. The organ donor had cancer stem cells which attached to the recipients various organs and posed as them without actually doing their job. Hence, the patient has cancer stem cells in her brain, which makes it “brain, but not brain.”
To prove his diagnosis, House wants to cut into the patient’s brain and examine the fake brain cells, but since the chemo is working, Cuddy refuses and puts guards on her door to ensure House doesn’t purposefully make her worse to get what he wants. The solution is for House to hire his PI to do it for him, which works and the patient is cured. Though House is still sad over losing Wilson, he sees great potential in the PI being his new BFF, even if House has to pay him to do it.
What do you think of House's new PI?
-John Kubicek, BuddyTV Senior Writer
(Image courtesy of FOX)