'Bones' Teasers: 5 Things You Need While Watching 'The Brother in the Basement'
'Bones' Teasers: 5 Things You Need While Watching 'The Brother in the Basement'
Catherine Cabanela
Catherine Cabanela
Contributing Writer, BuddyTV
There isn't much to joke about in "The Brother in the Basement." In fact, making light of he second half of the season 11 Bones premiere would go over like cracking jokes at a funeral. Not cool. "The Brother in the Basement" is an intense ride that changes, well, everyone's lives. At the end of the episode there still remain several mysteries, both personal and professional, that have yet to be resolved. Is it a satisfying Bones-y episode? You bet it is.

Where Bones is concerned, the beauty is always in the details, whether it be damage to a stapes, or the particular trajectory of a bullet going first through a bottle of perfume and then through the victim, or the way Booth looks longingly sideways at Brennan while putting his lips to a bootle of bear. So instead of our usual cryptic teases which would have to involve details, I have some advice about what you are going to need to have with you when you watch "The Brother in the Basement."

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As a regular Bones viewer, you have learned that there are some things you should and shouldn't do while watching your favorite romantic crimedy. However, you never know if the episode coming up is going to be funny, romantic, tragic or devastating. That's what you have me for. Here are five things to have with you when you turn off your phone (unless that's where you watch Bones) and give the kids a new package of Oreos and tell them not to disturb you for the next 60 minutes unless their hair is on fire. 

#1 You Will Need Kleenex for Your Waterworks

It probably goes without saying that "The Brother in the Basement" is a tear-jerker, but, sister, this one will Lay. You. Out. The intensity hits you in the gut from the very first scene and doesn't stop. Prepare yourselves, people. I mean, go wild and buy yourself a new box of that extra fluffy tissue with pudding (or is it 'lotion'?) in it. If you are a human being, you are going to need it. 

#2 You Will Need a Barf Bag

This should be obvious, but it can't be said enough. "The Brother in the Basement" has no less than four scenes that could trigger the reject button on your gastrointestinal system. Put. The. Food. Down. Don't say I didn't warn you.

#3 You Will Need a Glass of Water

It sounds like this item contradicts #2, but it really doesn't. Get a water bottle with a resealable top. Fill it with water, not anything hot or sugary. Why? Because if you are as wrapped up in Bones as some of the rest of us, you will most likely sympathetically dehydrate when you see all the blood pouring out of Booth. Oh, the water bottle will also counteract the water loss from crying.

#4 You Will Need a Pad of Paper

If you don't have one, go buy one. You are going to need it if you have any hope of figuring out 1) How this whole thing got started, 2) Who is good and who is bad, 3) How this case is solved. Lots of complicated details. You may need one of Brennan's Venn diagrams as well. I've watched the episode three times and only just now figured it all out. If you are too complacent to do this yourself, come back to BuddyTV after the episode and I will explain it to you in my recap immediately following the east coast airing.

#5 You Will Need a Hand Exerciser

The tension in "The Brother in the Basement" is almost constant. There's some ass-kicking, some self-mutilation, some intense relationship drama, and, of course, lots of blood gore as the body count rises. 

Prepare your goody bag of necessities well in advance of when Bones comes on. It will be too late if that magical hour rolls around and you are unprepared, 'cuz you will be hyper with anticipation the hour before and you will not be able to take your eyes off the screen (except, perhaps, to take notes, but that's what the pause button is for) once the theme song begins. Keep Lovin' Bones and I'll see you here for "The Brother in the Basement."

Bones airs Thursday's at 8pm on FOX. 

(Images courtesy of FOX)