It's holiday time this week for our favorite polygamist clan, but there's not a lot of celebrating going on. So many untruths come to light in "Certain Poor Shepherds" that you have to wonder: Can even a big love conquer big lies?
You know things are bad when Bill questions God's plans aloud, asking whether he's sinning -- and therefore bringing punishment down on the family. But before you go calling anyone unholy, here are a few things to know about this week's episode.
Liar's Club
Nearly everyone gets caught in one kind of falsehood or another. In my subjective opinion, here they are in ascending order, white lies to whoppers:
Lois has dementia. After a series of disturbing incidents, Bill's doctor reveals that Lois has started a downhill slide mentally. Bill holds back on telling her, even though Barb urges him to. Lie rating (on a scale of 1-5): 1. Bill just wants Lois to enjoy Xmas.
Bill misleads Barb -- again. When Barb shows Bill (again) how strong she is and how underused her talents are, he promises (again) that he's going to make some changes, especially when it comes to church doings. But the changes end up benefiting oldest son Ben, not Barb. Lie rating: 2. Bill just can't give up his patriarchal beliefs.
Alby puts a headtrip on Laura and Adaleen. Alby works overtime to convince first wife Laura and mom Adaleen they're unholy and therefore unfit for life in the hereafter -- Laura for leaving him and Adaleen for hiding her pregnancy. Though Adaleen ultimately begs her son for forgiveness, Laura turns her back on him. Lie rating: 4. One point off the top rating for the fact that the evil and self-deluding Alby may actually believe what he's saying.
Cara Lynn finds out about JJ's death. When Cara Lynn quizzes Adaleen and Nicki about her father's whereabouts, they feign ignorance. The teen does some sleuthing and discovers JJ's burnt-out clinic. Confronted with the evidence, Nicki admits the truth. Lie rating: 5. Hiding the death of your daughter's dad, no matter how twisted he was, ranks pretty high on the "untruth" scale.
Margene's reveals her real age. Throughout the episode, Margene comes up with excuses to avoid giving her driver's license to Bill. (It turns out he wants to give her a gun for an Xmas gift.) She finally fesses up -- she didn't want Bill to learn she was only 16 when they married, not 18. Since Utah's age of consent is 18, the potential for scandal for politician Bill is endless. Lie rating: 11. This is big, people. Big. Huge. As Nicki says, "Congratulations, Margene --you've just ruined Christmas."
Fallout Shelters
How can the family bounce back from Margene's deception? Though the other wives are furious, Margie rightfully points out that she spent the last several years caught up in another lie -- the one that identified her as the "poor single mom" that Bill and the Henricksons were helping out. Until Bill revealed he's a practicing polygamist to the public, her true age didn't affect him or the others.
Barb's dismay that her husband hooked up with an underage girl (even unwittingly) sends her into a drunken tailspin. Nicki makes things worse (in her inimitable way) by reminding the older woman that she'd been against the Bill-Margene relationship in the first place. "Your anger is between Barb and Barb," she spits.
Oh, Bill -- why did you have to buy guns for Xmas gifts? Barb just wanted a new washer-dryer.
Score one for Bill, though, for helping Laura and her kids find a safe place at the Catholic women's shelter after Alby kills all the family's dogs. (His loony factor is climbing steadily, though not necessarily believably. The dogs? Really?)
Only Bill and Laura know that Alby is a closeted gay. So when Bill accuses Alby of turning his self-loathing and hypocrisy on others, only those three understand fully what Bill means. When Bill socks Alby in the jaw for threatening Laura, it's small payback -- but payback nonetheless.
Truth or Dare
Almost too much going on this week. Not every show would wrap up the "JJ's dead" storyline in the same week as Margene's reveal. I hope the writers will devote a little more time showing us how the characters react to such important news.
On the other hand, props for bringing back a luminous Tina Majorino as Heather, former best friend of Sarah Henrickson (the now-departed Amanda Seyfried). Could love be in the air between Heather and Ben?
But the real question: Will I be watching next week? I'd be lying if I said I won't be -- even on Super Bowl Sunday.
(Image courtesy of HBO)