'Big Brother 12' Recap: The Comedic Brilliance of Lane
'Big Brother 12' Recap: The Comedic Brilliance of Lane
John Kubicek
John Kubicek
Senior Writer, BuddyTV
I didn't hear a single word from this episode of Big Brother 12 because the sound of the Brigade patting itself on the back was so deafening. They made the final four, Hayden is the final HoH, they control votes and they dominated everything.

The only intrigue comes from the Brigade debating who would take who to the final two, but it's not really backstabbing. I do give the edge to Hayden, because even though he knows he's the best and would beat Lane or Enzo in the finale, we works hard on both of them to convince them to take him to the finale. I think it might work on Enzo, but I believe Lane is a lot smarter than that.

Lane could be my new favorite because he's playing a very different game from the rest of the Brigade. He's trying to avoid making decisions and playing too hard, even now. He knows he's definitely in the final three and he has a great shot of going to the finale. I have a feeling Enzo is every bit as dumb as he appears, but Lane is a lot smarter than he lets on.

Hide and Seek for $10,000

The HGs gets a luxury competition where they each need to hide a coin in the house and then find them. The last person whose coin is found wins $10,000.

Despite living in a giant house, three of the HGs hide their coins in the kitchen and Enzo hides his in the dining room next to the kitchen. Hayden's is found quickly by Enzo, but the other three spend about three or four hours tryin to find the remaining coins. Lane and Enzo have a decent strategy to look where they hid theirs, but Britney's strategy is the best, and it's not even hers. Hayden takes out the trash, where she hid hers, dumped it outside in the backyard and didn't find it, so no one even bothers to check it for the rest of the game.

Best Lane Quotes of the Night

On Britney dropping all her ornaments during the HoH competition:
"Britney, I don't know what went on in your childhood, or you're just pissed off at Christmas and hate Santa."

On Hayden's hair care products in his HoH basket:
"This guy's rocking girly, fou-fou shampoo in his basket. ... Get rid of the fou-fou hair shampoo, I don't know what it is, it's blue, I don't like it."

On his chances of winning:
"There's no word that could describe how excited I am cuz I'm in the final four. I have a one out of, what is it, three chances? Or four? I get them mixed up, like, do I count myself? Because I can beat myself. So do I count myself?"

On the luxury competition prize:
"A chance to win 10 grand? You know how many cases of beer I can buy with that? Plus muscle milk! Oh my gosh, this is Heaven."

On his hiding spot for his coin:
"Enzo, Hayden and Britney, they don't take out the trash. And they definitely don't know what recycling is. So boom, right there."

On Britney winning the luxury competition
"Damn it, she does not need 10 Gs. She's gonna use that for lipstick and leggings."

On romancing a woman:
"Real men will give you protection, attention all you want, but without the flowers. I'm not gonna send you no card, no flower. You're not gonna get any roses or anything mushy. We're going to the bar, we'll have a steak, we'll give you, like, some girly shot, you'll take a couple of those, and you won't be thinking of roses or tulips any longer."

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(Image courtesy of CBS)