I figured, now that we have more or less an idea of the personalities American Idol's looking at to temporarily replace Paula Abdul during the callbacks, I might as well start playing with what could happen.  Well, it's fun, and it reminds us of either the wonders of a Paula-less show, or the despair of just that, and you know I'm gravitating towards the latter, if only because of the way this all happened.

Here's what we know: Victoria Beckham (heretofore known as "Posh") has done two cities, Katy Perry (heretofore known as "Katy") is set for a still-unidentified callback, and Mary J. Blige (heretofore known as "Mary", but not to be confused with So You Think You Can Dance's Mary Murphy) will act as guest judge for the Atlanta callbacks today.  We have three names, and since my professor said three is the magic number, I can do something with it, yay!  Possibilities, possibilities.  What could happen?

First up, Posh, who's been called "icy and wooden" by some.  I know she's excited, but I have the feeling she's trying so hard to be nice.  While I have no doubt that she is (excited and nice), you can't hide an icy heart forever.  It's inevitable that she'll sound a lot like Simon Cowell.  Hello, British accent.  Or should I say "Bri-ish"?

I always thought she'd be a more, uhh, tough version of the former pop star turned reality judge, mostly because in Paula's heyday she wasn't exactly hounded by paps and splashed on the tabs, or at least that's what I know, since I was barely a kid during that time.  But I guess it's too late to suggest that she keep it real and not try to be nice, because it's already been done. 

Second up, Katy, who kissed a girl and liked it.  No, I don't expect something that scandalous on the show, unless someone from the auditions realized the ratings potential and set it up.  Well she's young, and still in the midst of it all, and she looks very fun to be with.  The catch is, when I heard she's going to be the guest judge, I knew that Simon wouldn't really poke fun at her or with her for some reason.

Personally, though, Katy will become more of eye candy for me, and I'll certainly stare at her for an extended period of time.  Not that I'm dismissing her insight.  It's just that, well...

Third up, Mary, who just can't be without you, baby.  Now, here's the thing.  Remember Lil Rounds?  When the judges pimped her almost endlessly, they compared her to--guess who?--Mary J. Blige.  I'm imagining the possibility that she'll be confronted with someone who takes a page out of her book and sings something close to her style.  That's possible, because it's Atlanta, and the musical heritage of the south's quite undeniable. 

Judging-wise, Mary's stint is the one I'm most excited about.  She's different from Paula in attitude, but she's that successful singer who can really give insight, perhaps hopefully in a more coherent manner than what came before.  It'd just be funny when someone similar comes along.  That, or they get Lil Rounds as a judge, but I don't think it's a good idea.

I can only dream, though, that Queen Latifah does become a guest judge, as was earlier floated.  She sings, but I know her more for her acting, and her congenial personality, and I think that's the best that could happen.  Sadly, her being a permanent judge is a far-off possibility, and we'll possibly contend with Belinda Carlisle or Cyndi Lauper being the new judge.  Or that other thing we've proved time and time again: nobody can replace Paula.

Ahh, this is going to be different.





- Henrik Batallones, BuddyTV Staff Columnist
(Images courtesy of WENN)