Are you stressed out about finding gifts for the holidays? Or maybe you’re just looking for a good book to curl up with by the fireplace. These books by Bravo-lebrities will either solve all or none of your problems. Either way, here is your Bravo-lebrity book list and gift guide. Get ready for lots of long titles with colons!

It’s Not Really About the Hair: The Honest Truth About Life, Love, and the Business of Beauty by Tabatha Coffey
This book has not been released yet, but is available for Pre-Order. It is described as, ” Part memoir, part business manual, and part coaching guide on achieving self-acceptance and love,” and encourages readers to find their inner “bitch” (“Brave, Intelligent, Tenacious, Creative, and Honest”). Uh … want it!

The perfect gift for: Anyone who works in the beauty business, fans of Tabatha’s Salon Takeover, or your favorite “bitch.”

Become Your Own Matchmaker: 8 Easy Steps for Attracting Your Perfect Mate by Patti Stanger
Finally, advice from Patti that we can read over and over again. I’m not sure if this book is more hilarious than it is helpful, but if you love Patti and her “penis does the picking” philosophies, this is right up your alley. Patti claims, “if you follow my formula, the man of your dreams will appear in your life, and you can be in a committed, monogamous relationship with him in less than a year.” Big talk with a deadline!

The perfect gift for: Your sassy, single friend, especially if s/he lives in LA or New York or if they hate themselves juuuuuust a little bit.

The Top Chef line of cookbooks (How to Cook Like a Top Chef, Top Chef Cookbook, and Top Chef Quickfire Cookbook) by The Creators of Top Chef
These books contain recipes from the show, so if you’ve ever wondered what a dish from the first three to five seasons, or even Top Chef Masters tastes like, now is your chance to try it out for yourself. As an added bonus, you can get a timer and try to complete the recipes in the same amount of time that the professional chefs did (and get a bonus heart attack). The books also include trivia, photos, and interviews with the contestants. The Quickfire Cookbook even includes instructions on how to host a Quickfire Cocktail Party! There’s also a Top Chef Quickfire Challenge GAME! Santa, are you reading this?

The perfect gift for: A Top Chef enthusiast. Not a perfect gift for someone who just likes cooking in general, as the Top Chef bonuses that make these books special and interesting will be lost on them. For the not-so-enthusiastic Top Chef fan, Tom and Padma have books, too.

Skinny Italian: Eat It and Enjoy It–Live La Bella Vita and Look Great Too! by Teresa Giudice and Heather Maclean
TITLE OVERLOAD! You know how in Italy they can eat whatever they want and stay thin? Teresa says you can do that in New Jersey, too. This is a cookbook with healthy recipes for Italian food and recipes for life (don’t have a chicken nugget eating contest with your buddies). Also, every copy helps toward getting Teresa her furniture back (not really, but does it?).

The perfect gift for: All those Teresa fans out there. Anyone? Anyone? OK, either that or anyone who loves making Italian food and can’t afford a vacation home in Rome.

The Real Housewives Get Personal
If watching them on TV isn’t enough and you want to take the Housewives with you wherever you go, here is your comprehensive answer. This book includes photos of your favorite moments, advice, quotes, and more about the Real Housewives of Orange County, New York, Atlanta, and New Jersey. As much as I love The Real Housewives, the most appealing thing about this book is the foreward by Andy Cohen.

The perfect gift for: Your friend who can never hang out because she’s watching/re-enacting The Real Housewives. Me? I’d rather have these Andy Cohen Watch What Happens Live shot glasses!

Little Kids, Big City: Tales from a Real House in New York City (With Lessons on Life and Love for Your Own Concrete Jungle) by Alex McCord and Simon van Kempen
This book is about raising your kids in an urban environment, but I hear parenting is exhausting and I’m tired from just reading the title. WHO HAS THE TIME?
The perfect gift for: urban couples with kids or expecting kids

Secrets of a Jewish Mother by Jill Zarin, Lisa Wexler, and Gloria Kamen
According to the description on Bravo’s website, “Secrest of a Jewish Mother shows readers that being clear about what you want is the best policy, and standing up for yourself and your family is always the right way to go.” So yeah, stand up for yourself and fair is not always equal and equal is not always fair (that’s another gem from the book). You want cliches, they got ’em!

The perfect gift for: Jill Zarin fans or someone who’s too lazy to read a real self-help/advice book.

If You Have to Cry, Go Outside: And Other Things Your Mother Never Told You by Kelly Cutrone
Okay I actually own this book and I am obsessed with it. If you love Kelly Cutrone (from Kell on Earth), you’ll love her even more after this book. She, like Tabatha Coffey, embraces the word “bitch” and offers life lessons for girls who want to make it in cutthroat businesses like fashion, or anyone who wants to be a “power girl.” Kelly offers lessons she learned in life, through telling her own incredibly interesting story.

The perfect gift for: A high school or college graduate moving to the city, the power girl/aspiring power girl in your life, or anyone who loves real, sharp advice.

The SkinnyGirl Dish: Easy Recipes for Your Naturally Thin Life by Bethenny Frankel
Bethenny Frankel was high atop her natural foods empire before The Real Housewives and she remains there today. As far as recipe/diet books goes, you can trust that this one is just a little more legit than some of the other ones the Housewives are putting out there.

The perfect gift for: Your friend who cried during Bethenny Getting Married and has racked up texting fees voting for Bethenny on Skating With the Stars. Bonus: Make it a fun gift bag and include Bethenny’s trademark SkinnyGirl Margarita!

Class with the Countess: How to Live with Elegance and Flair by LuAnn de Lesseps
This book is so cheap on Amazon, and got 47 1-star reviews, one of which reads, “If you want to know how fabulous ‘The Countess’ thinks she is and how marvelous she thinks her life is, then this book is for you … I was actually a little embarassed for her.” Can you afford not to buy it as a stocking stuffer (with a musical card that plays “Money Can’t Buy You Class”)?

The perfect gift for: A white elephant gift exchange.

The Naked Truth: The Real Story Behind the Real Housewife of New Jersey–In Her Own Words by Danielle Staub
Danielle is in some hot water for this book (or “piece of GARBAGE” depending on what Amazon reviews you read), but if you want to indulge in all the sordid details of Danielle’s life now you can. Blehhhh, yuck. This could be the next A Million Little Pieces, except that it’s not very well-written.

The perfect gift for: Blackmail.

(Note: Pretty much all the Housewives have books, like it’s part of their contract with Bravo, so I’ll have to leave some out. You know, in this economy.)

Style A to Zoe: The Art of Fashion, Beauty, & Everything Glamour by Rachel Zoe with Rose Apodaca
I love style books! Rachel Zoe is a stylist first, Bravo-lebrity second so you know this book is legit. The book focuses on developing fabulous personal style and other fashion issues like finding a “wow” piece and how to pack. I want it!

The perfect gift for: The fashionista, or aspiring fashionista, in your life. Even if they can’t stand The Rachel Zoe Project, it’s not an audio book so relax.

Tip It! The World According to Maggie by Maggie Griffin
Maggie Griffin, breakout star of Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List, has her own book out now (though I would also recommend Kathy Griffin’s memoir, Official Book Club Selection). Maggie loves her boxed wine and this book is all about living life to the fullest (and includes “how to survive on what’s in your purse,” apparently).

The perfect gift for: Anyone! Just include a box of wine with it and the holidays have arrived.

What Bravo-lebrity’s book would you buy? Any stars you wish would write a book?

(image courtesy of Bravo)

Carla Patton

Writer, BuddyTV

Originally from Seattle, Carla recently took a husband and moved to Austin, Texas, where she is finally using her television “problem” to her advantage. It’s sort of like Dexter, but boring and less murdering. Carla’s favorite shows include 30 RockThe Amazing RaceProject RunwayModern Family, anything with murder, and pretty much anything gross and weird (CSIThe BachelorToddlers & Tiaras, etc.). Favorite canceled shows include: Arrested DevelopmentVeronica Mars and Average Joe. In her spare time, Carla leads tours of downtown Austin on a Segway (don’t knock it ’til you’ve tried it!), blogs about Netflix Instant, and visits elementary schools telling children they don’t need math to succeed (just kidding, stay in school, kids).