The Real Housewives of Orange County┬áladies are busy “whooping it up” on a tropical vacation in Moorea. But there’s trouble in paradise for Meghan, who everyone seems to be having issues with, whether it’s about her parenting style or her relationship with her husband. Let’s see if she can put any of these ladies (specifically Vicki) in their places in this episode, “Swimming with Sharks,” so she can enjoy her vacation.

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Escape to Moorea

The Real Housewives are once again proving that they take better vacations than you. They take a ferry to the island of Moorea, where they stay in bungalows over the water. They have breathtaking views of the mountains and the crystal clear ocean; it’s really marvelous.

The first thing Tamra does is jump in the water topless. She hopes all the other women will join her, but Shannon’s too busy breathing into a nebulizer (for her cough) and Meghan says she hasn’t had enough cocktails to be naked.

After they get settled, they head out to a nice dinner, where Meghan gets annoyed at Tamra and Vicki for being so picky about the food. She says they should just enjoy their time in Moorea and not be so high maintenance.

Vicki talks about how all of the men are going back home at Brooks’ request. She says he’s trying to decide if he wants to do another round of chemo. She says she has other options, like “starving the cancer,” which the other ladies are skeptical of. Shannon thinks that it’s time that Brooks finally make an appointment with the doctor she recommended.

Later, Vicki gets Lizzie a pregnancy test. She wants Lizzie to know if she’s pregnant because if she’s not, she wants her to … you guessed it … whoop it up. Lizzie takes the test and finds out she’s not pregnant. She says she’s relieved and excited to start the party.

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Swimming with the Sharks

The next day, the ladies start drinking the Tahitian cocktails early before their snorkeling excursion. The ladies are talking about their kids, and the only way for Meghan to include herself in the conversation is by talking about her step-kids. Vicki is dismissive of Meghan’s feelings as a mom, but Meghan insists she feels the same for her step-kids as she and Tamra feel for their own. While Vicki is being rude (as usual), the moms have a point. And I’m sure that Meghan will understand that when she has her own kids, but until then the love that she has for her step-kids isn’t any less valid.

On the boat, Vicki starts screaming and carrying on when they see the sharks. The guide assures them that the stingrays and sharks won’t hurt them. Eventually, both Shannon and Vicki work up enough courage to go in the water, even though they’re both shrieking and hanging onto the guide.

The ladies are so hungry after their sea excursion that they stop at a roadside place for pizza. Shannon excuses herself to call David and finds out that not only did he let the twins go to a sleepover, but they were up until two in the morning (gasp!) toilet papering a neighborhood house (double gasp!). And what’s even worse, Stella broke her ankle trying to escape. The other ladies think it’s funny that Shannon is so worked-up about the twins’ adventure. Heather says kids will be kids and TPing isn’t really a big deal.

For dinner later that night, the ladies splinter into two groups. Heather, Lizzie and Meghan go out to dinner at the Moorea Beach Club. Meghan expresses her frustration with her earlier conversation with Vicki and Tamra. Heather tells her that her feelings have value; it’s just not an argument she’s going to win, especially after Tamra’s brutal custody battle. Honestly, the Tamra of last season probably would have really come for Meghan for saying what she said, but new and improved Tamra seems a little more low-key. Meghan seems to get it. She does say that she wishes Vicki would talk to her with a nicer tone, but that might be asking for too much.

Shannon, Tamra and Vicki decide to stay at the hotel bar, but they want to have as much fun as the other ladies. Of course, Vicki turns it into a competition, ordering fireball shots as soon as they sit down. Unlucky for them, the waiter doesn’t speak English and brings them vodka with lime shots instead. But lucky for them, the vodka shots are getting them properly wasted.

Vicki spends some more time trash-talking Meghan and her emotions as a step-mom. Mostly, they just act goofy and have fun. Shannon even admits to warming up to Tamra now.

Later, the two groups join together. Vicki and Tamra jump into the pool fully clothed and then they pull Shannon in with them when she tries to bring them more shots. So it’s basically Housewives Gone Wild.

And lucky us: we’re in for more of that in the next episode!

The Real Housewives of Orange County airs Mondays at 9pm on Bravo.

(Image courtesy of Bravo)

Gina Pusateri

Contributing Writer, BuddyTV