Kyle and Mauricio are training for a 69-mile bike ride to raise money for cancer (or against it). Kyle is training with Olympic Silver Medalist Mari Holden. No big deal, just an Olympic medalist! Mari informs Kyle that she needs to get an “extreme” bikini wax. Is there something more extreme than a Brazilian? Do I want to know? Kyle’s daughter is there to witness the waxing and it’s actually not weird at all. Kyle seems like a cool mom.
Meanwhile, Adrienne is training Taylor to kickbox for self-defense. It resonates for Taylor, who volunteers at a crisis center. Over on the ridiculous/delightful side of town, Lisa and Cedric are practicing for their American driving test. Lisa’s hoping Cedric’s license will prompt him to move out. Not a chance! And I hope he never moves out, it’s too much fun.
Kim and Kyle go out to lunch and Kyle is having trouble finding a housekeeper for when she and Mauricio go to Napa for the bike ride. Then Lisa calls to criticize Kim for never thanking Martin for a ride home, and this provokes discussion of Martin. Kim says she likes him but seriously, no one could tell. Kim feels like Martin should call her but she doesn’t really care enough.
Buckle up! More Camille (plus Hot Friend Nick weirdness) off the port bow! Camille’s adoring fans show up for her dinner party that Camille is hosting to talk more about the Kyle thing. WHY. Camille says she likes to “forgive and forget and move on,” and that no one has treated her as poorly as Kyle has. Really? Kyle’s just keepin’ it real! Camille decides to have the girls over for dinner, and Nick offers that men punch each other in the eye. Camille says Nick is hot. Barf.
Kim met someone (“Single Gary”) at the grocery store over a chicken war and she’s like, “I can do it all by myself!” Double barf. Stop talking about the chicken, Kim. Stop!
Kyle and Mauricio try to enjoy a romantic dinner in Napa but the kids call and Kyle is stressed out about Mauricio’s indecisive flight time. Then Kyle tells Mauricio she’d like to have another baby. So many babies!
Enter Single Gary. Woof! Kim is pretty sure he’s not a serial killer, so that’s a start. He brought his granddaughter. Then one of the baby daddies called and she was like, “oh he calls all the time, I hate him!” then leaves to nurse her youngest baby. THIS IS NOT GOING WELL.
Single Gary leaves to go get ice cream and says “you’re welcome to come if you want.” Kim says, “alright we’re all going! Actually, I’ll just walk you out,” to which Gary says, “good.” My hands are covering my face in second-hand embarrassment.
At the scary real life DMV, a man bothers Lisa until she and Cedric can finally take their written driving test. Lisa passes, Cedric fails. Yay! Cedric will continue to be a house guest!
Taylor is planning the crisis center celebrity poker tournament. Her co-chair asks Taylor to say a few words for the tournament. This leads to an admission that Taylor witnessed her mother being abused at an early age. I like Taylor more now that she seems like a real person.
The bike ride seems stressful at first, with everyone whizzing by, but then it looked really pretty. But then, somewhere after 30 miles, it looked really difficult. You go, Kyle! As it turned out, it was not all uphill.
Speaking of exercise, Camille and her fans friends go running on the beach. It helps her realize how important women are in her life. The important women in her life ask how long she’s going to be living in New York and Camille admits that “plans have been changed.” So this is the beginning of the end? Kelsey told her he might want to live in New York full time because he’s over LA and he feels “appreciated” in New York. Yeah, I’ll bet he does.
Camille wants to have a heart-to-heart with Kelsey when she sees him for the Tony Awards. Here we go!
On their way to the poker tournament, Russell tells Taylor that she could have had a larger tournament if she’d picked a different weekend. And he said it like a prick. For someone who owns a casino, Adrienne has played poker very little. But she’s wearing her tantalizing, sparkly weave! She looks like a Barbie I had. Can someone explain why everyone is wearing cowboy hats?
Taylor gives her speech and confesses to the room that she’s a child of domestic violence. She did a good job and it was for a great cause.
Next week: CRAZINESS!! Camille’s throwing a dinner party, but inviting her friends to swoop in and attack Kyle on Camille’s behalf. Ugly! Can’t wait.
(image courtesy of Bravo)