This week on Pretty Little Liars, all the girls go back into murder mystery mode except for Aria, who gets way too involved with her mom’s love life. Hanna stabs herself trying to escape from a haunted house, because ‘A’ is a ghost now, but Emily defeats the evil glass using a baseball bat. But this week Emily isn’t just breaking glass, she’s also breaking hearts. Especially when Paige sees her in a confused kiss with Maya’s cousin Nate.

And what’s Spencer up to? Oh just having a delightful mental breakdown the only way she knows how — by transforming into Catwoman. Spencer Hastings: honor student, knee sock aficionado, cat burglar. You’ve got a lock to pick or a cell phone to steal or an obscure question about medicine for the blind, Spencer is your girl!

What Happened at the Cabin?

Tonight the question on everyone’s minds was what exactly happened at Noel Kahn’s cabin? We found out last week that Maya was going to Noel’s crazy truth-or-dare parties, which opened up a whole avenue of things we didn’t know about Maya. Besides making out with Emily and leaving weed everywhere, what exactly was Maya up to?

The Maya question tinges the whole episode, working into just about everyone’s storyline. Even Aria, spending most of this episode on an entirely different show, had to face the facts that she didn’t know as much about her significant other as she thought. Emily is facing up to these same facts when it comes to Maya, causing her to make some strange choices. While Spencer and Hanna just want to solve the ‘A’ mystery for good so that they can go back to making out with their boyfriends without wondering when ‘A’ will murder them.

After Spencer uses her lock-picking powers developed from her side life of crime, Noel Kahn (maybe) sends her video footage of his cabin. See, Hanna and Emily had previously figured out from a picture Maya uploaded to her site that she had spent some time there. Considering Maya was always talking in weird riddles about time moving backwards and Noel Kahn always talks like a Batman villain, I would have loved to overhear their conversations.

The footage shows Noel and Jenna going into the cabin to get their groove thing on at 1:14 AM and then Maya exiting the cabin. As Maya exits, a shadowy hand grabs her and pulls her out of frame. As usual, when it comes to scary visual elements Pretty Little Liars really knows what it’s doing.

So here are the suspects we can take off the Maya killer list (although not the ‘A’ list):
– Garrett
– Jenna
– Noel Kahn

Suspects we need to keep an eye on:
– The Ghost of Noel Kahn’s cabin

All we know about the ghost is that it loves playing beer pong, closing windows and watching teenage girls stab themselves.

Speaking of the Ghost of Kahn Cabin…

It’s been some time since Pretty Little Liars decided to go all out horror movie on us. The last time the show decided to get all Silence of the Mona was when we spent the hour hanging out in Radley Sanitarium Creepy Doll Room of Coded Messages. So it was actually nice to take a moment to get back to the creepy chills and thrills this show does so well.

Hanna and Emily take an unscheduled and unannounced trip up to the Kahn cabin, where they find Maya’s bag with a pocket knife that says LJ and a card Emily once made for Alison. Is there something special about this card?

We still don’t know because as the girls discuss, the cabin gets haunted real quick. All the doors and windows slam shut and the power goes out. The Ghost of Keggers Past really doesn’t like it when you come to the cabin without a beer offering!

When the girls try to break out Hanna accidentally stabs herself in the leg because it’s Hanna and of course she does. Who tries to break a window with a pocket knife in the first place? When is that ever a good idea?

Wren Goes for Another Liar

When they get home Hanna is like “No hospital Emily! We are bandits on the run! My mom routinely shivs old ladies and puts their money in the pasta boxes, I can’t have the fuzz in here!” So instead Emily calls Wren, who jumps at the chance to stitch up someone underage.

After stitching her up, Wren goes in for another kiss but Hanna’s like, “I’m not Spencer or Aria, I like my dudes age-appropriate.” Poor Wren is heartbroken. Another day, another rejection from a teenage girl. He’ll just have to wait around to see if Aria ever breaks up with Ezra, because he would definitely have a shot with her.

Broken Hearts

Poor Emily just wants to get back to normal and enjoy her new relationship with Paige, whose Harley shirt lets us know she joined a biker gang since we last saw her. The gang just peddles around on bicycles to the local pools and dunks people’s heads underwater.

But Emily has to deal with Maya’s cousin Nate and all of his mood swings. Nate is coming unhinged, snapping at Jenna in a crazy way that makes him seem like the angry husband in a Lifetime movie right before the montage where Jenna learns karate.

Later, he tells Emily he’s having a hard time still with Maya’s death and they hug. Then they do a little bit more, when he goes in for the kiss and she reciprocates. Outside, poor Paige sees the kiss and looks all kinds of confused. Someone’s getting drowned tonight!

Moms and Maggie

Meanwhile Aria puts on her most ridiculous neck-piece in order to get all up in her mom’s romantic business to avoid her own. Her necklace looks like it’s from the ye olde days and is meant to shield her chest from the arrows of her enemies. On this show though, that might not be such a bad idea.

Ella is playing the field and Aria is harshing on her because she doesn’t want to deal with the Maggie situation with Ezra. “Playas gotta play Aria,” Ella says to her daughter wisely. “Playas gotta play.”

Aria takes this advice to heart and tells Ezra she’s sorry about the way she reacted, but Ezra reveals another bombshell. He found Maggie living in Delaware. What will this mean for Ezria?

The rest of the girls are sustaining stab wounds, picking locks, going through surveillance footage, and battling ghosts. Aria? She’s going to yoga with her mom and talking about boys.

‘A’ Tag

‘A’ is hanging up all the black hoodies and watching coverage about Garrett’s case, until ‘A’ flips to Wheel of Fortune. ‘A’ is Vanna White!

Next week: We’re ramping up to a betrayal and there are snakes in a dressing room! Spencer has had it with these mother%&*%ing snakes in these mother%^%*ing dressing rooms!

What did you think of tonight’s episode? What happened to Maya at Noel Kahn’s cabin? Who killed Maya? Who’s on the ‘A’ list? Share your theories in the comments!

Morgan Glennon
Contributing Writer

(Image courtesy of ABC Family)

Morgan Glennon

Contributing Writer, BuddyTV