I bet this is going to be exciting. Something major is afoot on Grey’s Anatomy. As can easily be deduced on the title alone, it’s the first day of the merger – and as proof of that, Seattle Grace is no longer just Seattle Grace, it’s Seattle Grace Mercy West hospital (they changed the signs and all). And as Mer starts off her dialogue, we see the Mercy West people arriving one by one to the hospital, just like, you know it, an invasion.

Already, there is some ruckus in the locker room, because some tiny Mercy West person insists on putting her stuff on George’s locker, which, of course, Izzie would prefer to leave empty. Luckily, Karev comes in to stop her from attacking the tiny one. Cut to a shot of the lobby with a bunch of people in orange scrubs. Way to really make them stand out.

The displaced SG people camp out in Mer’s room to talk about the invaders. “They’re here, it’s over,” says Cristina. Mer is being positive, though, and proceeds to quote a Sigourney Weaver movie for her pep talk. “We own this hospital,” she sums up. Is she the leader? Everyone leaves except Cristina, who says she no longer knows what she’s fighting for.

Torres is back, and Mercy West’s very own Alex Karev tells Owen that in Mercy West they do zones – his name is Jackson Avery, by the way. Karev tells the Chief that Izzie needs this, for fear that he might fire her. I have a bad feeling about this.

Meanwhile, a Mercy West person approaches Izzie to sort of apologize for the locker-usurping incident – his name is Charles Percy, by the way, and he can really talk. He asks Izzie for the key code to the research library, she says it took her two years to get it. I smell ulterior motive here.

Bailey reports to Callie that her daddy is there. He’s concerned because she hasn’t been calling. They hug, and Calliope espies a priest they know, and right away, she was like, you’re here to pray away the gay? Oh lord. “You can’t pray away the gay!” she screams across the hall – man, Callie had been screaming at people lately. She reports the matter to Arizona, who tells her to talk to him. She probably thinks it was “awesome” – and tells Callie to cut her daddy some slack because, unlike her coming out story, Callie’s was a little weird. HAHA Arizona says it’s awesome.

Lexie is in zone 5 with Sarah Drew, who, out of all things to say, makes a reference to the “psycho intern cabal” who went around chopping people’s organs. Their patient is in handcuffs because he broke into someone’s house and was beaten black and blue.

Next patient is a woman who is on a lookout for a good kidney, which they recently got her. Izzie, Bailey, and some other people walk in to tell the woman’s sister on the phone, altogether, that “it’s a good kidney.” By the way, her name is Ms. Fremont. Bailey asks a question and everybody except raised their hands, except Charles, who answers it right away. He was like, ew you guys raise hands.

Two pals are wheeled in, they have a problem apparently because guy 1 slept with the 19-year-old daughter of guy 2. “I love her,” he says, and the other guy wants to kill him. Yang is handling him, alongside Avery. Yang totally pawned him by quickly stabilizing the patient, and telling him, “that’s how we do it here” or something, then walking out.

Charles is making the moves on Izzie, she proceeds to tell her that he has had the biggest crush on fellow doctor Reed (that’s the tiny Doctor Iz had a tiff with earlier), but too bad she doesn’t notice him. Unfortunately, Iz is a sucker for things like that, so she gives him the key code.

Meanwhile, the Chief is given a template speech when firing people by an HR person. What? The Chief doesn’t want to do it, but Bitchy Girl from HR tells him that one pregnant intern he fired via email sued for wrongful termination. Snap.

Back to burglar patient, with his luck, he gets assigned to Derek, who, as we all know, is not exactly the most compassionate toward convicts and felons and probably shoplifters.

The 19-year-old daughter comes in to see the guy, and when the other guy sees the two of them, he grabs a hammer and threatens to do something very horrible with it. Fortunately, Avery tackles him just in time. The rest of the staff and bystanders applaud his efforts, which irks Cristina, because it doesn’t have anything to do with medicine.

Guy 1 and Owen talk football, still in relation to the tackle, and the guy he saved wants Cristina to get Avery so that he can thank him. “I saved your life!” Cristina reprimands him.

Meanwhile, the squabble between Karev and Reed is getting intense, because he starts stealing lab results. In the process, these two are completely ignoring the daughter of the patient, which I bet will tell them off later.

Lexie’s burglar patient tells her to do something before Sarah Drew makes more of an idiot of her. “Find your open window, a weak spot, undefended,” he tells her. Way to go, burglar humor.

Der visits Mer, closes the blinds, and she’s very curious about the Mercy West people. “Are you and Cristina in a dark and twisty place?” and she laughs again. “We are,” she confirms. Laugh.

Dr. Anderson – that’s Sarah Drew – scored one over Karev. Oh this is brewing to be something intense.

Callie is not  happy with the visiting father. “You should’ve adjusted by now,” Callie tells Daddy, and she brings up the you’re-supposed-to-love-me-father card. To retaliate, he raises the gays-will-rot-in-hell card, and proceeds to quote the scriptures. Too bad for him, Callie has an arsenal of bible quotes herself, and her delivery is so much more dramatic, with the big eyes and the walk out to cap it off.

Now we’re back to Lexie and Mr. Criminal, who’s got a present for him – Sarah Drew‘s notebook. He proceeds to read cheesy passages from it, including “Only you can keep you down” and “You’re the future of medicine.” Right, but how did he do that handcuffed and all?

Lexie, Cristina, and Karev discuss their respective Mercy West adversaries. Iz meanwhile comes in and reports that she’s giving Charles – her Mercy West guy – coffee. She tells them that they can actually be nice if they don’t feel threatened. These people are paranoid. They realize none of the MW people are having lunch, so they disperse.

Cristina reaches a breaking point when Hunt chooses Ivory to scrub in. Don’t we all love a Cristina moment.

Meanwhile, Charles turns out to be a two-faced bitch who is only using Izzie to get the key code. But just like how it happens in the movies, just as he was reporting this to his fellow Mercy West cretins, Izzie walks in, hears everything, and intentionally drops the coffee she’s bringing in.

Callie is obviously distraught, and Arizona is trying to be a good girlfriend. Awesome.The bickering between Karev and Reed finally gets to the daughter of a patient, and I think she snapping may have knocked some sense into the two. But I wouldn’t count on it.

Charles tries to apologize to Izzie and say that it’s nothing personal, because that’s what they do. A very, very angry Izzie tells him that that’s not the way things work in Seattle Grace, citing the example of a certain dead guy who jumped in front of a bus to save a stranger – OK, so to date there’s still no Grey’s Anatomy episode without a reference to George.

Meanwhile, Yang is distraught, she’s actually crying. She goes to Mer and tells her that what, she misses Burke? But it’s not the sex or the relationship, she misses holding hearts in her hand because it was “right” – I really hope Owen gets to see this. Cristina’s crying voice is garbled and scary. She finally says she doesn’t want to join in all the fighting anymore. She goes to Mer’s bed and lies on her shoulder. Aw. This is the only lesbian storyline I would buy, if ever.

Sarah Drew is mortified that Lexie has read her notebook. Meanwhile, Alex and Reed are still at it. “I’ll stop if you stop,” she tells him. But of course that’s not how things are.

Uh oh. Arizona is talking to Mr. Torres, who doesn’t want to talk to her. She tells him that she was named after the ship, not the state, plus a bunch of stuff about her family and how she came out to them. She tells him that, after telling him that she’s lesbian, her dad only had one question: are you still the daughter I raised. Awesome speech, but probably not enough for Jesus-Jesus Mr. Torres. Let’s see.

Bailey goes on reprimand Iz about a huge oversight that may potentially be fatal to a patient. She is crying. And I think I know why – she’ll get fired. Lexie is once again alone with Mr. Criminal, and she goes on to show him that there are splats of tears on Reed’s notebook. “You stole her comfort from her,” she tells him.

Bailey has the arduous task of telling the patient that she’s no longer getting the kidney (because of Izzie), while Lexie returns Sarah Drew‘s little red notebook, and tells her that it must be hard to be the invaders, but she sort of apologizes because it’s over the line.

Izzie is called to the chief’s office – uh oh – and already, she’s hysterical at the prospect of being fired. The chief tells her that Derek and Owen had concerns about her stamina, but – the HR person interrupts him – so he just proceeds to say the Firing Script verbatim. Oh my god. “Please don’t do this to me,” she whispers, adding that she doesn’t have anything left – and we get the voiceover.

Callie, meanwhile, sees her dad waiting outside but completely ignores him and is like, “See you in hell.” HAHA. But he has something to say, and says that all her life, he’d been there to catch her. They talk wedding and kids, so I guess this is what they call a breakthrough. “Does she make you happy?” he finally asks her. Finally! That’s the question you’re supposed to ask gay sons and daughters! “Is she a vegetarian, cause I don’t know how much more I can take,” he kids. See how funny people get when they’re not uptight?

Finally, Alex sees a note, probably about Iz, and goes to Mer’s room, where Cristina still is. “Izzie left me,” he tells the two of them, simply. He looks like he’s on the verge of crying. “Go hug him,” Mer admonishes Cristina, but he slightly retreats. It’s the moment of truth. Will Yang hug him? And that, people, is the cliffhanger this week on Grey’s Anatomy.

– Glenn Diaz, BuddyTV Staff Columnist
(Image courtesy of ABC)

Glenn Diaz

Staff Writer, BuddyTV