After Part One of the Desperate Housewives season 4 finale, which ended with Wayne kidnapping Adam, part two begins with the subtitle “The Next Morning.”
Katherine (Dana Delany) heads to the police department to try and report Adam’s kidnapping, but since Wayne is a cop with cop friends, the plan is flawed and Katherine decides to pack up and run away. She tells Dylan (Lyndsy Fonseca) the truth, but all we get to see is Dylan’s reaction, which involves her running out and pushing her mom away.
The women of Wisteria Lane meet for their weekly poker game. Bree (Marcia Cross) wants to invite Katherine to their game, but the other women don’t agree. Katherine interrupts to say she’s leaving in a hurry and won’t be able to help cater Bob and Lee’s commitment ceremony. Bree immediately enlists all her friends to help with the big gay wedding.
Julie (Andrea Bowen) gets accepted to Princeton and is supposed to leave in one week for a special summer program. Susan (Teri Hatcher) doesn’t want her to go because she’s so needy. She eventually comes to her senses and realizes that Julie going to college is inevitable. It’s kind of sad that Susan has a new husband and son, yet still thinks she’ll fall to pieces without her daughter.
At the Scavo Pizzeria, Bree meets with Bob and Lee who debate whether the ice sculpture should be a cherub or an enchanted castle. Orson (Kyle MacLachlan) arrives to offer his calligraphy skills to help with place cards. Tom (Doug Savant) tells Lee to fight for his enchanted castle otherwise he’ll be the loser in every argument in the marriage. Bree picks up the ice cherub, but on the way back to the big gay wedding, her phone dies and she gets a flat tire. She gets Ben’s baby stroller (remember that kid?) and rolls the sculpture back. One wing falls off as Orson drives up offering a ride.
At the ceremony, Orson continues to convince Bree he’s worthy of forgiveness, but she maintains that the only way to fix it is for him to turn himself in to the police for hitting Mike with his car. Lee sees the cherub and immediately gets upset, leading to a massive fight between him and Bob where they cancel the party. Tom and Lynette (Felicity Huffman) realize they have to fix it so they sit Bob and Lee down to give marital advice. Tom explains that if they’re willing to break up over an ice sculpture, they shouldn’t be together, because then they won’t be able to deal with the big things like tornados and cancer. Lynette is moved by Tom’s awesome speech about how no disaster could possibly tear his marriage apart.
Carlos (Ricardo Antonio Chavira) is angry with Gabi (Eva Longoria) over her exorbitant credit card bills, then goes off to sulk by reading porn…in Braille. Does such a thing exist? Ellie calls up, asking Gabi to bring her a teddy bear from Ellie’s dead dad. Gabi opens it up and finds quite a lot of money that she immediately decides is now hers. Ellie calls Gabi back wanting to know about the bear, and as Gabi denies any knowledge, Ellie threatens to return and throw acid in Gabi’s face if even one dime is missing.
Carlos puts on his jacket and he hears Ellie breathing in the room. He warns Gabi about her presence, and rather than call the cops, Gabi goes to protect the money. This leads to a huge Ellie-Gabi catfight over the money. Gabi finally gets free to call the police in when Carlos’ seeing-eye dog grabs Ellie, but she still manages to escape into the big gay wedding.
Wayne makes his way back to Katherine’s house where he throws her against a wall and pulls a gun on her. He wants to know what happened to his daughter, and she says he might as well just shoot her. He wants to know the whereabouts of Dylan, or whoever that girl posing as Dylan, is. Amping up the crazy, Ellie barges into the house for hiding, but Wayne shoots and kills her. Wayne is pleased by the alibi, as he can stage it so it looks like Ellie stabbed Katherine, and Katherine shot Ellie.
Bree knocks on Katherine’s door in the knick of time, but is briskly pulled inside by Wayne. Hilariously, right outside, Mrs. McCluskey is talking to the cops about Ellie the maniac. Wayne threatens to kill Bree unless Katherine tells him the truth about Dylan. This leads to a flashback when Mary Alice Yong(!) babysat young Dylan and told Katherine that Wayne visited. Wayne returns wanting his daughter back and Katherine hits him with a candlestick. Later that night, Katherie finds Dylan dead. She and her Aunt Lily buried her in the backyard, and to protect the secret, Katherine adopted a new baby who she pretended was Dylan.
Meanwhile, a bloodied Adam breaks free from Wayne’s makeshift prison and hijacks a car to get back to his family. He crashes through the big gay wedding and storms into the Mayfair house. Adam knocks Wayne down, and while Adam and Bree go to call the cops, Wayne talks about how he’ll make it his life’s mission to make Katherine pay, so she shoots and kills him. Bree gets all the women of Wisteria Lane to concoct a self defense story, and it works.
FIVE YEARS LATER.
That’s right, Desperate Housewives is doing the time warp, five years into the future. Gabi has two chubby rugrats, Bree is a successful businesswoman and back with Orson (and dapper Andrew is her social secretary or something), the Scavo children are juvenile delinquents (no surprise there), Dylan is engaged and Susan is married. To someone who is not Mike.
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-John Kubicek, BuddyTV Senior Writer
(Image courtesy of ABC)