When I first heard that Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino would be guest starring in an upcoming episode of Bones, I wanted to jump through my computer screen and slap series creator Hart Hanson. Hard. But then I kept reading.
Turns out, there’s some silver lining.
Ausiello Files reports that Sorrentino may be playing a murder victim on the show. Hanson states, “A guido is killed and Booth and Brennan enter that world to find out what happens. We’re not sure if it’ll happen or not. Talks are ongoing.”
The wheels in my head are already spinning. How will Hanson kill off the orange-skinned, ab fab beacon of Guidohood? Clearly UV rays and alcohol poisoning aren’t savage and expedient enough, but in light of the role Sorrentino would be slated to play, I wouldn’t be surprised if the murder scene takes place in some smelly, sweaty gym locker room.
Sorrentino–assuming his busy schedule isn’t already packed with bar brawls and booty calls–would be playing Ritchie “The V” Genero: a fitness guru who loves crunches as much as he loves his Gotti-Mommy. Hanson is currently searching for the perfect Guidette to play the part. Whoever she is, I hope she’s prepared to witness plenty of ab-stroking between takes.
David Boreanaz (who plays FBI agent Seeley Booth) and Emily Deschanel (forensic anthropologist Temperance “Bones” Brennan) spend much of their time poking around human remains and using big words, but Deschanel hints that they’ll drop plenty of Jersey Shore references: “Brennan anthropologically studies them and knows the lingo and the behavior. [She’s] down with the whole guido stuff,” adding “I guarantee that there will be a fist pump.”
Sound off, Bones fans:
(Image courtesy of MTV)