Oh goodie, another Thursday, which means five minutes worth of “previously on Big Brother 8” footage, Julie Chen’s awkwardness, and the chance to see someone go home solely for pissing off Dick. This week sees Kail in the hot seat for the third week in a row for no obvious reason – she’s not a strong player, she’s not well-liked, she has no real alliance ever since hat overblown Mrs. Robinson thing fizzled. And Eric? Well, he got screwed by some a-hole who can afford to waste money flying banners over the backyard set of a TV game show.
Tonight’s episode is very important because the loser is gone, but for everyone else, they’re guaranteed to either be in the final two or be a part of the sequestered jury that picks the winner. If Eric stays, America may have a chance to vote. If Eric is out, the America’s Player twist is officially the most ill-conceived invention yet for this show. It’s a lot like Communism – great in theory, but impossible in practice. Enough babbling, on with the show!
Kail continues her clueless nature, claiming everyone likes Eric. Dick’s brilliant strategy is to slowly psychologically destroy Eric’s four alliance mates. Apparently Amber told Eric she lied to her boyfriend about being pregnant, and while Eric didn’t tell Dick, he said he had the dirt on her. Amber swore on her daughter’s life she’d keep Eric. Dick and Daniele tell them to take that out of the equation. Dick twists everything around and invokes God to convince Amber it’s OK to break a promise on her daughter’s life.
Amber is convinced, but Dustin tries to talk some damn sense into her. He fails, and it looks like they agree to vote out Eric. Amber confronts Eric and cries. What she said to him was said in confidence (except for everyone with the Live Feeds who watched it at home). Amber is now as irrational as anyone, yelling at Eric who just sits there and takes it. It’s crazy awesome.
Julie asks the HGs about Amber’s meltdown. Jameka says it’s all good, and then she regrets taking herself out of the next five HoH competitions.
Jen’s OK with giving up half the money, Still, in a bunny suit, I kind of wish Julie Chen was wearing one. It would make it all better.
Dustin gets the first viewer question: why does he always wear the same gray t-shirt. The HGs laugh it off.
How famous is Dick? The keyboardist for Guns ‘N’ Roses knows him, as does the guitarist for Alice Cooper. It turns out, he is quite popular in the club scene. Girls wear shirts saying “I [Heart] Dick.” It makes me momentarily not hate him.
Julie asks Daniele if she’s 100 percent sure Eric was the vote to evict Kail. She says she can’t be 100 percent sure, despite the many comments to the contrary last episode.
Coming up next: Kail’s husband. I predict he’s the male version of Carmela Soprano.
Kail owns two restaurants, a grocery store, and a motel. While her husband is interviewed, some Leave it to Beaver music plays.
Nominee speech time! Kail gives a normal speech. Eric is nearly crying during his time. Looks like he’s going.
Dick – “Happily”: Evict Eric
Jen – Reluctantly: Evict Eric
Jessica – Bubbly: Evict Kail
Zach – Nonchalantly: Evict Eric
Jameka: Smiling: Evict Kail
Dustin: Straight-faced: Evict Kail
Amber: Holding her cross necklace: Evict Kail
Wow. Goodbye, multiple business owner. You see the wind taken out of Dick and Daniele’s sails. On the bright side, Amber’s daughter’s life is no longer in jeopardy.
In the house, it’s awesome, because Dustin claims he voted to evict Eric, as per his deal with Dick. Amazingly, suspicions may now be thrown off Eric, since they know it wasn’t him this time.
In video farewells, Dick is certain she won’t be seeing this. Dustin calls her a bitch. Jen would also be surprised if Kail was seeing this. Daniele apologizes for breaking her promise from the HoH competition last week.
HoH competition! “Let’s Make a Duel.” Two HGs face-off at a time, answer a question, and the right one moves on, the wrong answer is eliminated. Dustin and Eric: Eric moves on. Dick and Zach: Zach is wrong and eliminated. Eric and Jessica: Julie slips and gives the answer. HA! Jessica is right. Jen and Dick: Dick is wrong and eliminated. Jessica and Amber: Amber is wrong and gone. Jen and Jessica, the final two: Jessica wins!
Jessica is the HoH! Jameka, Dustin, and Eric jump for joy! Dick is already thinking about how best to pack his things.
America’s Player: um, what happened with that last one about flattering someone? Oh well, now it’s time to pick who he should try to get nominated. Gee, I wonder if it will be Jen again.
Julie Chen manages to finish up the rest of her script without messing up once. Too bad none of those moments will be on YouTube by the end of the night.
-John Kubicek, BuddyTV Senior Writer
(Image courtesy of BigBrotherCaps)