American Idol Season 9 Premiere: Live Thoughts (Page 1/2)
American Idol Season 9 Premiere: Live Thoughts (Page 1/2)
Abbey Simmons
Abbey Simmons
Contributing Writer, BuddyTV
After months of waiting and several major changes to the show and judges panel, it's time for season 9 of American Idol to get started in earnest tonight. We begin the search for America's next Idol tonight in Boston with the help of guest judge, Posh Spice...errr, Victoria Beckham.

The question on everyone's lips: will Boston help season 9 off to a wicked awesome or wicked awful start? Watch along with me tonight as we get our first glimpse at the Idol hopefuls, judges' panel without Paula, and Simon's last round of American Idol auditions. Be sure to follow along with me here and in 140 character quips on Twitter.

This is my first night covering Idol and there aren't any easy Paula Abdul jokes to make, so please be kind and patient. Luckily, auditions usually take care of the jokes in it's own right. And if you want to know a little something on who'll be sharing your Idol journey all season, please read my personal intro.

It's Idol time and we are still rehashing what a shocker last season's Idol finale was. How much do you think Kris Allen hates that photo/video of his mouth agape? After embarassing Kris Allen, we get a little intro to the behind the scene drama with Paula leaving, Ellen joining, and our celebrity guest judges. Joining us tonight, as you know, will be Victoria Beckham. After a five minute intro, with some already tear-jerking moments (the cop! the father who wants to provide for his special need child! the Southern girl who feels trapped!) we get to rainy Boston-Town. And here we go, let's find the next American Idol.

9,000 dripping wet folks showed up to audition for Idol in Boston and hopefully at least one of them says wicked and is wearing a Red Sox cap or all my Boston stereotypes will be shattered. 

First up is Janet who says she's only been 'singing well for two years' thanks to practice via the American Idol video-game. This bodes poorly. Not only for jumpy, muffin-top bearing Janet, but for all of us.

janetseason9.jpgThankfully Janet does say wicked awesome and my life is complete. While the American Idol game apparently tells Janet that she is great and destined for stardom, the game is lying. Janet is in fact possibly the most tone deaf person who ever thought she could sing. So, those of you singing along to American Idol the video game and getting through to Hollywood, let me tell you this: THAT VIDEO GAME IS A BIG FAT LIAR. (Please do not audition for Idol, without inquiring humans who love you if you are tone deaf.)

Next up is our first sob story, 16 year old Maddy Curtis who is the 9th of 12 kids, including several siblings with special needs. Please say this kid can sing and they're not just making me cry for no reason. Maddy seems like a sweetheart and she chooses "Hallelujah" by Leonard Cohen to audition, a song that should come with a "Grab Tissues NOW" warning in it's own right. Thankfully, Maddy can sing and she has a bit of soul with a raw edge to it. Given the opportunity and rigors of American Idol she could improve greatly. All the judges love Maddy's soulful style and thought her nerves were adorable. Simon is especially impressed that she's not annoying. She gets four yeses and is heading to Hollywood. She further wins the judges (and America) over by thanking them and saying what a pleasure it was singing for them as she exits.

Then there's emo guy in the holding room and some bad dancing courtesy of Pat Ford, who will regret his two minutes on Idol for the rest of his life. Either that or he will remix it and put it on loop on YouTube, because Pat seems slightly deluded about his own fabulousness. Pat offers a choreographed, toneless rendition of Womanizer by Britney Spears. Proof:

Pat thinks he did awesome and tells Simon that "he's even sassier in person than he was on TV." He then dubs him "Sassy Simon." (Thank you Pat, I will be using that all season.) Randy offers the back-handed compliment of "I bet you have a lot of friends." (And hopefully you don't sing for them.) Actually, I wasn't far off... as Randy tells Pat, "I love you, let's hang out, but stop singing forever." Youch.

Then a montage of ladies from Boston who we'll be hearing from again including Jennifer Hirsch's jazzy goodness, Claire Fuller, a gorgeous gal who does a break down on Mr. Big's "Be With You" (which I owned on cassette single in 5th grade, until I played it so much it broke), and Jess Wolfe. You'll be seeing all three of these ladies and hopefully a full rendition of Mr. Big in Hollywood.

To continue with tonight's stereotypes ... Amadeo Diricco and his huge effusive Italian family who gather around Mama's table every week, drinking home made wine and busting each other's chops. Hopefully Amadeo can actually sing and his chops would have been busted by said family if he could not. He'll be auditioning with Muddy Waters "Hoochie Coochie Man" which gets initial giggles from the judges ("ahaha he said coochie") until Amadeo busts out in a soulful rendition which would not sound out of place in the best Southern Gospel choirs. He is bluesy, soulful, and full of personality and passion. Simon gives the ultimate compliment telling Amadeo he just gave his favorite audition of the day and he even likes his energy. After such ringing endorsements, Amadeo gets a round of yeses from the judges, tackled and strangled by his six cousins and brothers...mussing  up Ryan's flawless hair. Congrats Amadeo (and your big old Italian family, who we'd like to have dinner with) you're the first man to make it through to Hollywood.

Your next Idol and his crazed cousins?