Relationships are tricky business, particularly if you’re either a rich and famous Hollywood star or a fictional character. In Shipping News each week, I break down for you the three most note-worthy (to me!) relationships — i.e., ships — o’ the week into the Tip-Top Ship Shape (for the best ship of the week), That Ship Has Sailed (for romances that fell apart) and You Sunk My Relation Ship (for the most devastating moment in a romance we’re shipping for). Got a duo you’re totally shipping for? Drop me a line in the comments, and you may see them featured here.
Tip-Top Ship Shape: Kelsey Grammer and Kayte Walsh
Seeing Kelsey Grammer on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills was one of the oddest moments in my Bravo-viewing history. My brain couldn’t quite comprehend 1) what the hell Frasier was doing on a Bravo reality show and 2) what the hell Frasier was doing married to one of the craziest, most shallow, egocentric, insecure women I’ve ever seen on TV (aka his third wife Camille Grammer). But now officially (sort of) ends the reign of terror: Kelsey Grammer got engaged this week to his lady friend, Kayte Walsh. If Camille wasn’t so bad at pretending to being a human being, we might actually try harder to pretend to feel an ounce of sympathy for her. But I say, congrats, Kelsey and Kate!
That Ship Has Sailed: Kim Kardashian and Gabriel Aubry
“I’m barely in the picture! Wait, that’s totes a metaphor.”
After weeks of dating, reality star Kim Kardashian and model/Halle Berry ex and baby daddy Gabriel Aubry called it quits this week. Apparently, according to a source, they were “moving too fast” and are “better off as friends.” But, luckily (?) for fellows everywhere, moving fast is just Kim’s speed, as she’s already filled Gabriel Aubry’s spot with New Jersey Nets player Kris Humphries. Poor hot model Gabriel Aubrey. How is he ever going to find someone else?
You Sunk My Relation Ship: Booth and Brennan, Bones
Last season, Booth confessed his love to Brennan, who felt she had to refuse it.
But … while investigating the murder of a brilliant but lonely surgeon this week, Brennan realizes that rejecting Booth might be the great regret of her life. She confesses this to him, barely holding back emotion. Alas, Booth has moved on. With obvious discomfort, Booth explains that he’s with a woman he loves and who is not a consolation prize.
Instead of being her logical, rational self, this leads to Brennan breaking down in tears (if the robot is crying, you know it’s bad), even while acknowledging that she’d missed her chance and had to accept it. Noooooooooooooooooooooo! Geez Louise, Bones writers! What are you doing to us?
(Image courtesy of WENN and FOX)