Here’s where we’re at on Lost: Jack, Hurley, Miles, Sun, Lapidus, Ilana, Ben and Richard are on Team Jacob.  Sayid and Claire are on Team Flocke.  Sawyer and Kate are on their own team.  Jin is a POW and Charles Widmore is back on the Island with another mercenary team.

Easter Eggs from “Ab Aeterno”>>

Quiz: How Well Do You Know Richard Alpert?>>

This week’s episode is all about Richard, and it’s all about the 19th century.  If you actually enjoy the flash sideways, you’re out of luck.

Team Jacob sits around the campfire listening to Ilana’s story.  We go back to the time Jacob visited her in the hospital and learn she was tasked with protecting the six remaining Candidates and bringing them to the Temple.  After that, Richard will know what to do.

But Richard doesn’t.  He simply tells everyone that they’re all dead, literally, and that the Island is Hell.  Someone’s been reading too many crackpot online theories.  He then decides to change sides, so he takes his flame and heads off to join Team Flocke.  Meanwhile, Hurley starts speaking Spanish with some invisible dead person who’s not Jacob.

This takes us to a flashback.  Not a flash sideways, a flashback.  Waaaaaaay back.

1867, The Canary Islands

The majority of this episode proceeds like a Merchant Ivory film.  Richard is married to Isabella, who is dying.  He must save her, so he heads to the local doctor (a half day’s horse ride away) for some medicine.  Unfortunately, he doesn’t have enough money, so the doctor turns him down.  If only President Obama’s new health care reform bill could time travel, Richard would be able to afford his wife’s medicine.  I guess this really is a big effing deal.

He struggles with the doctor and accidentally kills him during the fight.  Richard scampers off to save his wife with the stolen medicine, but Isabella is already dead.  His life gets even worse when he’s thrown in jail and sentenced to death.  He begs to be forgiven by a priest, but gets none because he doesn’t have enough time to do penance.  I suspect that will change very soon.

Instead of being hanged, Richard is sold to Jonas Whitfield, working on behalf of Magnus Hanso, a name very familiar to hardcore Lost fans.  He’s put on board the Black Rock as a slave and eventually the ship crashes in the middle of the Island after passing the giant four-toed statue of Anubis.  The ship hits the statue, which explains why it’s not standing any more.  Hold on, is that an answer?  Wow, Lost is actually living up to the promise of answering questions.

When the slaves wake up, they find Jonas coming down to kill them all, because there are a limited number of resources.  After killing everyone but Richard, the glorious sounds of the Black Smoke Monster are heard.  Smokey does his thing and kills everyone, ultimately staring down Richard and letting him live.

The big problem is that he let him live still chained up.  Richard spends a painfully long time trying to get free, meeting a pig and Isabella during his adventure.  Isabella claims they’re both dead and in Hell.  She’s about to get him free when Smokey returns, so he makes her run to protect her, but above board, we hear Smokey killing the fake dead Isabella.

NEXT>>

(Image courtesy of ABC)

John Kubicek

Senior Writer, BuddyTV

John watches nearly every show on TV, but he specializes in sci-fi/fantasy like The Vampire DiariesSupernatural and True Blood. However, he can also be found writing about everything from Survivor and Glee to One Tree Hill and Smallville.