Last week on Gossip Girl, Georgina Sparks came to town and stirred up all kinds of trouble. She started small by convincing Serena to get wasted, but eventually kicked things up a notch by drugging her and making her miss the SATs. After S caught on to G’s duplicitous antics and told her to get out of town, Georgina decided to make a play for Serena’s man. Meanwhile, Blair (Leighton Meester) did her best to ensure that Nelly Yuki will have a tough time getting in to Yale.
Tonight, one of the show’s male characters is caught kissing another man. Gossip Girl’s inbox is definitely going to be full after this secret comes out.
The episode begins with Gossip Girl talking about scandals. It seems someone is spreading rumors about Queen B and Little J, but who could it be? Jenny (Taylor Momsen) is busy lying to her dad about a party that she’s planning, but he saw the website for her shindig and knows exactly what she’s up to. He decides to think about things before confronting her about it.
Eric makes a crack about how there was once a rumor he was Gossip Girl, which is hilarious since that idea was all the rage on the Internet for a while. He also wants to know why Jenny hasn’t been returning any of his calls. J, who thinks he’s jealous of Asher, is totally flattered and thinks E has a crush on her. Unfortunately, she’s already madly in love with her new man.
Across town, Georgina, under her fake name, has become buddy buddy with Dan (Penn Badgley) and Vanessa. She mentions that she would just love to meet Serena, who she’s totally never met before in her life, of course. Dan later runs the idea by S, but she’s too busy studying to take her SATs. They plan a big dinner for the next night instead. As Dan walks out of the school, he sees Asher making out with. . .somebody. Somebody who is most definitely male.
It’s been a while since we’ve had a good scene between Rufus and Lily. He goes to her for some advice about Jenny. He knows she’s been lying, but Lily (Kelly Rutherford) tells him that she’ll come back to him eventually. At least Jenny’s antics, unlike Serena’s old scandals, are all rated PG. The friendly meeting turns awkward when Rufus sees Lily try on her wedding dress.
Dan decides to confront Asher with the news that he saw him making out with a guy, but A gets all defensive and homophobic. Little J interrupts and immediately takes her boyfriend’s side. Dan asks Blair and Serena for some advice, and B tells her that Jenny’s only going to believe the scandal if she hears it straight from Gossip Girl. Before you can say “Blackberry,” everyone in the school knows that Asher was caught making out with a guy. Unfortunately there’s no photographic evidence, but Blair is determined to get some.
Blair’s girls manage to steal Asher’s cell phone from his locker, which allows B the chance to forward all of his incoming e-mails to her inbox. Meanwhile, J is feeling awkward about her boyfriend’s possible homosexuality. She confronts him about it, and he tells her that he’s only dating her so she’ll look good in front of her friends. As a trade, he gets the bonus of appearing heterosexual. You know, Asher, before choosing someone as your beard, you should probably ask them if they’re up for it.
In case there aren’t enough scandals in this episode, S gets a video full of debauchery from Georgina. In the video, we hear G telling a guy to set a camera up, and then it sounds like a wild threesome breaks out. Awesome! A few moments later, G stops by for an awkward dinner.
Gossip Girl has more news: Little J apparently lost her virginity to Asher. Dan is furious, but Jenny explains that it’s a lie concocted to cover up the gay rumors. She’s pissed and tosses him out of her room when she finds out that he’s the one who tipped off GG. Later, J tries to leave for her party, but Rufus (Matthew Settle) tells her that he knows she’s been lying to him. He tries to keep her from going, but she takes off anyway.
At dinner, G throws Eric right out of the closet and tells Serena and Lily that she saw him making out with a guy. He admits to it by refusing to deny it, and Lily is shocked by the news. Serena tells Eric that she’ll be there for him no matter what, and E admits that he met Asher at the Ostroff Clinic. He also plans to crash his big shindig, which should make for the most awkward and awesome party ever.
Speaking of awkwardness, it’s time for Serena (Blake Lively) to meet up with Dan and “Sarah.” S quickly sends Dan for a cup of coffee, then asks G what the hell she’s up to. Apparently Serena didn’t even know the sex tape existed. Georgina threatens to show it to Dan if S doesn’t remain on her best behavior.
Not only is Eric crashing Asher’s party, but B is too. She gives Asher his cell phone back and tells him that she knows his little secret. That’s when Eric steps up, admits that he’s gay, and tells everyone at the party that he was the one making out with Asher. B quickly sends the e-mail proof over to Gossip Girl, and soon Jenny’s friends have turned on her. She lied to them about losing the big V, and lying just isn’t acceptable in the clique.
Lily apologizes to Eric for her reaction to the gay bomb dropping. She admits that she’s scared for him and wants to protect him, and they share a touching moment together. Aww. Two people who won’t be having a touching moment are Jenny and Blair. J admits that B has won the social war. She no longer wants to lie to her family and friends. Ending up like Blair just isn’t worth it.
Dan and Serena are having another argument, and it’s all due to S’s refusal to tell the truth. She tries to convince him that “Sarah” is untrustworthy, but he thinks she’s nuts since she just met her. After Dan takes off, Georgina admits that she just wants to be friends with Serena again. That’s what she claims, but it isn’t long before she’s talking of blackmail and destruction yet again. Those two girls are going to end up catfighting in a fountain at some point.
As the episode comes to a close, Jenny returns home in tears. She’s broken her dad’s trust and lied countless times, but he forgives her anyway. Across town, S tells Blair her big secret: SHE KILLED SOMEONE!
OMFG. Best. Episode. Ever.
– Don Williams, BuddyTV Staff Writer
(Image courtesy of the CW)