If you were excited to find out who Tila Tequila chooses on the season 2 finale of A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila, you’ll need to wait another week. While the Kristy-Bo face-off will conclude, MTV is wasting this week with a pre-finale reunion/clip show. In the pantheon of MTV’s awful ideas (That’s Amore and Jesse Camp would be my top 2), this is a close third. On the bright side, it gives me an excuse to dust off the classic photo of Chad and Bo’s showdown and will give MTV a flimsy reason to show that awesome footage as many times as possible.
All the contestants except drunk Venezuelan Christian and kreepy Kyle are here with host Ryan Stout, doing the job I could easily do (making fun of the stupid people on this show). We get our first clip montage including crazy George who never slept, crazy “Glitter” Samantha and Jay’s obsession with his home state. I still kind of like Jay, but he’s an awful ambassador for the great state of New Jersey. Ryan Stout asks about Jay’s free loving moms, and he’s OK with it. Jay still hates Bo and says he’s only in the final two because Tila Tequila has sympathy for him since Chad broke his jaw.
Lauryn (yeah, I don’t remember her either) gets upset at Jay for no reason and begins yelling at him. She then picks up her chair and throws it near Jay. He throws it back. I’d say “WTF,” but to be honest, watching this show greatly messes with my ability to be shocked by insane behavior. Ryan Stout hilariously acknowledges then insults the 12 people eliminated on the first night for being insignificant. Serenity and Lili, the two lesbians who got kicked out for making out with each other, make out again at the behest of everyone.
A Brittany montage quickly puts me to sleep. She then admits that Tila probably chose Kristy over her because, among other reasons, Kristy’s boobs and ass are bigger. Samantha, the stripper called “Glitter,” gets her own crying montage, followed by the challenge dominator Lisa.
Finally, it’s the moment we’ve all been waiting for: the arrival of Chad! He’s easily my favorite person ever on A Shot at Love and I won’t apologize for it. Mr. Wang Bone gets an extensive montage of his best moments, which are plentiful and hilarious. He admits to being all himself on the show and has no regrets about the head butt and punch he gave Bo. Chad goes a little over the line calling Bo’s mother a whore.
We get another fight montage, which gives MTV a second chance to show Chad breaking Bo’s jaw. Before bringing Bo out, the security guard put Chad into a cage. It took me a while, but I finally realized Bo looks and sounds a lot like a slightly more sophisticated Johnny Knoxville. Lisa calls Bo out on his infatuation with Tila Tequila the celebrity as his only reason for being on the show. The contestants encourage Bo to go after Chad, which leads to a long showdown where Bo wants to kill Chad and Chad takes off his shirt to taunt Bo. It goes on forever as the security guards keep Bo at bay while he repeatedly threatens Chad’s life.
Chad gets escorted out and Ryan Stout sits down with Bo and Kristy. They are boring, then things turn to Sirbinra who addresses the huge news issue of her kissing another chick at a Seattle Mariners game. That’s now where I live, so it appears no matter where my home is, A Shot at Love is making headlines there. Sirbrina explains how ridiculous the story was, then Brittany shows us what would really get you kicked out of a baseball game by making out with Sirbrina.
Two final montages of the final two round out this incredibly drawn out and pointless special. Ryan Stout asks who won and they refuse. Maybe he should’ve had season 1 winner Bobby Banhart on. To prove that Kristy’s butt is real, she asks Ryan Stout to grab it hard and vouch that it’s real.
Next week on the season finale of A Shot at Love 2 with Tila Tequila: Tila chooses either Kristy or Bo to date for a couple of weeks before breaking up so season 3 can begin. During the hiatus, one of these contestants may get their own spin-off dating series.
-John Kubicek, BuddyTV Senior Writer
(Image courtesy of MTV)