MTV’s bisexual dating show is back, only this time, there’s no Tila Tequila. After striking out twice in the love department, she’s stepped aside to make way for Vikki and Rikki, the bisexual Ikki Twins! That’s right…twins! Twelve heterosexual men and 12 lesbians will compete to win the hearts of the bisexual Hooters girl twins. It’s A Double Shot at Love.
The daters are flown in via helicopter, being dragged in two giant boxes below the choppers. At least, that’s what we’re supposed to think, but that has to be illegal and it looks very fake. The twins want to trick the contestants, so Rikki will meet everyone while Vikki watches from her bedroom.
First up are the girls, and there are way too many to count. The standouts are Claudia the dominatrix, and the tattooed Bostonian Bella.. Rikki makes out with Jen, the Kentucky lifeguard, but they’re rudely interrupted by Kandi, a make-up artist. Jen and Kandi get into a huge fight, which is actually incredibly sad because a little over a month ago, Kandi was killed in a car accident. Then the girls have an animal costume fashion show.
Xoe = Spider
Angela = Cow, which is mean because she’s a big girl
Dana = Chicken
Elise = Bunny
Claudia = Ladybug
Rosemarie = Donkey, and she vows to give any girls causing trouble a donkey punch
Jen = Fish
Kali = Bee
Nicky = Bull
Rebekah = Duck, and she wants to f***. That’s something my best friend would say, so Rebekah is my favorite.
Kandi = Pig
Bella = Cat
A Double Shot at Love Girls Elimination Time! Dull Jersey girl Dana, dominatrix Claudia, tattooed Bella, and big girl Angela are eliminated. However, Angela gets the last laugh, because as she leaves, she says she’s straight. HA!
Finally, it’s time for the guys to get out of the box. They immediately yell and shout like a group of idiots, causing the guys to either go insane or become fully erect. If this were the Douchebag Olympics, it would be a 12-way tie for the Gold medal. Jersey boy Scott is a loser who gets into a fight with player Josh for no real reason.
Coop has a freaky foot fetish and Nick is an odd combination of goofball and metrosexual. Trevor looks like Owen Wilson’s surfer boy younger brother and James is a right-wing conservative who loves George W. Bush. WTF? The fact that he would come on a bisexual dating show on MTV intrigues me and makes me hope he stays around. For their fashion show, the guys dress like super heroes. It goes a lot quicker, so I couldn’t catch oall of their names.
Scott = Wonder Thunder
Trevor = Wave Man
Nick = The Lone Ranger
James = Right Wing, in a poor choice of costume because he’s a little pudgy
Coop = Power Tool, an appropriate nickname because he’s a huge tool
Ben = Not So Super Guy
Freddy = Captain Heat
Matt = Captain 6-Pack
Fazio = Faz, because he’s faz-tastic
Josh = Dr. Desire
A Double Shot at Love Guys Elimination Time! In an indication that the Ikki Twins aren’t really bisexuals, they only eliminate three guys: fast Freddy, globe-trotting Fazio, and tatto artist David. I guess the Ikki Twins really hate tattoos.
The next day, the remaining 17 contestants head to the pool to engage in some petty trash talk like when Scott sees all the lesbians and thinks a softball game is about to break out. It’s awfully homophobic, and he’s still a total dillweed, but that’s king of funny. Rikki tells everyone she was born with another part, and the guys all think it means she’s a transexual. Jen is less concerned, because it’s happened to her before. Vikki comes out, and everyone freaks out over the twins.
This season on A Double Shot at Love: Fights, disgusting eating challenges, sex, love, ambulances, and everything else you’ve come to expect from MTV reality dating shows about bisexuals. Also, one guy says, “This house is full of surprises…and douchebags” and one girl calls another a “skankbot.”
-John Kubicek, BuddyTV Senior Writer
(Image courtesy of MTV)