On the season 20 premiere of ABC’s The Bachelor, Ben Higgins took viewers on a tour of his small Indiana hometown, and the throngs of adoring residents made it even harder to believe that this one-time, high-school quarterback could consider himself “unlovable.” Ben met 28 women, some leaving a more indelible impression on the dimpled Lothario than others. Ben got blindsided not once, but twice. First, by the appearance of twin sisters Emily and Haley and again, by the return of former Bachelor contestants Amber and Becca. Ben narrowed the playing field from 28 to 21. Let the games begin.
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1. The Girl with the Basket of Bread
Breanne, the nutritional therapist from Seattle, brought Ben a basket of bread. After announcing that gluten was Satan, she decided they should break the loaves, literally. She then smashed perfectly good food against the wall and insisted Ben do the same. Nothing screams high-maintenance like a woman with a grudge against baked goods.
2. The Girl with the Rose on Her Head
Mandi, the busty dentist from Portland, Oregon, decided her best course of action was to greet Ben with a gigantic rose on her head. Mandi told Ben if things went well, maybe he could pollinate it later. How would that work? The sad thing is that this was the most normal thing Mandi did all night.
3. The Girl Who Speaks Russian
Shushanna took Ben’s hands and proceeded to speak entirely in Russian. The guy couldn’t even understand her name, calling her “Shanna.” She made an impression, I just don’t know if it was the right one. After their introduction Ben questioned if he was just tired or losing his mind.
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4. The Girl Who Jumps Into Ben’s Arms
Caila, the 23-year-old sales rep, took a big chance when she exited the limo and took off running towards Ben. It looked like she was trying to re-enact the lift scene from Dirty Dancing. Good thing Ben played football and knows how to catch. The whole scene was only made cheesier when Caila thanked Ben for catching her and then asked if she could “catch up” with him inside. Groan.
5. The Girl with the Horse
Maegen is a cowgirl from Texas, and she brought along her mini horse, Huey, to prove it. It’s a step up from a Pomeranian in a purse, but still not an ideal party guest, especially when he tried to eat another woman’s dress.
6. The Girl with the Twin Sister
Okay. Who wants to compete with their sister for the same man? It was like a Doublemint commercial gone bad. Haley and Kelly are every man’s biggest fantasy- twins. I cannot be the only one who cringed when Ben asked for a group hug. The three-way thing is just pornographic.
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7. The Girl Who Admits to Being a Stalker
Lauren R. admitted to stalking Ben via social media for two months. She then proceeded to recite all the facts she learned, but all Ben was interested in hearing was her name. He asked, but Lauren R. was so busy babbling, she didn’t answer. Lauren promised to show him something special later. As she walked away, Ben once again asked for her name, but an oblivious Lauren disappeared into the house, leaving Ben to wonder who he had just spoken to.
8. The Girl Who Hikes a Football
Leah exited the limo with a football and asked Ben if he was ready to play ball. She bent over, presenting her hindquarters to Ben like a baboon ready to mate. Here’s a tip, if you plan to hike a football between your legs, opt for a cocktail-length dress. Watching her try to chuck a ball awkwardly through tool was most definitely not cute.
9. The Girl with the Mask
Joelle “JoJo” emerged from her limo with a giant pink unicorn mask over her face. The woman could barely find her way to the man of her dreams. I’m not sure what the whole point of the masquerade was, but Ben took it in stride.
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10. The Girl with the Bouquet
Lauren H. left no doubt that she came to play when she tossed a half-dead bouquet of flowers at Ben. She told him she caught it at a wedding a week earlier. I’m curious how many other women she trampled to get it.
11. The Girl Who Wears Her Pajamas
It takes some self-confidence to show up to a formal party wearing an extremely unflattering adult-sized onesie. But that’s exactly what Isabel “Izzy” did. She admitted to being under-dressed, but how else could she know if Ben was the “onesie” for her? Insert eye roll here.
12. The Girl on the Hoverboard
Rachel, unemployed, should have had enough free time to come up with a better gimmick than arriving on a glorified skateboard. She told Ben she was on “Cloud 9” and asked him if he’d like to join her. Cheesier than Velveeta, but then again, boys do love toys.
Who do you think had the strangest first impression? Think you know who will go home next? Play The Bachelor Fantasy TV by making your picks here.
The Bachelor season 20 airs Mondays at 8pm on ABC.
(Images Courtesy of ABC)