We’re two teams lighter for this leg of The Amazing Race in Indonesia. It’s OK that Ethan and Jenna are gone, they were loaded down by their existing millions anyway. Did you know that the Dutch colonized Indonesia? I did not. Anyway, the teams will have to go on a Colonial, 1940’s bike riding reenactment, courtesy of the Dutch.

Sometimes I feel like The Amazing Race is all about the costumes. Colonial Andy and Tommy have a good time doing all these extraneous bike tricks. Ah, they’re so cool and sexy. They’re followed by Laurence and Zac, and showgirls Kaylani and Lisa. Ernie and Cindy depart fourth, and they are over-prepared because Cindy is an organizational freak.

Twins Liz and Marie leave next, followed by Jeremy and Sandy (what do we know about them? Anything yet). Bill and Cathi take off next, carrying their attitude of “we might as well live it up because we’re going to die soon,” with them. The volatile Justin and Jennifer leave and might know the least about how to ride a bike successfully. Amani and Marcus leave last, declaring that it’s not over ’til it’s over. Truer words never spoken.

Andy and Tommy park their bikes and head via taxi to a restaurant in Salakmalang Village for their next clue.

In an unexpected disaster, Ernie loses his bike pedal. They try to fix it as the twins, Jeremy and Sandy, and the grandparents pass them. Despite their debilitating attitude and inabilities to ride a bike without running into a wall, Justin and Jennifer pass, too. Cindy is FREAKING OUT.

The teams pile into taxis to arrive at their first Detour. Rice Field or Grass Fed. For “Rice Field,” the teams will deliver a meal to the men and women in the fields, and plant 300 rice seedlings. For “Grass Fed,” teams must fill bags with grass, fetch two sheep, and pick up six buckets of water from a well.

Do Andy and Tommy know they’re in a race? They’re just having such a good time. Amani and Marcus are not having a good time, as they’re in last place and their cab driver is lost. Laurence and Zac arrive second and also choose Grass Fed, behind the rollicking snowboarders. Laurence and Zac make a critical error, carrying three buckets instead of two. Andy and Tommy vowed at the beginning of this leg to read their clues very carefully because of what happened before, so they know this is a violation.

I don’t know what is going on with these grass fields, but apparently they’re impossible to run in? Everyone fell down! Cathi fell many times over. Planting rice looks really painstaking and frustrating. Not as frustrating as having a taxi driver who doesn’t know where he’s going, though. Poor Amani and Marcus.

Andy and Tommy arrive at the temple, then get saronged before the temple. They’re so polite, asking if it’s OK to run or not! At the top of the temple, they receive a Road Block. Teams have to count Buddha statues, and demonstrate the four different hand positions. Andy and Laurence work together, their teams having formed an alliance of badassness.

Cathi is just a disaster today, losing her sheep, falling down, and yelling, “hey children!” after the local kids who are running away from her errant sheep. Marcus’s sheep is also failing to cooperate, so he just picks it up. They elect to switch over to “Rice Field,” but the editing made the mistake sound effect. What did they do wrong or leave behind? I didn’t catch it.

The Road Block is challenging, because you have to count, and remember the hand positions. I foresee a lot of frustrated teams with this one. Kaylani and Lisa show up, along with Liz and Marie. Jeremy and Sandy’s taxi breaks down, so they run the rest of the way.

Ernie, Justin, and Kaylani are going about this Road Block all wrong, counting every single Buddha they see, rather than just the larger statues. Their numbers range from 69 to 263. These are all wrong, and we haven’t even gotten to the hand positions. Amani and Marcus could still be in this!

Laurence is a total baller, he and Andy figured that out on their second try. In a gesture of good will, Andy and Tommy share their answers with Amani and Marcus. They want to keep them in it. The problem is that once they got to the top of the temple, they’d forgotten everything. But they should know that the hand positions matter, as the rest of the teams are just figuring it out.

Laurence and Zac finish first, but they have to take a 15 minute penalty because of the extra bucket. Andy and Tommy tried to warn them! The snowboarders come in first, but know they owe their win to Laurence and Zac, who are checked in second.

Ernie, one of the twins, Jeremy, and Justin realize all together that they need the count of each distinct hand position. Marcus can’t really remember what Andy and Tommy told them, because he was exhausted.

“SHOOT!” Marcus shouts at the Buddhist Temple. Enlightenment was not reached that day.

Bill has figured out that the hand positions matter, but he’s being very loud about his (wrong) answers. Everyone is pretty much tied up at this Road Block. For whatever reason, Marcus shares his stolen information with Lisa. Bill is the only one not in on an alliance so far, but he figured it out on his own before the gang.

Jeremy and Sandy, who didn’t have to settle up with a cab, finish third. Justin and Jennifer finish fourth, with Ernie and Cindy in fifth. The twins and the showgirls have trouble finding their taxis as Amani and Marcus finish sixth (they did it!). Bill and Cathi come in seventh, so it’s down to the twins and the showgirls searching for their cabs.

Liz and Marie find Phil first, finishing in eighth. The largely unsuccessful Kaylani and Lisa finish last and are eliminated. Phil gives them some free therapy, and really draws out their exit interview. The elephant was making funny noises in the background, so I couldn’t really concentrate on Phil’s newfound empathy.

(images courtesy of CBS)

Carla Patton

Writer, BuddyTV

Originally from Seattle, Carla recently took a husband and moved to Austin, Texas, where she is finally using her television “problem” to her advantage. It’s sort of like Dexter, but boring and less murdering. Carla’s favorite shows include 30 RockThe Amazing RaceProject RunwayModern Family, anything with murder, and pretty much anything gross and weird (CSIThe BachelorToddlers & Tiaras, etc.). Favorite canceled shows include: Arrested DevelopmentVeronica Mars and Average Joe. In her spare time, Carla leads tours of downtown Austin on a Segway (don’t knock it ’til you’ve tried it!), blogs about Netflix Instant, and visits elementary schools telling children they don’t need math to succeed (just kidding, stay in school, kids).