Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee. Paris Hilton. Kim Kardashian. Rihanna. What do all of these people have in common? They’ve all been linked to celebrity sex tapes that people actually want to see. But, unfortunately, as we’ve learned from the recent leaking of Hulk Hogan’s sexcapade, for every Rihanna and Kim there are an equal number of Chynas and Dustin Diamonds that no one ever asked to see (but countless of us begged to unsee).
While watching the actor formerly, and in fact only, known as Screech from TV’s Saved by the Bell utterly fail to make the two (yes, two!) girls in this sex tape do anything approximating real screeching, the only saving grace is that you don’t see too much of Diamond in the frame.
#5 Tonya Harding
It turns out that kneecapping fellow skater Nancy Kerrigan is only the second most disgusting thing figure skater Tonya Harding could put in her autobiography. Don’t let the wedding dress in this one fool you; she was just dressed up for Halloween … as a drunk bride with a shaky camera.
If you couldn’t get quite enough of wrestlers in sex tapes from Hulk Hogan’s recent foray into the genre, how about getting two for one! Chyna made a sex tape with fellow wrestler XPac. Given wrestling’s reputation, do you think that the surprise total eyesore ending was legit action, or do you think it was just staged?
#3 Fred Durst
Limp Bizkit frontman Fred Durst made a sex tape. I just typed Fred Durst and sex tape in the same sentence. Pardon me while I go soak my brain in Clorox.
#2 Verne Troyer
When Verne Troyer and his then live-in girlfriend’s sex tape leaked to the public, the diminutive actor best known for playing Mini Me in the Austin Powers franchise was dismayed when he didn’t make “one million dollars.” We were just plain dismayed.
#1 Tom Sizemore
Hey, what’s super high and drunk and can’t get excited about three professional escorts? That would be Tom Sizemore in his embarrassing sex tape. Or, should I say, attempted sex tape?