Game of Thrones delivered its biggest twist ever in the sixth episode of season 6, “Blood of My Blood.” No one died. Sure a few skeletons were struck down, but they were technically dead already. This might be the first episode in the show’s history without a human death.
However, that doesn’t mean nothing happened. King Tommen made an unholy alliance that will put Jaime Lannister directly in the path of the impending Jon Snow vs. Ramsey Bolton war. Arya Stark finally made a decision that will hopefully get her back in the action. A character we haven’t seen since season 1 miraculously returned. And there were dragons, Gilly being a total feminist and, thankfully, no extreme close-ups of warty penises.
King Tommen’s Unholy Alliance
Margaery Tyrell is about to make her own walk of shame, but she meets with King Tommen and tells him that she’s seen the error of her ways and the High Sparrow isn’t such a bad guy. If I know her half as well as I think I do, this was all a ruse she designed to brainwash her husband into helping her get free without walking naked through the streets.
Jaime Lannister and the Tyrells march on the High Sparrow, ready to fight to save Margaery. But they don’t need to because Tommen has made a “holy alliance” with the High Sparrow. The crown and the faith are united as one, though there’s no word on whether Loras is already free.
Now that King Tommen is under the High Sparrow’s control, Jaime is removed from the Kingsguard and exiled from King’s Landing. His new assignment is to help Walder Frey fight back against the Blackfish, Catelyn Stark’s uncle. Hmm, isn’t that where Brienne and Sansa were heading to get his help in fighting Ramsey Bolton? I think Jaime just bought himself a ticket into the impending Winterfell War.
Bran Is Saved
Meera tries to drag Bran to safety ass his new role of Three-Eyed Raven floods his mind with memories, including a few of Mad King Aerys and his obsession with wildfire. The Night King’s skeleton army is about to capture them, but then the two are saved by a mystery man wielding a bad-ass flaming chain.
Who is he? Why, it’s Benjen Stark, Ned’s brother and Bran’s uncle. In case you forgot, he was a range for the Night’s Watch and went missing North of the Wall way back in season 1, presumed dead all this time.
The Rebirth of Arya Stark
Arya attends the second half of the hilarious play, this time centered on King Joffrey’s death. However, in the play Tyrion is the villain who did it and every boos him while crying over Joffrey’s death. Well, except for Arya who laughs inappropriately.
During the bows, Arya goes backstage to poison Lady Crane’s liquor. But then something strange happens. Arya talks to the actress and has a change of heart. In the play, Cersei mourned the death of her son, but Arya points out that she would actually be angry, unable to say goodbye to the person she loved most in the world. Perhaps this hit Arya a little too close to home, allowing her to reignite her own angry over her father’s death.
Whatever the case, Arya saves Lady Crane’s life and decides to quit being an intern for the House of Black and White. She goes back to find her trusty sword, Needle, and it looks like Arya Stark isn’t No One anymore, she’s Arya of House Stark, ready to go back and kill all of those people who need killing.
The bad news for her is that Jaqen doesn’t like quitters, so he orders the Waif to find and execute Arya. Just like the mob, the only way to escape the Many-Faced God is in a body bag.
Meet the Tarlys
Sam and Gilly arrive at his family’s home, but it’s a short visit. His mom and sister are awesome, but his brother is a dick and his father is an ass. At dinner Lord Tarly fat shames his son and gets furious when he learns Gilly is a wildling. Thankfully Gilly stands up for herself, talking about how brave and strong Sam is. In the end, Sam decides he doesn’t want to leave Gilly and the baby, so he takes them with him. But he also grabs his family’s sword, made of Valyrian steel, for good measure. Other than getting a sword, stopping back at Sam’s home was pretty pointless.
Dany and Her Dragon
Daenerys is on her way back to Meereen, but first she reconnects with her dragon, rides him for a bit and gives another rousing speech to her Dothraki khalasar. Yeah, we get it, she’s the Mother of Dragons. Now quit talking about taking a thousand ships, sailing to Westeros and taking the Iron Throne and just do it already!
(Image courtesy of HBO)