Ever since Jon Snow died in the season 5 finale of Game of Thrones, fans have wondered if the red priestess Melisandre can use her magic to bring him back to life. After all, we now know she has a magical necklace that keeps her young. In this episode, “Home,” we get the answer.
But before we get there, two characters murder their own brothers, Tyrion unchains the dragons and Bran Stark is back.
The Wildlings Take Castle Black
Alliser Thorne’s deadline is up at Castle Black and his men are about to knock down the door and kill Davos. But Eddison Tollett returns just in time with some help in the form of the wildlings. Most importantly, there’s a giant who picks up a guy, smashes him against a wall and flings his dead body across the courtyard. Obviously Thorne’s men surrender immediately.
So now Edd and Tormund Giantsbane are in charge of Castle Black while Alliser Thorne and everyone else who stabbed Jon Snow is locked up.
Jon Snow Is Alive!
Once things settled down, Davos Seaworth asks the question fans have been waiting for. He goes to Melisandre and asks if her magic can bring Jon Snow back to life. She knows other red priests have done it, but she can’t. Still, he begs her to try.
Melisandre does her thing, which involves cleaning the blood off Jon’s washboard abs and giving him a haircut. She does her spell and…nothing. Jon Snow is still dead, so Melisandre, Edd, Tormund and Davos all leave.
But wait! The very last moment of the episode features Jon Snow gasping back to life!
JON SNOW IS ALIVE! JON SNOW IS ALIVE!
I know it was a total fake out and it kind of diminishes the impact of the season 5 finale, but who gives a crap because Jon Snow is back and ready to kick some damn ass!
Ramsey Gets Even Eviler
In case you were on the fence about whether Ramsey Bolton is more evil than King Joffrey, this episode makes it obvious. Roose Bolton’s wife gives birth to a son and Ramsey is immediately threatened that this new baby will be a more legitimate heir than he is. So what does Ramsey do?
Well, first he kills his own father, stabbing him in the gut in almost the exact same way Roose killed Robb Stark at the Red Wedding. Since Roose was always a bad guy, killing him isn’t so bad, except for the fact that it’s patricide.
The bad part comes when Ramsey takes his stepmom and her newborn baby to his kennel and literally unleashes the hounds on them. Yes, Ramsey just made his dogs eat his baby brother. Not even in the most sick and twisted recesses of Joffrey’s imagination could he have dreamed up something that sadistic.
Greyjoy Family Drama
While Brienne and Podrick promise to take Sansa to Castle Black to be with her brother Jon (which is now 100 percent less sad since he’s alive), Theon Greyjoy decides to leave them and go back home to the Iron Islands.
However, things back home aren’t so pretty. Theon’s father Balon crosses a rickety old bridge and confronts his brother Euron, who proceeds to kill him to take control. For those of you keeping track at home, that’s now five male characters dead this season who were previously introduced, including Prince Martell, his son and his bodyguard last week.
Euron plans to take over, but Yara also wants to rule the Iron Islands. It will all be decided at an upcoming election. I guess this means the War of the Five Kings is officially over since the five “Kings” in question were Robb, Joffrey, Stannis, Renly and Balon, all dead.
The Return of Bran
After being MIA for all of last season, Bran Stark is back, still training his warg skills with the Three-Eyed Raven. He’s able to have visions of the past, including one with young Ned Stark along with his brother Benjen and sister Lyanna. Most importantly, we learn that Hodor was a stable boy named Willis and he actually spoke real words. Other than that, Bran, Hodor and Meera Reed are just killing time waiting to become useful.
How to Unchain Your Dragons
In Meereen, the city is being run by Tyrion, Varys, Missandei and Grey Worm, the best foursome ever assembled on this show. Things are rough, especially since all the other cities Dany freed have gone back to slavery. Tyrion’s big plan to save them is to unchain the two dragons locked away beneath the pyramids.
Tyrion really can talk himself out of any situation because he’s somehow able to keep the dragons calm and get them to avoid eating him. He unlocks their chains and they’re free. If Dany is the Mother of Dragons, I guess that makes Tyrion the Fun Uncle of Dragons.
The Lannisters Prepare to Strike
In King’s Landing, Jaime and King Tommen say goodbye to Myrcella at her funeral. The High Sparrow shows up and Jaime is ready to kill him until he realizes that he’s surrounded by those religious nutjobs and they have nothing to lose. Exacting revenge is going to take some thinking, not just violence.
As for King Tommen, he finally realizes that he’s a completely pathetic and useless ruler who can’t do anything right, so he asks his mommy for help. Does this mean Cersei is gonna turn him into Joffrey 2.0? Cuz Ramsey already has that title.
Arya Makes Progress
Finally, Blind Arya is still getting her ass kicked once a day by the Waif. Jaqen H’Ghar shows up to test Arya’s loyalty by promising to give her food, shelter and even her sight back if she’ll say her name. She insists that she’s No One, which is the correct answer, so she gets to move on to the next level in this weird House of Black and White cult.
(Image courtesy of HBO)