Last week on Dance Moms, Abby cut the whole team and brought in superstar dancer Sophia. This week, Abby lets her old dancers (and moms) return, but not without letting them know that Sophia is now the top dancer in the Abby Lee Dance Company. Yes, it’s true that Sophia is terrific. Still, that’s not why Abby’s throwing it in everyone’s faces. The moms made a power play last week, and Abby’s ruthlessly trying to ensure that it never happens again. 

Of course, it’s not fair for Abby to take out her anger on the kids. In an interview, Chloe laments that Miss Abby keeps telling the girls that Sophia is the best dancer in the group. Poor Chloe. She deserves a dance teacher with her priorities in check.

Let the Hazing Begin

Now that the dance moms have come crawling back, Abby’s exerting even more dominance than ever. She makes everyone sign a one-year contract, then assigns the moms jobs around the studio, regardless of the fact that they’re all technically paying customers. On top of that, Abby puts every dancer (except Sophia) on probation. Everyone’s at the bottom of the pyramid except the lone star, Sophia. 

Some of the moms play it safe and help out around the studio. Not surprisingly, Holly and Melissa take out the trash and organize costume closets like good, obedient students. Also not surprisingly, Christi and Kelly are having none of it. In fact, Christi plots ways to haze Sophia’s mom, Jackie, by cooking up insane schemes to put E-6000 in her eyelash glue and roofie her drink. Kelly is horrified and laughs, “You’re evil!” When Kelly doubts your moral compass, lady, you’re in trouble. 

The Kids are All Right

While the “adults” sling insults about weight and stupidity, the kids focus on the tasks at hand: dancing beautifully and winning prizes. Sophia shows that she really does have the goods by winning first place in the solo competition. (I mean, the girl can do 54 pirouettes in tap shoes.) Chloe vows to work her hardest to match Sophia’s excellence, giving a lovely, elegant and emotive performance that wins the “Expressive Heart Award.”  A judge calls Chloe “humble and heartwarming.” I agree. 

The whole team performs a high-energy dance that wins first place in the group competition, which everyone is thrilled about but Abby. Abby marches backstage to announce, “I’m glad the judges weren’t looking at all of those mistakes!” She declares Sophia’s dance “outstanding” (which is accurate), but she loses me when she calls Chloe’s dance “a hot mess.” Say what? 

Abby points out flaws in Chloe’s flexibility and balance in a fairly unconstructive way, making it clear that Abby’s trying to indirectly hurt Christi. Christi may be a piece of work, but Chloe is a sweet girl who deserves a serious teacher. 

After this week, I’m starting to wonder if it’s Abby who should be put on probation.

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(Image courtesy of Lifetime)

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Contributing Writer, BuddyTV