Did you know Blake Shelton won The Voice
the last three times? It's only the third night of auditions, and I want to take his trophies and shove it ... in his face. Or something. We get it! You won three times and have shiny trophies.
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Speaking of Blake, his winner from last season, Danielle Bradbery, was just booked to perform "The Heart of Dixie" on this season's Hart of Dixie,
according to The Hollywood Reporter
. I can see why that's happening.
But we're on the third night of auditions, and since the premiere, we were teased to the fact that Kaley Cuoco's sister would audition, so let's see how things shape up.
Ray Boudreaux ("Use Me" by Bill Withers)
Is having an adorable child the new sob story? You know, the thing about you that makes sappy viewers like me get an emotional attachment. If you don't have a sob story, it's a cute kid, like this young, single father with an old soul, or so says Carson Daly.
The guy from Louisiana with a twang definitely pulls a performance out of left field with this bluesy '70s tune and strumming his guitar. He has a cool vibe and sound about him.
Adam says Ray looks like Blake but sounds like Cee Lo, which is interesting since both turned around for him. Blake calls the performance swampy, which is apparently what he wanted to hear since he selects Team Blake.
Lina Gaudenzi ("Landslide" by Fleetwood Mac)
Her mom was one of the first Victoria's Secret catalog models, so she modeled as well, but then stopped in high school because she said she gained 40 pounds. She studied both classical music and opera.
Her voice has this interesting shake and/or tremble. It's kind of odd, but I like it because it's soothing. And she finishes off with these impressive runs, not too much and not all over the place. She definitely knows how to control her voice.
Christina tries to play to her, saying she went very far with an opera singer. And honestly, I think Blake just pushed his button because it would've been dumb if Lena only got one judge to turn around. Lina goes with Team Christina!
Juhi ("Mercy" by Duffy)
She's 16, no last name and has blue/green hair who grew up listening to classical Indian music. She wants to study computer science or aerospace engineering and her dad also has a fancy pants degree.
I was secretly hoping she would sound terrible because she's already managed to bug me in the short time she's been on the show. But her voice is definitely unique, and she has a ton of energy on stage.
Well, Team Cee Lo's fate is sealed when Juhi says she wants to be a mix of Amy Winehouse and Kurt Cobain. Sorry, Christina.
Malford Milligan ("Let's Stay Together" by Al Green)
This 54-year-old who's been singing for about 20 years worries about how he looks because he's still a kid inside: growing up in the '60s, he went to an all-black school, and as a black Albino, he said he was the outcast. He's also legally blind, and channeled all the pain into singing.
It's a tough song, and he's so close to getting Christina to press her button. But like she says, she was waiting for one big moment to solidify the performance, but it just didn't come. No one turns around.
Justin Blake ("Sure Be Cool If You Did" by Blake Shelton)
At 20, he's grateful to just have a job because a lot of people in his town in Tennessee don't. He calls himself an escort driver, driving behind 18-wheelers and mobile homes. He also has a kid on the way. The Voice really seems to be finding people who have children at a pretty young age. Shifty eyes.
Adam pushes his button, and all eyes are on Blake. Christina even tells him that Adam turned around, as if Blake didn't know that. I really just think Adam wants a country singer because Blake doesn't even turn around, and no one else does either! Yeah, it's his song so he's extra critical. But the performance's pretty forgettable. Either way, Justin is on Team Adam.
Timyra-Joi ("Girl on Fire" by Alicia Keys)
She's 15, and has been taking vocal lessons for forever (in fact, her family moved in with her coach after her dad lost his job) and she's hoping she gets on Cee Lo's team.
Well, she doesn't sound 15, I'll tell you that much, but does sound her age because she's a little rough around the edges. She could be more refined. Christina pushes her button right away, and Blake and Cee Lo get theirs in at the end just in time.
Adam calls her an unpolished diamond, which is a great description. She gets on Team Christina, as she should.
Monika Leigh ("The Thrill is Gone" by BB King)
At 22, she stopped singing because she thought she was getting older. What?! But four years later, she knows singing's what she's meant to do.
She has a strong voice, but I'm honestly bored with the performance. It hasn't been an exciting night of auditions, to say the least.
Adam, Cee Lo, then Blake all press their buttons, and then sing high praise for her. She lands on Team Blake after more mumbo-jumbo about winning or losing or brushing his teeth. Whatever, Blake.
Zach Hinson ("Drunk On You" by Luke Bryan)
He's a firefighter from Washington, sporting a cowboy hat and guitar. Plus, he's pretty.
Well, he's definitely better than the other country guy. There's a rough edge to his voice, like he could be a country rocker. But there's obvious pitch issues and no one turns around.
Briana Cuoco ("You and I" by Lady Gaga)
She's a personal assistant to her famous sister but has her own aspirations. Kaley says she's obsessed with the show and is even there to support her sister. I'm not a fan of The Big Bang Theory, but I do really, really like her.
It starts off on the shaky side. The music is overpowering her somewhat soft voice, but then she hits the bigger notes, and it's like the power came out of nowhere. Kaley's cute backstage during the performance as she's happy/crying for her sister.
It's between Christina and Cee Lo, who pushes his button near the end. It's funny that no one recognizes her last name, but I suppose it could've been edited out. She's with Team Christina.
George Horga Jr. ("Treasure" by Bruno Mars)
Let's just get it out there: he's definitely the pretty boy of the season. He's 18 and moved away from home, which is a big deal in the Romanian community, as he's supposed to live with his family until he's married.
The crowd loves him, of course. I do hear something different in his voice, but I think this is a hard song where that can shine. Plus, he's trying to be too much like Bruno Mars. He gets on Team Cee Lo because he's the only one to turn around.
We then hear three more singers rather quickly who all get just one judge: R&B singer Anthony Paul is on Team Cee Lo, pop singer Cilla Chan is with Team Blake and rocker Jacob Poole lands with Team Christina.
Preston Pohl ("Electric Feel" by MGMT)
He took a year off from music after a band member passed away, but now he's back. If he can sing as cool as he sounds when he speaks, then this is going to be a good performance.
It's a great way to close out an otherwise dud of a night. He's really energetic and makes me think of Bruno Mars again. All the guys turn around at the same time, but Christina can't just give him that last one.
Preston chooses Team Adam!
The judges agree with me that it wasn't the best night of auditions, as there were zero four-chair turnarounds and only two singers got three judges to press their buttons.
To recap, Adam added two singers and Cee Lo added three, giving each coach a total of seven. Christina grabbed four and has eight singers total. Blake added three and has seven total singers.
The Voice returns Tuesday night at 8pm on NBC for the fourth night of the blind auditions.