Well, we’re four episodes in to the eighth season of The Vampire Diaries and things are getting wild. I’m guessing during the hiatus, a few writers sat in a room and said, “It’s the final season, let’s throw everything at these guys. Let’s make everyone as miserable as possible. We’ll throw in some happy times, maybe a Stefan and Caroline engagement, but then we’ll ruin it by killing off their friends.” And then everyone else was like, “Done!”

Warning: you might want to turn a light on because this episode “An Eternity of Misery” is dark!

The First Psychic

The show opens with two girls in 750 B.C. alone in the woods. One is scared and asks the other to tell her a happy story. The other girl proceeds to tell her how a long time ago, there was a man in a village named Arcadius. He went by the name Cade. He was a gentle man full of kindness and respect. He also had a special ability; he was psychic. Not just that, he was the first psychic. One would think that’s pretty cool, but one day he overstepped his bounds and said the wrong thing to the wrong person at the wrong time. The villagers turned against him and burned him at the stake. He saw the evil consume his murderers and before his last breath, he let out a psychic blast that was so powerful it created his own world — hell.
(That doesn’t seem like a happy story to me, but it is important to remainder of this episode.)

In present day, Stefan and Alaric have Sybil quarantined in the Armory. They think they can torture her with the tuning fork and she’ll tell them why Damon is still being controlled by her, and how he can be saved. But nothing is ever that easy on The Vampire Diaries. Instead of a flat out answer, we get an hour of storytime and allegory. 

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Sybil cryptically reveals her history to Stefan and Alaric. In the episode, it isn’t initially clear which role Sybil plays in this story, but for the sake of recapping, I’ll keep it simple. It goes like this, when she was a child she developed psychic abilities. Of course, this was way after Cade has been killed for his special power. The villagers were still uneasy, so anyone who possessed psychic ability was banished to an island. She arrived on the island of misfit toys thinking she was completely alone, but she wasn’t. There was another girl there as well, and she could read minds too. The two became like sisters.

There was no food on the island, and the girls were hungry. They saw a ship in the distance, and decided to try to call for help. It worked, sort of. The ship attempted to come ashore but crashed in the rocks killing all of the sailors. The older girl was able to salvage some of the ships provisions so they could eat. When Sybil found out the sailors had died trying to help them she became very sad. She said if God intended for them to eat, then he would provide food. She asked that the older sister never call on the ships again. The older girl promised she wouldn’t.

As time went on, the older girl was still bringing food back to camp. She said she was able to hunt wild boar on the other side of the island. Sybil eventually found out this wasn’t true. The girl was calling ships ashore, and sailors continued to die. She finally realized there were never provisions on those ships either. She had been eating the bodies of the sailors. Her siren sister forced her to be a cannibal. (Like I said earlier, this episode is dark.)

The story raises a few questions. Stefan and Alaric want to know who the other siren is. Sybil wants to know which character from the story Stefan identifies with the most — is he good or evil? 

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Damon Can’t Be Stopped

Damon technically isn’t under Sybil’s spell anymore, but he continues to find himself doing what he thinks she would want him to. He ends up at an auto body shop. He’s looking for a guy named Peter Maxwell, but he finds Lou. Damon is still on his spree so he feels the need to kill Lou after finding out he had been married five times, and had actually killed one of his wives. Damon pours gasoline all over Lou. Then when Lou goes back to the weld job he had been working on he’s suddenly engulfed in flames.

Peter Maxwell owns the body shop. He shows up not much later, and Damon is waiting for him. Damon questions if he knows Sybil. Peter says he doesn’t, even after being compelled. Damon tells him he’s looking for a family heirloom, but he doesn’t know specifically which heirloom. Damon wants Peter’s watch. He tosses it to him. When Damon catches it, it burns his hand. He realizes Peter is on vervain. This is enough to make Damon stab him. Right after stabbing Peter, someone shoots Damon through the gut. Damon turns around to see Matt Donovan, Peter’s son. Matt shoots him again.

When Damon comes to, he’s chained to a chair in the shop. Matt wants to know why he tried to kill his father. (Matt is clearly out of the loop here.) When it looks like he’s going to torture Damon for awhile, Damon tells him he should be more concerned with Tyler Lockwood. Damon tells him he tore into his neck the night before and left him in the truck of the car at a park and ride. If he wants to save him, he better hurry. Matt leaves — and he’s going to be too late.

Damon uses this time to try to break free. He struggles before knocking over a tall shelf rack, causing it to fall on him knocking the chair over. He also finds the heirloom he had been looking for. It looks like a cannonball with some weird symbol on it. 

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Who is the Siren Sister?

While Alaric is at the Armory, Georgie breaks into his house to steal a book. She gets caught by the nanny, Seline. She says she’s going to call Alaric. Georgie tries to intimidate her by sounding pretty threatening. The next time we see Georgie she is at the Armory. Alaric does get a call from Seline which seems to alarm him a little bit. He goes after Georgie, but it’s a trap. She locks him in that weird tunnel from the first episode — the one where the only way you can find your way out is if you can’t see or hear anything.

With Alaric out of the way, Georgie finds Stefan and vervains him in the neck. He falls to the ground unconscious. Sybil uses this tuning fork-free moment to jump inside Stefan’s brain. They’re in a cave back on the island. Sybil continues her story about cannibalism. She reveals that she tried so hard to be good, but her sister forced evil upon her. Stefan asks if he’s supposed to feel sorry for her. She says it depends and asks him again which side he is on. There’s a noise and it’s finally revealed that her siren sister is… Seline!

Stefan wakes up and is only able to remember pieces of what just happened. Sybil erased the part about Seline. Lucky for us, the next scene is Georgie calling Seline telling her she did what she had asked. Seline tells her to pull over and she will find her.

Back at the Armory, Stefan is confused. He doesn’t understand why Sybil didn’t escape. She isn’t done with her story yet. She’ll tell him how to save Damon, but again she needs to know if he is good or if he’s a monster. Stefan is honest and says that he is both. With that answer, Sybil tells him he’s ready for the truth.

She continues her story about the island. When she found out Seline had been feeding her sailors for breakfast, she threw herself off a cliff. As she lay dying, they prayed for mercy, love and forgiveness. God never answered, instead Cade showed up. He said he would save both of them if they served him. They would feed on the bodies of the morally corrupt to keep themselves beautiful, and he would collect the souls in hell.

Stefan doesn’t believe in hell. Sybil says if he wants to save his brother all he has to do is kill the devil.

Seline vs. Georgie

Seline finds Georgie pulled over on the side of the road. She wants to know where Sybil is. Georgie says she didn’t want to come. She says that Sybil told her to tell Seline to piss off. Seline decides she has to kill the messenger She snaps Georgie’s neck. Georgie’s body falls to the ground, but she’s not dead — but she is, but she isn’t!

Seline is hovered over Georgie’s body eating her face like she’s overdosed on Flakka, but we also see Georgie standing behind her. Georgie doesn’t have much time to process her confusion before she is sucked up into the sky — the same way Katherine was.

Yikes. What did you guys think of tonight’s episode? Sound off in the comments below.

The Vampire Diaries airs Fridays at 8/7c on The CW. For more news check out our The Vampire Diaries Facebook page. 

(Image courtesy of The CW)

Casey Cummings

Contributing Writer, BuddyTV