I still miss Stacey. Do you miss Stacey? I don’t miss Elyse, but I bet Ozzy does. Ozzy is very upset with Keith and Whitney, who went behind his back and voted for Dawn. Pouting, Ozzy tells them that he’s a free agent. He is now playing for himself and the rest of Savaii is allowed to play for themselves.

Savaii tells him that he’s withholding, and Ozzy tells them he has the idol. He tells them they’re forgetting about Redemption (Island), and Keith offers, “if you wanna go there just let us know, man.” I’m still not sure about this Keith character.

Ozzy claims he’s just trying to be the provider and lead by example, but there’s got to be more to it than that. Savaii agrees that they deserve an apology, which Ozzy is not offering. He’s still throwing a hissyfit, much to Jim’s delight.

“The guy could not have made any worse moves than he did,” Jim declares. Cochran also realizes that this is great for him, calling Ozzy “a stupid bitch.” New Cochran’s on the upswing!

At Upolu, everyone is still wary of loose cannon, Brandon. Brandon finds the clue to the idol that Coach already has, then tells Albert and Coach that being a Hantz has its advantages. Coach wonders if it’s still Christian to withhold information, as Brandon goes tearing through camp looking for the idol. Yikes. Albert predicts that Brandon may figure out that someone already has it, but no.

“You wouldn’t think that somebody has it already, would you?” Brandon asks innocently. Albert, as usual, says nothing.

Christine battles Elyse at Redemption Island in front of Sophie, Rick, Keith, and Ozzy. Christine breaks down into tears. She’s tired of being on Redemption Island. Rick encourages her during the puck-sliding challenge, and Christine flips him off.

“Did you catch that?” Rick asks Sophie. Yeah, Rick, she caught that.

Despite her tiredness, Christine pulls ahead, knocking Elyse’s pucks off the table as Elyse knocks her own off. Elyse ties it up, they’re each down to one puck, and Christine wins it. She looks upset about it. She’s tired and doesn’t really want to be there anymore. Elyse is proud of herself for giving it her all and pushing herself. Seeya!

At Upolu, Edna tries cozying up to Coach to prove her trustworthiness and allegiance. Coach feels conflicted because he really likes Edna, but she’s also not part of the alliance and she is worthless in challenges. There is now a target on Mikayla’s back. Poor Mikayla.

Ozzy is feeling regret. He realizes he made a mistake, so he wants to try to make it happen with this tribe. This is a shame, because that whole “free agent” thing was way more exciting. Ozzy mends his alliance with Keith.

“I probably shouldn’t have told everyone about the idol,” Ozzy realizes. Then he apologizes to the tribe, and tries to explain to them, and himself, why he told them about the idol. Jim is fine with it because Ozzy will help them win challenges before the merge, and is a bigger target after.

For this immunity challenge, the tribes will be breaking coconuts. Cochran has already proved that he’s good at this back at camp. The teams are neck and neck assembling their wheelbarrows, but Ozzy runs the wheelbarrow into a post. It’s going well for Upolu because they’ve got Rick and Brandon, who probably do stuff like this all the time at home.

Ozzy and Cochran are not doing as well with the coconut wheelbarrow. At the slingshot portion of the challenge, Coach tells Albert, “no more Mikayla,” but she won’t be taken out. Coach asks her once again if she wants to just sit out, but she insists she “has it” with her one-handed coconut slinging.

Keith and Jim catch up, causing Savaii to win and Cochran to jump up and down like a little girl. No tribal council for them! In addition, they get to go to Sliding Rocks and have a picnic lunch. In the eternal words of Oda Mae Brown: Mikayla, “you in danger, girl.”

At the picnic, everyone is feeling happy and no one more than Ozzy. He’s feeling very affectionate toward his tribe, even though they voted his Survivor girlfriend off. Sliding Rocks looked fun, and even Cochran got into it.

At Upolu, it appears that Mikayla is the obvious target. But Albert doesn’t hate Mikayla for no reason. Edna sat out the challenge because she is so weak. Which is worse? Albert tells Mikayla what’s up and goes to bat for her with “the five.”

Albert convinces Sophie and Rick not to draft Edna in Fantasy Survivor, and now it’s time to go to Coach and Brandon about it. Brandon is torn, as usual. He doesn’t trust Edna, and regrets voting for Mikayla that first time. He says he will be a man of his word even if it costs him the game. So … that’s crazy.

Coach isn’t having it, though. He says he would rather take Edna into battle than Mikayla because Edna will follow almost blindly. Coach pulls Rick aside and tries to tell him to vote Mikayla out. It ends up being Rick’s choice. Does he want to piss Coach or Albert off? Or maybe he should just vote for Brandon or someone, it’s what Keith and Whitney would do!

At Tribal Council, the matter of numbers vs. loyalty at the merge comes up. So Mikayla isn’t loyal? Or are we talking about Brandon, who is pretty much crapping himself on that bench? He can’t stand it anymore, so he reveals the game plan to everyone right then and there.

“Vote me out today if we’re going to play disloyal,” Brandon offers. DO IT, UPOLU! He has gone mad, completely unhinged. Coach says that there are some cards you need to keep closer to your chest, which makes Brandon sick with righteous anger.

“That’s lasciviousness!” Brandon declares.

At the vote, it seems like people are pretty much going with the plan. Why aren’t they just voting for Brandon? Too risky, I guess.

The votes are split between Mikayla and Edna, three and three. Rick’s vote went to … Mikayla. I don’t know that he chose well to ally with Coach and Brandon. That dude is a nutcase and a liability.

(images courtesy of CBS)

Carla Patton

Writer, BuddyTV

Originally from Seattle, Carla recently took a husband and moved to Austin, Texas, where she is finally using her television “problem” to her advantage. It’s sort of like Dexter, but boring and less murdering. Carla’s favorite shows include 30 RockThe Amazing RaceProject RunwayModern Family, anything with murder, and pretty much anything gross and weird (CSIThe BachelorToddlers & Tiaras, etc.). Favorite canceled shows include: Arrested DevelopmentVeronica Mars and Average Joe. In her spare time, Carla leads tours of downtown Austin on a Segway (don’t knock it ’til you’ve tried it!), blogs about Netflix Instant, and visits elementary schools telling children they don’t need math to succeed (just kidding, stay in school, kids).