Welcome back, dance fans and celebrity stalkers!

It’s week 2 of Dancing with the Stars, and the remaining 11 pairs definitely have their work cut out for them.

After a stunning premiere — in which we learned that most of the season 11 celebrities can actually dance — the second week of  DWTS has a lot to live up to. The early elimination of David Hasselhoff and Kym Johnson also reminded us that anyone can, at any time, go home.

What can we expect this week? First of all, we’ll get a lot of fast dances, as each pair tackles either the jive or the quickstep. We are also likely to see a raised bar in terms of dance quality — if you can’t dance, you are not going to last long on this season of DWTS.

Click here for a full listing of tonight’s dance styles and song choices.

We now have some context for predicting each star’s potential, but it’s still early in the competition. Anyone can shine! Will Kyle Massey repeat last week’s stunner of a performance? Can Florence Henderson keep the pace? Will I be able to withstand Rick Fox’s charm long enough to give any sort of unbiased review? (Probably not. Just a warning.)

Whatever happens, I’ll be here, recapping as we go, cheering for the dancers and desperately trying to comprehend the judges. Join me and please leave comments as we watch together!

And here we go…

Hi Tom and Brooke! And the bongo player! And the trombone! Oh, and the dancers! And Bachelor fans? Check out who your next heart-throb will be (again)!

And it looks like Rick and Cheryl first. Ouch. Rick’s foot looks bad.

Rick Fox and Cheryl Burke
Dancing the jive to “Tush”

Judges’ Opinions:
Len: “It was compact, it was fun, it was full of energy! If you can dance a jive… you could become a contender.”
Bruno: “It’s like trying to get a California condor to dance with a hummingbird! And you did it!”
Carrie Ann: “For a big guy like yourself, it’s hard to do with the jive.”

My Opinion: Nice face Rick. OK, I can tell a little more that he’s super tall here. Not sure why. But man, he still looks nice. Not just the appearance either. The dancing seems pretty darn good too. Awesome dance!

Scores: 7+7+7 = 21

Lower than last week, but still pretty darn good for a first dance!

Florence Henderson and Corky Ballas
Dancing the quickstep to “Suddenly I See”

Judges’ Opinions:
Len: “On that performance, I’ll see you next week.”
Bruno: “I loved the grand dame entrance… At times it looked a little like Driving Miss Daisy.”
Carrie Ann: “That is incredible that you’re out there dancing with such ease and elegance.”

My Opinion: From the rehearsal video, I think Florence’s next role might be Tarzan. A bit slow to start, but I love that dress. She looks good when they speed up, although that might be the cool dress distracting me again. I’m guessing that this isn’t perfect, but it looks pretty good. Not liking Corky’s over-the-top theatrics quite as much though.

Scores: 7+6+6 = 19

Brandy and Maksim Chmerkovskiy
Dancing the jive to “Magic”

Judges’ Opinions:
Len: “This time you took a slight step back. It was a little bit brittle.”
Bruno: “At the moment, you look like a Gwen Stefani-backing dancer…. OK from you is not good enough, because I know you could be superb!”
Carrie Ann: “You’re just so happy to be doing the jive… But you didn’t point your toes!”

My Opinion: Because I apparently need to comment on dresses, I don’t like this so much. Schoolgirl meets Hello Kitty-gone-insane. Maybe it is the dress, but Brandy doesn’t seem quite as smooth and confident this week. Still definitely competent but not as into-it seeming as before. The jive might not be her dance. She’s fun on stage though!

Scores: 7+7+7 = 21

Michael Bolton and Chelsie Hightower
Dancing the jive to “Hound Dog”

Judges’ Opinions:
Len: “Well, I don’t think the world’s quite ready for your interpretation of the jive.”
Bruno: “I am a dog lover, but you make it so hard for me…. You did it all very, very badly. I think this is probably the worst jive in 11 seasons.”
Carrie Ann: “Unfortunately, Michael, it was very awkward.”

My Opinion: Wow, everyone’s sick this week. That must really suck. And that’s a doghouse. OK then. He still looks a little stiff and off, but Michael’s definitely looking better than last week. Maybe not up to the standards of some of the other dancers, but improved. Possibly the jive just looks better on him than the waltz did. Decent, but not exciting.

Scores: 4+5+3 = 12

Ouch.

Audrina Patridge and Tony Dovolani
Dancing the quickstep to “Love Machine”

Judges’ Opinions:
Len: “That was the best dance tonight!” (That’s literally all he said.)
Bruno: “The show pony is turning into Secretariat. The movement was great!”
Carrie Ann: “Huge improvement…. I thought it was a fantastic performance.”

My Opinion: Audrina just looks like a dancer. That’s got to be a plus. Also, dancing well seems to be working for her. This looks like a good dance for her. Can’t say I like the dress, but she definitely makes it work. I liked that!

Scores: 8+8+7 = 23

Will Tony be able to dance without leg hair? Hmmm…

Jennifer Grey and Derek Hough
Dancing the jive to “Shake It”

Judges’ Opinions:
Len: “It was bright. It was colorful. Full on, fabulous job.”
Bruno: “That was a killer jive! That choreography was difficult beyond belief.”
Carrie Ann: “You’re kind of like this sexy hot bionic bunny out there dancing the jive!”

My Opinion: Yes, Derek. It is best to get through a jive without killing your partner. But seriously? DWTS as preventative medicine? That’s different. Cancer or no, wow. She can move! Is that what the jive is supposed to look like? No wonder they didn’t like Michael Bolton. And “Shake” is right. I heartily approve of the interpretation of the song! Well done! And they’ve died on the floor. But it’s probably not terminal.

Score: 8+8+8 = 24

What do you have to do to get above an 8 here? Oh well, still a good score!

Oh, so Sarah Palin showed up this week. Nope, not like a hockey game at all. I’d be so embarrassed if my mother was interviewed before I danced. Thank goodness my mother isn’t famous! Not likely to ever happen then.

Margaret Cho and Louis Van Amstel
Dancing the jive to “Dreaming”

Judges’ Opinions:
Len: “I appreciate you took on board our comments from last week…. It was definitely better than last week.”
Bruno: “You got to keep it tight! When you relax, when you smile… it changes everything.”
Carrie Ann: “You definitely gave it your all, there was definite improvement!”

My Opinion: Ack! The zebra is bleeding pink! Margaret looks like she’s having fun with this, which is good. Especially after last week. So far, a lot better than that performance too, as far as I can see. I don’t think she’s anything like as good as the last dance, but they’re doing a lot better than, say, Michael Bolton. But… the dress. Oh, the humanity!!!

Scores: 6+6+6 = 18

Kyle Massey and Lacey Schwimmer
Dancing the quickstep to “I Want You To”

Judges’ Opinions:
Len: “It was hardly a classic quickstep…. It lacked any style, but… I liked it.”
Bruno: “As a performer, you are a powerhouse of boundless energy…. In ballroom, you need more control.”
Carrie Ann: “You were a little flat-footed, but welcome to the new school of quickstep!”

My Opinion: If Florence was going for Tarzan, Kyle is going for Chewbacca. It may not be his dance, but this guy can sell a dance to anyone. He still looks awesome, and I still can’t believe that someone as round as Kyle can do those moves! Wait, where’d he go under all that dress? He’s not going anywhere soon, is he?

Scores:  8+7+7 = 22

Kurt Warner and Anna Trebunskaya
Dancing the jive to “Danger Zone”

Judges’ Opinions:
Len: “Much improved! Well done!”
Bruno: “This is a cool guy that does a cool jive…. You’ve got it — I can’t wait to see your progression over this competition.”
Carrie Ann: “You know, you kind of remind me of everyone’s favorite uncle who gets drunk at the wedding… and the inner dancer comes out.”

My Opinion: Moon walk? Hah! Calisthenics in a jive? I guess that works. Kurt definitely has the attitude for the jive — much better than when he waltzed. He looks a bit goofy. But hey, I like goofy sometimes! Overall, I’m liking this dance from Kurt much better than last week’s. Not one of the best of the night, but a solid middle performance.

Scores: 7+7+7 = 21

The Situation and Karina Smirnoff
Dancing the quickstep to “We No Speak Americano”

Judges’ Opinions:
Len: “It was a series of unfortunate events throughout…. For a difficult dance, you did a good job. Better than last week.”
Bruno: “I could tell you wanted to do it well so badly…. You have to find the right balance!”
Carrie Ann: “You have to work on some musicality…. You’re not dancing with the music!”

My Opinion: He likes to say the word “situation,” doesn’t he? Rehearsal does improve things, I suppose, but he’s still a little sloppy-looking out there. Probably the goofy grin does not help my opinion. Way better than last weeks cha cha, but it needs way more smoothness to be really good.

Scores:  6+6+6 = 18

Bristol Palin and Mark Ballas
Dancing the quickstep to “You Can’t Hurry Love”

Judges’ Opinions:
Len: “It’s neat, it’s precise, it just needs a bit more flare.”
Bruno: “There is a fresh, non-showbiz quality about you that is so refreshing.”
Carrie Ann: “You remind me of one of my favorite dancers, Kelly Osbourne…. I can’t wait to see you come back week after week.”

My Opinion: Did they just bump heads? I would totally give myself a concussion doing that. And I can’t say I like that dress. Maybe if they took out the bottom part? The top is cute. Oh right. Dancing. I’m supposed to talk about the dancing. She’s definitely got the dancing down this week. A smooth performance overall. I can’t help but see her as a beginner who looks too stiff and unsure to convince me.

Scores: 7+8+7 = 22

And that’s that for tonight! Who was your favorite? Who was the worst? Who do you think will go home, and who’s sticking around for a long time to come? Leave your comments and opinions!

(Image courtesy of ABC)

Laurel Brown

Senior Writer, BuddyTV

Laurel grew up in Mamaroneck, NY, Grosse Pointe, MI and Bellevue WA. She then went on to live in places like Boston, Tucson, Houston, Wales, Tanzania, Prince Edward Island and New York City before heading back to Seattle. Ever since early childhood, when she became addicted to The Muppet Show, Laurel has watched far too much TV. Current favorites include ChuckModern FamilySupernaturalMad Men and Community. Laurel received a BA in Astrophysics (yes, that is possible) from Colgate University and a PhD in Middle Eastern Studies and History of Science from Columbia University before she realized that television is much better than studying.