The only real showmance of Big Brother 17 (sorry, Austin and Liz) is getting broken up this week. Clay and Shelli are on the block and in this episode, one of them will be evicted. They’re both super sad about it, but it’s hard for me to care since they’re just a bland couple who helped evict all of the interesting personalities of the season.

Which one will go? Who will win the next HoH? Will there ever be another BB Takeover? Let’s find out.

BUT FIRST…this is my Big Brother 17 live blog!

For some reason we start with a recap of the entire season, mainly about how the Sixth Sense dominated the first half of the game and now the underdogs are in control. Julie Chen is wearing a mustard yellow dress and wearing glasses.

Shelli’s Stealth Campaign

Clay says that James not using the PoV is like kicking a dog when it’s down. Seriously? James makes it clear that he wants Shelli to be evicted. Vanessa wants to keep Shelli because it will help keep the Sixth Sense together. Shelli wants to fight to stay without hurting Clay.

James tells Austin about all of the things Clay and Shelli told him about the Judas vote and nominating James. He’s upset that they threw him under the bus, but wrongly claims he did everything to protect Clelli this week. Austin fills in Vanessa, making up that they sold out their alliance to try and get her closer to him than Clelli. Vanessa is “pissed and disappointed” that Clay and Shelli would sell out their alliance.

Shelli says she’s not going to campaign, but she does and gets Vanessa to help try and keep her over Clay. Shelli acts like James pressured her to throw Austin under the bus. The level of self-delusion going on here is insane. However, they all agree that the Sixth Sense needs to stick together, even past all of this.

There’s also a bit of Clay and Shelli making out. The editors go way over the top with the music and I can’t tell if they’re sarcastically mocking this crap or not.

A War with James

James has a meeting in the HoH room with a bunch of people. He makes it clear that he wants to get Shelli out. Vanessa tries to make the case for keeping Shelli, but James comes back that a scorned woman is more dangerous than a scorned Clay. James, Jackie and Meg make a lot of good points. Vanessa keeps saying she doesn’t want anyone to feel pressured. All of this push back makes Jackie think that Vanessa is not planning on sending Shelli home ever.

Jackie makes it clear to James and Meg that they can’t trust Vanessa or Austin if they don’t evict Shelli and that this whole week was a waste. Preach, Queen Jackie!

The twins are on opposite sides of this debate, one hates Clay and the other thinks taking out a bigger threat like Shelli is the smart move. Even Austin and the twins are leaning towards taking out Shelli and not ruffling feathers.

The Hitmen

We get a segment of Derrick and Cody, aka the Hitmen, the Final 2 from last season. I hope this isn’t foreshadowing that this season is about to become as boring and predictable as last season was. They’re like brothers now. Derrick is all about his family and Cody is now a model, but they’re just happy that they’re best friends now. Derrick and Cody are rooting for James because he made a big move, which is hilarious since Derrick won by actively avoiding big moves at all costs. Cody takes his shirt off and everything else is just dull.

The Live Eviction

Julie Chen confirms that jury starts after this eviction. Clay asks everyone to vote for Shelli to stay. Disgusting. Shelli cries and calls Clay “my heart.” This is nauseating. They both say “y’all” about a million times.

Vanessa votes to evict…Clay
Meg votes to evict…Clay
Austin votes to evict…Clay
Jackie votes to evict…Clay
Liz votes to evict…Clay
Julia votes to evict…Clay
Steve votes to evict…Clay
Becky votes to evict…Clay
John votes to evict…Clay

Clay is evicted 9-0!

Congrats, the quitter who threw away his chance at half a million dollars for a chick he met a month and a half ago has given us our first unanimous vote of the season. He gets cheers which he absolutely does NOT deserve from the audience. Shelli cries some more inside the house.

Clay tells Julie he’s OK sacrificing himself for her dream. Obviously he didn’t care about Jason’s dream or him deserving a shot. He claims this relationship is the real deal. Ugh, this kind of crap is why I don’t recap The Bachelor. Clay finally takes responsibility for saving Austin and sending Jason home, something he and Shelli never did in the house.

Goodbye Messages: Everyone is nice. Shelli doesn’t know how she’ll live without him. Gag me.

Julie Chen puts Clay on blast about his dalliance with Drunk Meg and he kind of throws her under the bus as a bit of a skank.

The HoH Competition

Julie says they;re in the jury, but going to jury doesn’t mean you’re out of the game. It’s another endurance comp, the standard one to fill up a bowl with water using a funnel. But this time there are three balls and they can pick to win HoH, $5,000 or never be a Have-Not. Someone can win multiple prizes if they want.

Meg knows she sucks at this and makes jokes about it. Becky the hiker is doing well, as are Julia, Liz and Jackie. It seems like a girl might finally win this.

See Who Wins the Week 7 HoH Competition>>

Next week is a live double eviction!

(Image courtesy of CBS)

John Kubicek

Senior Writer, BuddyTV

John watches nearly every show on TV, but he specializes in sci-fi/fantasy like The Vampire DiariesSupernatural and True Blood. However, he can also be found writing about everything from Survivor and Glee to One Tree Hill and Smallville.