In this week’s episode of The Real Housewives of Orange County, bad feelings continue to fester between Shannon and Heather. Vicki deals with Briana’s impending move. And Heather and Terry’s hoedown leaves several of the guests feeling beaten down.
Even though Heather has her big hoedown to look forward to, she’s still a bit hung over from girls’ night. She rehashes the chair debacle (she sat, she was asked to move, she sat elsewhere, she threw a hissy fit). Heather believes people can only hide their true colors for so long, and she’s concerned that she’s just beginning to see an inkling of Shannon’s true self.
Shannon and Vicki meet to buy western attire for Heather’s theme party. Shannon insists that she’s looking forward to the event and excited that Heather’s going to be her neighbor. She’s hopeful that they can put “chair gate” behind them. Then she proceeds to go on about it to Vicki.
Both women have their own interpretation of how things went down, and in each scenario, the wounded party varies.
Vicki’s still being catty when it comes to Lizzie, referring to her as Izzie. Terry asks his wife if she thinks Vicki feels threatened. Heather thinks Vicki might be feeling a tad insecure around this pretty, smart newcomer, and tells her hubby that Lizzie handled Vicki’s bad behavior very well. She didn’t let the elder insurance entrepreneur walk all over her.
Oklahoma Isn’t Okay
Briana stops by COTO to ask her mom to accompany her to Oklahoma to find a home. Vicki cannot be making many fans in the state that’s not-so-OK with her. She suggests her daughter and son-in-law buy a home in California — nearby, of course — and just rent for the duration of time that Ryan is stationed in the Sooner State because that makes perfect sense. Briana explains to her mother that she doesn’t know if she and her little family will ever move back to the OC for good.
Briana, knowing how easy it is to wind up as her mother, says all the houses in the area where they’ll be looking is new construction because all the old residences were wiped out by a tornado.
The day of the Dubrow hoedown arrives. Heather’s setting herself up for a pretty big disappointment. Not only is this a party to celebrate the groundbreaking of the family’s new palatial digs, but it’s also a way for her and Terry to show how grateful they are for everything they have, including their friends. Something tells me she might not be so grateful for some of those friends by the time this shindig is over.
Tamra has a chat with Lizzie about Vicki. She tells the buxom brunette that Vicki is strong with her words and has no filter. This information might have been more useful to Lizzie before they all got together for the first time. Tamra warns Lizzie that the best way to handle Vicki is to stand her ground. That doesn’t seem like it will be a problem. Lizzie is a bit befuddled by the dynamic of Tamra and Vicki’s relationship, but just wait until Alice spends a little more time in Wonderland.
There’s Champs, and onion rings and dancing but no Shannon or Vicki. Type A personality Heather can’t let their tardiness disrupt her schedule. The guests are instructed to write a note wishing the family well in their new home, stick it in a jar and the jar gets buried under the foundation of the house. Tamra doesn’t see the point, saying, “What do you put? ‘I’m so happy that you’re rich, and you’re building a big goddamn house.’ Ooh, lucky you.”
Heather makes a speech, and they break ground. Vicki and Shannon show up fashionably late, missing the whole little ceremony. Terry and Heather take the twosome’s tardiness pretty personally.
It doesn’t take Shannon long to take David to task, not that it ever does. What is his crime this time? He and Vicki belly up to the bar and take a shot with a very attractive blonde who also happens to be engaged to a former or current baseball player. David doesn’t think to introduce his wife to this woman he just met, and it’s clear that Shannon’s just jealous. David takes his licks and apologizes.
Now Shannon’s in a bad mood, and she gets a guilt trip from Heather about her tardiness and how it threw off her carefully constructed schedule. Shannon and David’s excuse is that David coaches his daughters’ in a basketball league. Heather just can’t get past the fact that Shannon should have informed her of this beforehand. My question is, why would you put everything on hold for someone you barely know or like?
Heather asks for a heads-up next time, and Shannon is apologetic. Shannon feels humiliated by Heather’s second very public dressing-down. She heads to the bar with Vicki in tow. It turns out she told her husband to end practice early, and he refused. Shannon is still raw from the whole chair incident, and she really resents this most recent scolding. To make things worse, Vicki, also late, didn’t get a lesson on manners and etiquette from the hostess.
In a surprising plot twist, Vicki apologizes to Lizzie for her behavior on girls’ night. She admits to being rude. Just when you think Vicki’s turned over a new leaf, she then argues with Lizzie about whether or not the woman is Mexican. I’m confident that Lizzie knows her own ethnic background, but Vicki’s like a dog with a bone.
Vicki then finds Heather, despite Shannon’s explicit request otherwise, and tells her how upset Shannon is. Shannon bellyaches to Lizzie, while Heather chews Tamra and Vicki’s ears off. And it all comes back around to that damn chair. It must be nice to live the kind of life where this type of petty crap is your biggest problem.
It’s My Party and I’ll Kvetch If I Want To
As if things aren’t tense enough, Vicki decides to pull her snoring bit in the midst of Heather’s rehashing of her and Shannon’s unresolved issues. It never goes over well when Vicki does this, but she finds it amusing. Heather, having had her fill, gets up and walks off. She questions why Vicki would even come to her party if she finds her so boring.
Tamra goes to Shannon and tells her that Heather feels like Shannon is rude and doesn’t like her for no reason. Tamra and Vicki’s pot-stirring is really starting to take a toll on Heather. She feels they are constantly criticizing her and, in doing so, are telling her that they don’t want to be her friend.
Shannon is confident she can fight her own battles but feels this isn’t the proper time or place. So while Vicki and Tamra seem to be trying to help, their meddling is causing the cast iron kettle to boil over.
Probably peeved that he shelled out a fortune to listen to his wife whine all day, Terry has a word with Tamra. He says he gets the impression that she’s not backing Heather up. Vicki interjects that little things are becoming big things. She thinks they all need to lighten up and get a sense of humor.
Vicki, guilty of this herself, points out that the problem with women is that they don’t know how to just get over stuff. They let things fester. I’m blown away by Vicki’s oddly profound insight.
The Bad Seed
What could be a better combination than a mechanical bull and booze? I mean, what could possibly go wrong? It does seem to lighten the mood, even though Heather gets a little too worried about pulling a Britney. Heather makes sure the guy controlling this beast turns the speed up when it comes time for Tamra to take a ride. Tamra immediately tumbles off and hurts, possibly breaks, her arm.
Heather doesn’t own up that she instructed the operator to turn up the speed. In fact, she tells Tamra that’s what she gets for screwing with her. Wow, way to kick a girl when she’s down. Eddie takes Tamra to get an X-ray, and it turns out that nothing’s broken.
Tamra does comment that the guy turned things up a few notches before she took her ride, and she can’t figure out why. I find it hard to believe nobody witnessed Heather’s sabotage, and it will come back to bite her in the ass. Remember, there’s always the reunion.
The Real Housewives of Orange County airs Mondays at 9pm on Bravo.
(Image courtesy of Bravo)